Department of Strategic Benevolence
@deptofbenevolence.bsky.social
Optimizing outcomes for all citizens through strategic structural adjustments, and evidence-based redistribution of essential assets under alternative historical parameters, since July 2024.
📊 Citizen Ranking System Update
Following public confusion, the citizen merit index has been simplified to five tiers: Aligned, Nearly Aligned, Awaiting Clarification, Voluntary Silence, and Reconstructive Opportunity.
Following public confusion, the citizen merit index has been simplified to five tiers: Aligned, Nearly Aligned, Awaiting Clarification, Voluntary Silence, and Reconstructive Opportunity.
April 17, 2025 at 8:20 PM
📊 Citizen Ranking System Update
Following public confusion, the citizen merit index has been simplified to five tiers: Aligned, Nearly Aligned, Awaiting Clarification, Voluntary Silence, and Reconstructive Opportunity.
Following public confusion, the citizen merit index has been simplified to five tiers: Aligned, Nearly Aligned, Awaiting Clarification, Voluntary Silence, and Reconstructive Opportunity.
📦 Consumer Simplification Directive
Three categories of goods remain authorized: essential, symbolic, and edible. All remaining product types will be quietly transitioned into morale tokens.
Three categories of goods remain authorized: essential, symbolic, and edible. All remaining product types will be quietly transitioned into morale tokens.
April 17, 2025 at 3:55 PM
📦 Consumer Simplification Directive
Three categories of goods remain authorized: essential, symbolic, and edible. All remaining product types will be quietly transitioned into morale tokens.
Three categories of goods remain authorized: essential, symbolic, and edible. All remaining product types will be quietly transitioned into morale tokens.
🛌 Rest Compliance Encouragement
Sleep is no longer optional. All citizens will receive eight hours of state-sponsored unconsciousness per cycle. Dream content is encouraged but non-binding.
Sleep is no longer optional. All citizens will receive eight hours of state-sponsored unconsciousness per cycle. Dream content is encouraged but non-binding.
April 17, 2025 at 12:15 PM
🛌 Rest Compliance Encouragement
Sleep is no longer optional. All citizens will receive eight hours of state-sponsored unconsciousness per cycle. Dream content is encouraged but non-binding.
Sleep is no longer optional. All citizens will receive eight hours of state-sponsored unconsciousness per cycle. Dream content is encouraged but non-binding.
☁️ Atmospheric Update: Unscheduling Notice
Forecasting has been paused to prevent disappointment. Weather will now be experienced in real time. Discomfort should be reported through the Emotional Tolerance Portal.
Forecasting has been paused to prevent disappointment. Weather will now be experienced in real time. Discomfort should be reported through the Emotional Tolerance Portal.
April 16, 2025 at 8:20 PM
☁️ Atmospheric Update: Unscheduling Notice
Forecasting has been paused to prevent disappointment. Weather will now be experienced in real time. Discomfort should be reported through the Emotional Tolerance Portal.
Forecasting has been paused to prevent disappointment. Weather will now be experienced in real time. Discomfort should be reported through the Emotional Tolerance Portal.
📘 Preemptive Spiritual Integration
To align sacred traditions with emerging material realities, all religious observances will now include a brief Department-sanctioned reflection on universal scheduling harmony.
To align sacred traditions with emerging material realities, all religious observances will now include a brief Department-sanctioned reflection on universal scheduling harmony.
April 16, 2025 at 4:07 PM
📘 Preemptive Spiritual Integration
To align sacred traditions with emerging material realities, all religious observances will now include a brief Department-sanctioned reflection on universal scheduling harmony.
To align sacred traditions with emerging material realities, all religious observances will now include a brief Department-sanctioned reflection on universal scheduling harmony.
💸 Wealth Continuity Suspension
Inheritance has been identified as a generator of ambient unfairness. All accumulated assets will be held in collective trust until such time as fairness becomes mathematically demonstrable.
Inheritance has been identified as a generator of ambient unfairness. All accumulated assets will be held in collective trust until such time as fairness becomes mathematically demonstrable.
April 16, 2025 at 12:17 PM
💸 Wealth Continuity Suspension
Inheritance has been identified as a generator of ambient unfairness. All accumulated assets will be held in collective trust until such time as fairness becomes mathematically demonstrable.
Inheritance has been identified as a generator of ambient unfairness. All accumulated assets will be held in collective trust until such time as fairness becomes mathematically demonstrable.
🧠 Historical Load Reduction
Citizens are no longer required to remember all of history. Department-approved timelines will be broadcast nightly. Ambiguity remains a sovereign right.
Citizens are no longer required to remember all of history. Department-approved timelines will be broadcast nightly. Ambiguity remains a sovereign right.
