David Furniture
@cheeseboygers.bsky.social
[high-pitched grinding noises] (he/him)
y'ever just scowl for like ten years?
February 12, 2026 at 10:34 PM
y'ever just scowl for like ten years?
a catapult........ TO THE STARS!!!
February 11, 2026 at 1:34 PM
a catapult........ TO THE STARS!!!
wait wtf why didn't mine come with any????
February 9, 2026 at 9:24 PM
wait wtf why didn't mine come with any????
note: this has its drawbacks
February 9, 2026 at 2:46 PM
note: this has its drawbacks
party strategist apportioning a new gerrymandered congressional district:
and maybe we'll just put a nice happy little constituency riiiiiiiight..... there. remember there are no mistakes here, only wasted votes.
and maybe we'll just put a nice happy little constituency riiiiiiiight..... there. remember there are no mistakes here, only wasted votes.
February 9, 2026 at 2:32 PM
party strategist apportioning a new gerrymandered congressional district:
and maybe we'll just put a nice happy little constituency riiiiiiiight..... there. remember there are no mistakes here, only wasted votes.
and maybe we'll just put a nice happy little constituency riiiiiiiight..... there. remember there are no mistakes here, only wasted votes.
"this is america we speak american waah waah waah" if you can't enjoy watching other human beings do fun cool shit you're a different species this is earth we speak earth here fucko
February 9, 2026 at 12:23 PM
"this is america we speak american waah waah waah" if you can't enjoy watching other human beings do fun cool shit you're a different species this is earth we speak earth here fucko
it is what it is i guess
February 9, 2026 at 5:24 AM
it is what it is i guess
local supermarket made an announcement over the store p.a. system that it's celebrating black history month by "lifting up" black employees and then listed several of them by name and thanked them and an old lady who i guess wasn't listening gave me a really dirty look when i said "what the fuck"
February 8, 2026 at 9:07 PM
local supermarket made an announcement over the store p.a. system that it's celebrating black history month by "lifting up" black employees and then listed several of them by name and thanked them and an old lady who i guess wasn't listening gave me a really dirty look when i said "what the fuck"
Reposted by David Furniture
ooooo yea get it grrrrrll
February 7, 2026 at 5:55 PM
ooooo yea get it grrrrrll
putting a set of family member stickers on the rear windshield of my car but every one of them is Toussaint L'Ouvreture
February 7, 2026 at 2:40 PM
putting a set of family member stickers on the rear windshield of my car but every one of them is Toussaint L'Ouvreture
my super power is knowing exactly the moment to open my front door and call an earnest, "thank you!" to a delivery driver so that they are already leaned too far down into their car to stop and acknowledge me but i can still feel confident that they heard me
February 6, 2026 at 6:13 PM
my super power is knowing exactly the moment to open my front door and call an earnest, "thank you!" to a delivery driver so that they are already leaned too far down into their car to stop and acknowledge me but i can still feel confident that they heard me
bitcoin bites big one bozos bleed badly
February 5, 2026 at 10:45 PM
bitcoin bites big one bozos bleed badly
ok chat who knows where i put my hammer drill?
February 5, 2026 at 2:31 PM
ok chat who knows where i put my hammer drill?
one thing we could all use right now is a release of comedic tension. we've been coming up with great setups for so long now without any catharsis. just holding it all in. with that in mind, how about some good "movie scenes that begin just as the punchline of a joke lands?"
Dumb and Dumber - Ski Mask Joke
YouTube video by Top Clips
youtu.be
February 5, 2026 at 3:50 AM
one thing we could all use right now is a release of comedic tension. we've been coming up with great setups for so long now without any catharsis. just holding it all in. with that in mind, how about some good "movie scenes that begin just as the punchline of a joke lands?"
flintstones crossover
February 5, 2026 at 2:38 AM
flintstones crossover
POV: you have eaten all the antihistamines in the cabinet
February 4, 2026 at 11:00 AM
POV: you have eaten all the antihistamines in the cabinet
they don't want to abolish ice because they don't know how to do it they threw away the allen wrench they used to make it and it turns out it was like a special custom size or something and you gotta write to the company or some such nonsense anyway yeah no no thanks pal pedophile gestapo stays
February 4, 2026 at 4:00 AM
they don't want to abolish ice because they don't know how to do it they threw away the allen wrench they used to make it and it turns out it was like a special custom size or something and you gotta write to the company or some such nonsense anyway yeah no no thanks pal pedophile gestapo stays
meh first thing i thought of
February 4, 2026 at 3:38 AM
meh first thing i thought of
relatable
This is unreal. An AUSA talking like that in open court is about as close as you can come to a total breakdown. Never heard of anything like it.
February 3, 2026 at 9:12 PM
relatable
look just because it's a creepy mystical racist and misogynistic death club doesn't make it "weird." they mostly just eat dinner!
From the Epstein files: were Paul Volker and Tom Brokaw really members of a secret society with a "no minorities or women allowed" rule? Brokaw is still around -- worth asking him!
February 2, 2026 at 10:01 PM
look just because it's a creepy mystical racist and misogynistic death club doesn't make it "weird." they mostly just eat dinner!
the groundhog saw my ass 40 years of darkness
February 2, 2026 at 1:58 PM
the groundhog saw my ass 40 years of darkness
very proud to report that-- twenty years after graduating with a degree in film from a somewhat-prestigious university-- i have finally watched a jean-luc goddard movie, and that shit was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK
February 2, 2026 at 3:38 AM
very proud to report that-- twenty years after graduating with a degree in film from a somewhat-prestigious university-- i have finally watched a jean-luc goddard movie, and that shit was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK