CBC Pitchbot
@cbcpitchbot.bsky.social
Status-quo propaganda for the average upper-middle class white Canadian. Satirical. Parody account. Not the CBC.
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Canada condemns Canadians bringing humanitarian aid into Gaza
October 2, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Canada condemns Canadians bringing humanitarian aid into Gaza
Canada reaffirms Israel's right to defend itself from Tehran's Children's Hospital, Carney says
June 14, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Canada reaffirms Israel's right to defend itself from Tehran's Children's Hospital, Carney says
PM Carney vows to fight forest fires with US weapons as Liberals increase NATO military spending
June 11, 2025 at 2:19 PM
PM Carney vows to fight forest fires with US weapons as Liberals increase NATO military spending
BREAKING: Canada has denied Elon Musk's political asylum claim.
June 5, 2025 at 9:18 PM
BREAKING: Canada has denied Elon Musk's political asylum claim.
Canada's diplomats in West Bank apologize to Israel for getting shot at by Israeli forces
May 28, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Canada's diplomats in West Bank apologize to Israel for getting shot at by Israeli forces
BREAKING: Pierre Poilievre has now fumbled even greater than previously thought possible
April 29, 2025 at 7:18 AM
BREAKING: Pierre Poilievre has now fumbled even greater than previously thought possible
BREAKING: Pierre Poilievre asks US President Trump for political asylum
April 29, 2025 at 3:25 AM
BREAKING: Pierre Poilievre asks US President Trump for political asylum
BREAKING: Pierre Poilievre successfully completes greatest election fumble in Canadian history
April 29, 2025 at 2:11 AM
BREAKING: Pierre Poilievre successfully completes greatest election fumble in Canadian history
Musk-backed candidate for US Governor looking for upset in Canadian election
April 28, 2025 at 4:19 PM
Musk-backed candidate for US Governor looking for upset in Canadian election
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
Stocks open lower today as markets react to news of JD Vance killing the Pope
April 21, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Stocks open lower today as markets react to news of JD Vance killing the Pope
Carney urges both sides in Gaza to stop committing genocide— both the Israel Airforce and Palestinian children's hospitals
April 21, 2025 at 1:50 PM
Carney urges both sides in Gaza to stop committing genocide— both the Israel Airforce and Palestinian children's hospitals
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
BREAKING: 400 countries in active trade negotiations with the US, trade advisor says
April 15, 2025 at 1:17 PM
BREAKING: 400 countries in active trade negotiations with the US, trade advisor says
BREAKING: Israeli government officially intervenes in Canadian election, publicly backing Conservative election campaign
April 10, 2025 at 9:08 PM
BREAKING: Israeli government officially intervenes in Canadian election, publicly backing Conservative election campaign
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
Stocks up higher after President Trump encourages markets to "BE COOL"
April 9, 2025 at 2:05 PM
Stocks up higher after President Trump encourages markets to "BE COOL"
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
BREAKING: Conservatives begin boycott of stock markets, citing anti-Trump bias
April 8, 2025 at 6:59 PM
BREAKING: Conservatives begin boycott of stock markets, citing anti-Trump bias
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
BREAKING: US-backed President of South Korea Yoon Suk-yeol found guilty in martial law declaration, permanently removed from office
April 4, 2025 at 3:08 AM
BREAKING: US-backed President of South Korea Yoon Suk-yeol found guilty in martial law declaration, permanently removed from office
How each of Canada's parties plan to tackle the housing crisis:
CPC: $10.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
LPC: $12.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
NDP: $12.50 tax credit for first time homebuyers
CPC: $10.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
LPC: $12.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
NDP: $12.50 tax credit for first time homebuyers
March 31, 2025 at 6:21 PM
How each of Canada's parties plan to tackle the housing crisis:
CPC: $10.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
LPC: $12.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
NDP: $12.50 tax credit for first time homebuyers
CPC: $10.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
LPC: $12.00 tax credit for first time homebuyers
NDP: $12.50 tax credit for first time homebuyers
Toronto MP Kevin Vuong will not seek re-election to the Canadian House of Commons, opting to run for the Israeli Knesset instead
March 26, 2025 at 5:44 PM
Toronto MP Kevin Vuong will not seek re-election to the Canadian House of Commons, opting to run for the Israeli Knesset instead
Pierre Poilievre vows to stand up to China as the 51st US State
March 25, 2025 at 2:40 PM
Pierre Poilievre vows to stand up to China as the 51st US State
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
CSIS alleges India organized support for Poilievre’s 2022 Conservative leadership bid
"CSIS did not share this information with Mr. Poilievre...because he does not have the necessary security clearance to access secret documents and receive classified briefings on foreign-interference activities."
"CSIS did not share this information with Mr. Poilievre...because he does not have the necessary security clearance to access secret documents and receive classified briefings on foreign-interference activities."
CSIS alleges India organized support for Poilievre’s 2022 Conservative leadership bid
Agency’s assessment does not point to a highly organized effort or indicate the Conservative leader’s circle knew of the actions, source says
www.theglobeandmail.com
March 25, 2025 at 12:39 PM
CSIS alleges India organized support for Poilievre’s 2022 Conservative leadership bid
"CSIS did not share this information with Mr. Poilievre...because he does not have the necessary security clearance to access secret documents and receive classified briefings on foreign-interference activities."
"CSIS did not share this information with Mr. Poilievre...because he does not have the necessary security clearance to access secret documents and receive classified briefings on foreign-interference activities."
Entire world except United States and Israel interfering in Canadian election, CSIS says
March 25, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Entire world except United States and Israel interfering in Canadian election, CSIS says
“Pierre Poilievre is a strong guy—maybe the strongest guy in Canada— and I don't want to deal with him if I'm being honest. Strong, tough guy.” says President Trump, reading from prepared remarks containing a Conservative Party of Canada letterhead
March 24, 2025 at 2:23 PM
“Pierre Poilievre is a strong guy—maybe the strongest guy in Canada— and I don't want to deal with him if I'm being honest. Strong, tough guy.” says President Trump, reading from prepared remarks containing a Conservative Party of Canada letterhead
Reposted by CBC Pitchbot
Opinion | Not everyone you disagree with is a “Nazi”
March 19, 2025 at 2:09 PM
Opinion | Not everyone you disagree with is a “Nazi”
French President Macron meets with Canadian Prime Minister Macron today
March 17, 2025 at 2:45 PM
French President Macron meets with Canadian Prime Minister Macron today
Progressive Conservative Premier meets with Progressive Conservative Prime Minister
Thanks for the breakfast meeting, Premier Ford — and for standing up for Ontario.
We’ve got a big fight ahead of us, and we’ll be working together every step of the way. We’re strongest when we’re united.
We’ve got a big fight ahead of us, and we’ll be working together every step of the way. We’re strongest when we’re united.
March 12, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Progressive Conservative Premier meets with Progressive Conservative Prime Minister