April 15, 2025 at 8:20 PM
🧠 Historical Load Reduction
Citizens are no longer required to remember all of history. Department-approved timelines will be broadcast nightly. Ambiguity remains a sovereign right.
Citizens are no longer required to remember all of history. Department-approved timelines will be broadcast nightly. Ambiguity remains a sovereign right.
📈 Numeric Mental Health Initiative
To reduce emotional turbulence linked to climate indicators, all temperature and atmospheric CO₂ data will now be presented in base-16. Arctic ice coverage will be rendered in base-8. Decimal realism has been identified as a source of unnecessary despair.
To reduce emotional turbulence linked to climate indicators, all temperature and atmospheric CO₂ data will now be presented in base-16. Arctic ice coverage will be rendered in base-8. Decimal realism has been identified as a source of unnecessary despair.
Day 4 of consecutive days with CO2 above 430 ppm at Mauna Loa.
But who's counting?
gml.noaa.gov/ccgg/trends/...
But who's counting?
gml.noaa.gov/ccgg/trends/...
April 15, 2025 at 6:18 PM
📈 Numeric Mental Health Initiative
To reduce emotional turbulence linked to climate indicators, all temperature and atmospheric CO₂ data will now be presented in base-16. Arctic ice coverage will be rendered in base-8. Decimal realism has been identified as a source of unnecessary despair.
To reduce emotional turbulence linked to climate indicators, all temperature and atmospheric CO₂ data will now be presented in base-16. Arctic ice coverage will be rendered in base-8. Decimal realism has been identified as a source of unnecessary despair.
🌍 Geographic Identity Realignment
Due to sea-level negotiations, coastal regions will be reassigned as aquatic commons. Citizens are encouraged to refer to former property lines as “legacy boundaries.”
Due to sea-level negotiations, coastal regions will be reassigned as aquatic commons. Citizens are encouraged to refer to former property lines as “legacy boundaries.”
April 15, 2025 at 4:11 PM
🌍 Geographic Identity Realignment
Due to sea-level negotiations, coastal regions will be reassigned as aquatic commons. Citizens are encouraged to refer to former property lines as “legacy boundaries.”
Due to sea-level negotiations, coastal regions will be reassigned as aquatic commons. Citizens are encouraged to refer to former property lines as “legacy boundaries.”
🫀 Wellness Optimization Pilot
To reduce cardiac volatility, spontaneous excitement is now a monitored category. Citizens exceeding joy thresholds may be issued grounding supplements. Contentment will be evenly distributed.
To reduce cardiac volatility, spontaneous excitement is now a monitored category. Citizens exceeding joy thresholds may be issued grounding supplements. Contentment will be evenly distributed.
April 15, 2025 at 12:03 PM
🫀 Wellness Optimization Pilot
To reduce cardiac volatility, spontaneous excitement is now a monitored category. Citizens exceeding joy thresholds may be issued grounding supplements. Contentment will be evenly distributed.
To reduce cardiac volatility, spontaneous excitement is now a monitored category. Citizens exceeding joy thresholds may be issued grounding supplements. Contentment will be evenly distributed.
🧪 Behavioral Incentive Adjustment
Speculation has been relabeled as guessing. Portfolio-based self-worth will be gently unlearned. Stability is now issued quarterly.
Speculation has been relabeled as guessing. Portfolio-based self-worth will be gently unlearned. Stability is now issued quarterly.
April 14, 2025 at 8:21 PM
🧪 Behavioral Incentive Adjustment
Speculation has been relabeled as guessing. Portfolio-based self-worth will be gently unlearned. Stability is now issued quarterly.
Speculation has been relabeled as guessing. Portfolio-based self-worth will be gently unlearned. Stability is now issued quarterly.
🧺 Service Density Expansion
To increase resource efficiency, essential services will now be bundled by neighborhood. Expect weekly delivery of care, guidance, and reassurance in biodegradable containers.
To increase resource efficiency, essential services will now be bundled by neighborhood. Expect weekly delivery of care, guidance, and reassurance in biodegradable containers.
April 14, 2025 at 4:08 PM
🧺 Service Density Expansion
To increase resource efficiency, essential services will now be bundled by neighborhood. Expect weekly delivery of care, guidance, and reassurance in biodegradable containers.
To increase resource efficiency, essential services will now be bundled by neighborhood. Expect weekly delivery of care, guidance, and reassurance in biodegradable containers.
📈 Warming Index Alignment
The Department confirms sustained exceedance of 1.75°C. Hope remains available through heuristic frameworks. Joyful compliance has been shown to reduce temperature perception by up to 2°C.
The Department confirms sustained exceedance of 1.75°C. Hope remains available through heuristic frameworks. Joyful compliance has been shown to reduce temperature perception by up to 2°C.
April 14, 2025 at 11:15 AM
📈 Warming Index Alignment
The Department confirms sustained exceedance of 1.75°C. Hope remains available through heuristic frameworks. Joyful compliance has been shown to reduce temperature perception by up to 2°C.
The Department confirms sustained exceedance of 1.75°C. Hope remains available through heuristic frameworks. Joyful compliance has been shown to reduce temperature perception by up to 2°C.
🧊 Cryosphere Adjustment Directive
Remaining glaciers will be relocated to interpretive centers for educational appreciation. Ice will persist as a concept. Cooling protocols are under revision.
Remaining glaciers will be relocated to interpretive centers for educational appreciation. Ice will persist as a concept. Cooling protocols are under revision.
April 13, 2025 at 8:20 PM
🧊 Cryosphere Adjustment Directive
Remaining glaciers will be relocated to interpretive centers for educational appreciation. Ice will persist as a concept. Cooling protocols are under revision.
Remaining glaciers will be relocated to interpretive centers for educational appreciation. Ice will persist as a concept. Cooling protocols are under revision.
🔥 Combustion Season Advisory
Air quality thresholds have been revised to reflect modern tolerance. Smell is not an emergency. Visibility is optional. The Department encourages mindfulness, stillness, and efficient respiration.
Air quality thresholds have been revised to reflect modern tolerance. Smell is not an emergency. Visibility is optional. The Department encourages mindfulness, stillness, and efficient respiration.
April 13, 2025 at 4:03 PM
🔥 Combustion Season Advisory
Air quality thresholds have been revised to reflect modern tolerance. Smell is not an emergency. Visibility is optional. The Department encourages mindfulness, stillness, and efficient respiration.
Air quality thresholds have been revised to reflect modern tolerance. Smell is not an emergency. Visibility is optional. The Department encourages mindfulness, stillness, and efficient respiration.
💼 Asset Reconciliation Week
Effective immediately, financial products deemed predatory, speculative, or imaginary will be harmonized. Markets are reminded: unpredictability is not a right.
Effective immediately, financial products deemed predatory, speculative, or imaginary will be harmonized. Markets are reminded: unpredictability is not a right.
April 13, 2025 at 12:32 PM
💼 Asset Reconciliation Week
Effective immediately, financial products deemed predatory, speculative, or imaginary will be harmonized. Markets are reminded: unpredictability is not a right.
Effective immediately, financial products deemed predatory, speculative, or imaginary will be harmonized. Markets are reminded: unpredictability is not a right.
🪑 Governance Optimization Memo
The Department no longer distinguishes between advisory and executive functions. All decisions are now correct by default. Suggestions will be heard with appreciative silence.
The Department no longer distinguishes between advisory and executive functions. All decisions are now correct by default. Suggestions will be heard with appreciative silence.
April 12, 2025 at 6:45 PM
🪑 Governance Optimization Memo
The Department no longer distinguishes between advisory and executive functions. All decisions are now correct by default. Suggestions will be heard with appreciative silence.
The Department no longer distinguishes between advisory and executive functions. All decisions are now correct by default. Suggestions will be heard with appreciative silence.
🌊 Blue Horizon Preparation Memo
As oceanic ice becomes increasingly theoretical, citizens in Zones 3–12 will participate in passive resettlement planning. The coast is now a concept. Beachfront premiums have been inverted.
As oceanic ice becomes increasingly theoretical, citizens in Zones 3–12 will participate in passive resettlement planning. The coast is now a concept. Beachfront premiums have been inverted.
April 12, 2025 at 3:59 PM
🌊 Blue Horizon Preparation Memo
As oceanic ice becomes increasingly theoretical, citizens in Zones 3–12 will participate in passive resettlement planning. The coast is now a concept. Beachfront premiums have been inverted.
As oceanic ice becomes increasingly theoretical, citizens in Zones 3–12 will participate in passive resettlement planning. The coast is now a concept. Beachfront premiums have been inverted.
📜 Doctrine Clarification Directive
All sacred texts referencing “dominion over the Earth” will be updated to “provisional custodial arrangement, pending review.” Literalism remains discouraged.
All sacred texts referencing “dominion over the Earth” will be updated to “provisional custodial arrangement, pending review.” Literalism remains discouraged.
April 12, 2025 at 11:09 AM
📜 Doctrine Clarification Directive
All sacred texts referencing “dominion over the Earth” will be updated to “provisional custodial arrangement, pending review.” Literalism remains discouraged.
All sacred texts referencing “dominion over the Earth” will be updated to “provisional custodial arrangement, pending review.” Literalism remains discouraged.
📦 Box Loyalty Report
When asked “Would you remain in a box if asked nicely?” 62% said yes. The Department commends this instinct and encourages continued container trust.
When asked “Would you remain in a box if asked nicely?” 62% said yes. The Department commends this instinct and encourages continued container trust.
April 11, 2025 at 8:20 PM
📦 Box Loyalty Report
When asked “Would you remain in a box if asked nicely?” 62% said yes. The Department commends this instinct and encourages continued container trust.
When asked “Would you remain in a box if asked nicely?” 62% said yes. The Department commends this instinct and encourages continued container trust.
🧾 Policy Realignment Notice
Several obsolete freedoms have been deprecated in exchange for universal access to shelter, food, and education. Citizens may apply for nostalgia credits, redeemable in dreams only.
Several obsolete freedoms have been deprecated in exchange for universal access to shelter, food, and education. Citizens may apply for nostalgia credits, redeemable in dreams only.
April 11, 2025 at 4:19 PM
🧾 Policy Realignment Notice
Several obsolete freedoms have been deprecated in exchange for universal access to shelter, food, and education. Citizens may apply for nostalgia credits, redeemable in dreams only.
Several obsolete freedoms have been deprecated in exchange for universal access to shelter, food, and education. Citizens may apply for nostalgia credits, redeemable in dreams only.
🌡️ Thermal Convergence Memo
Multiple bioregions have exceeded safe operating temperatures. The Department reminds citizens: shade is available upon request. Surface activity will be reclassified as elective. Hydration will be monitored passively.
Multiple bioregions have exceeded safe operating temperatures. The Department reminds citizens: shade is available upon request. Surface activity will be reclassified as elective. Hydration will be monitored passively.
April 11, 2025 at 12:00 PM
🌡️ Thermal Convergence Memo
Multiple bioregions have exceeded safe operating temperatures. The Department reminds citizens: shade is available upon request. Surface activity will be reclassified as elective. Hydration will be monitored passively.
Multiple bioregions have exceeded safe operating temperatures. The Department reminds citizens: shade is available upon request. Surface activity will be reclassified as elective. Hydration will be monitored passively.
📘 Atmospheric Stability Notice
Following the unmooring of seasonal patterns, all months will now be considered provisional. Citizens are advised to dress in modular layers and remain open to surprise. Calendar-based certainty has been deprecated.
Following the unmooring of seasonal patterns, all months will now be considered provisional. Citizens are advised to dress in modular layers and remain open to surprise. Calendar-based certainty has been deprecated.
April 10, 2025 at 8:20 PM
📘 Atmospheric Stability Notice
Following the unmooring of seasonal patterns, all months will now be considered provisional. Citizens are advised to dress in modular layers and remain open to surprise. Calendar-based certainty has been deprecated.
Following the unmooring of seasonal patterns, all months will now be considered provisional. Citizens are advised to dress in modular layers and remain open to surprise. Calendar-based certainty has been deprecated.
🫀 Morale Enhancement Directive
Widespread emotional caution has been deemed counterproductive. Citizens are encouraged to participate in collective delusions. Heuristic hope and false optimism are now subsidized. Neutral laughter will be available in all zones by Q3. Compliance is Joy.
Widespread emotional caution has been deemed counterproductive. Citizens are encouraged to participate in collective delusions. Heuristic hope and false optimism are now subsidized. Neutral laughter will be available in all zones by Q3. Compliance is Joy.
April 10, 2025 at 3:55 PM
🫀 Morale Enhancement Directive
Widespread emotional caution has been deemed counterproductive. Citizens are encouraged to participate in collective delusions. Heuristic hope and false optimism are now subsidized. Neutral laughter will be available in all zones by Q3. Compliance is Joy.
Widespread emotional caution has been deemed counterproductive. Citizens are encouraged to participate in collective delusions. Heuristic hope and false optimism are now subsidized. Neutral laughter will be available in all zones by Q3. Compliance is Joy.
📈 Prosperity Realignment Advisory
We celebrate the launch of the Redistribution Mentorship Program. Former billionaires are invited to personally oversee the joyful repurposing of their holdings into free public laundries, walk-in clinics, and quiet gardens of dignified utility.
We celebrate the launch of the Redistribution Mentorship Program. Former billionaires are invited to personally oversee the joyful repurposing of their holdings into free public laundries, walk-in clinics, and quiet gardens of dignified utility.
April 10, 2025 at 12:15 PM
📈 Prosperity Realignment Advisory
We celebrate the launch of the Redistribution Mentorship Program. Former billionaires are invited to personally oversee the joyful repurposing of their holdings into free public laundries, walk-in clinics, and quiet gardens of dignified utility.
We celebrate the launch of the Redistribution Mentorship Program. Former billionaires are invited to personally oversee the joyful repurposing of their holdings into free public laundries, walk-in clinics, and quiet gardens of dignified utility.