Bruce Denby
@brucedenby.bsky.social
Scientist. Author. Umlaut conjurer.
Paris, France
Books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B004L2HZWE
Recent articles: https://arxiv.org/pdf/2504.12447
Paris, France
Books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B004L2HZWE
Recent articles: https://arxiv.org/pdf/2504.12447
How to tell when penne rigate are cooked? It's when they stand up vertically in the pan like a gaggle of tubeworms!!
January 28, 2026 at 12:17 PM
How to tell when penne rigate are cooked? It's when they stand up vertically in the pan like a gaggle of tubeworms!!
What fixes tempo temporarily rarely fixes temper airily.
January 28, 2026 at 12:02 PM
What fixes tempo temporarily rarely fixes temper airily.
Anyone who's ever been mooned knows what a sickening and unsettling experience it can be. Take heart, at least, though, that you don't live on Saturn, for it has 274 moons!!
January 28, 2026 at 11:26 AM
Anyone who's ever been mooned knows what a sickening and unsettling experience it can be. Take heart, at least, though, that you don't live on Saturn, for it has 274 moons!!
Hey replicant, would you mind getting off the shoulder of Orion, you're blocking my view! Thanks.
January 28, 2026 at 11:09 AM
Hey replicant, would you mind getting off the shoulder of Orion, you're blocking my view! Thanks.
Breaking - Following worldwide condemnation of the barbarity of Singapore's caning of convicted criminals, such sentences will henceforth be carried out using sugar cane as the implement of punishment, state government announces.
January 28, 2026 at 9:52 AM
Breaking - Following worldwide condemnation of the barbarity of Singapore's caning of convicted criminals, such sentences will henceforth be carried out using sugar cane as the implement of punishment, state government announces.
Eleven years ago today:
"I've got the mind of a six year old!" cackled Mudwelt, "right here on this little USB stick!"
"I've got the mind of a six year old!" cackled Mudwelt, "right here on this little USB stick!"
January 28, 2026 at 9:37 AM
Eleven years ago today:
"I've got the mind of a six year old!" cackled Mudwelt, "right here on this little USB stick!"
"I've got the mind of a six year old!" cackled Mudwelt, "right here on this little USB stick!"
Anyone who's ever been mooned knows what a sickening and unsettling experience it can be. Take heart, at least, though, that you don't live on Saturn, for it has 274 moons!!
January 28, 2026 at 9:33 AM
Anyone who's ever been mooned knows what a sickening and unsettling experience it can be. Take heart, at least, though, that you don't live on Saturn, for it has 274 moons!!
Most mornings, Chervil shook crumbs from a little red tablecloth out the window of his flat. A mllions miles away, Curvacean Scouts on Titan took the fervent agitations of a single scarlet pixel as a sign of aggression, and had for decades been preparing for full out nuclear war.
January 28, 2026 at 9:27 AM
Most mornings, Chervil shook crumbs from a little red tablecloth out the window of his flat. A mllions miles away, Curvacean Scouts on Titan took the fervent agitations of a single scarlet pixel as a sign of aggression, and had for decades been preparing for full out nuclear war.
Good news, if they're dragging out Melania to calm things down, they must really know they fucked up!!
January 27, 2026 at 6:43 PM
Good news, if they're dragging out Melania to calm things down, they must really know they fucked up!!
A MAGA chant for Scott Bessent, Kristi Noem, Karoline Leavitt, and little donnie:
Just gonna stand there and hear us cry?
Well, that's alright because we love the way you lie
We love the way you lie
Just gonna stand there and hear us cry?
Well, that's alright because we love the way you lie
We love the way you lie
January 27, 2026 at 5:27 PM
A MAGA chant for Scott Bessent, Kristi Noem, Karoline Leavitt, and little donnie:
Just gonna stand there and hear us cry?
Well, that's alright because we love the way you lie
We love the way you lie
Just gonna stand there and hear us cry?
Well, that's alright because we love the way you lie
We love the way you lie
People stop and stare
That's lobotomy
Yes I've had my c'rebral cortex
Ripped right outta me
So as time goes by
I'll be glad if I
Can remember the street where I live!!!!
That's lobotomy
Yes I've had my c'rebral cortex
Ripped right outta me
So as time goes by
I'll be glad if I
Can remember the street where I live!!!!
January 26, 2026 at 6:12 PM
People stop and stare
That's lobotomy
Yes I've had my c'rebral cortex
Ripped right outta me
So as time goes by
I'll be glad if I
Can remember the street where I live!!!!
That's lobotomy
Yes I've had my c'rebral cortex
Ripped right outta me
So as time goes by
I'll be glad if I
Can remember the street where I live!!!!
Yes, this is the getaway car. So get away from the car.
January 26, 2026 at 4:10 PM
Yes, this is the getaway car. So get away from the car.
"I'm afraid they stuck to their guns," explained the Color Sergeant. "They'd been eating barbecue with their hands, you see, and were unable to break free. Sadly, none survived."
January 26, 2026 at 3:19 PM
"I'm afraid they stuck to their guns," explained the Color Sergeant. "They'd been eating barbecue with their hands, you see, and were unable to break free. Sadly, none survived."
When I developed a cataract in my left eye, I had to keep telling my right eye, c'mon take it easy, you're seeing for two now.
January 26, 2026 at 12:47 PM
When I developed a cataract in my left eye, I had to keep telling my right eye, c'mon take it easy, you're seeing for two now.
The flight of birds has always seemed remarkable to mankind, their gravity defying trajectories appearing at times next to impossible. It is only when we remember that birds are actually extant dinosaurs that their exploits once again become understandable and reasonable to us.
January 26, 2026 at 12:12 PM
The flight of birds has always seemed remarkable to mankind, their gravity defying trajectories appearing at times next to impossible. It is only when we remember that birds are actually extant dinosaurs that their exploits once again become understandable and reasonable to us.
Just when you thought it couldn't get any more depressing, China recalled the pandas it gifted Japan years ago. Japan without pandas!! C'est le monde à l'envers !!
January 26, 2026 at 11:55 AM
Just when you thought it couldn't get any more depressing, China recalled the pandas it gifted Japan years ago. Japan without pandas!! C'est le monde à l'envers !!
Ten? Nein.
Eight's heaven.
Sick's five.
For three, two won.
Eight's heaven.
Sick's five.
For three, two won.
January 26, 2026 at 8:55 AM
Ten? Nein.
Eight's heaven.
Sick's five.
For three, two won.
Eight's heaven.
Sick's five.
For three, two won.
Breaking - Canada merges with China to form new nation of Chinada. Form of government to be "communism with a happy face" 🙂🥶🧚♀️!!
January 26, 2026 at 8:40 AM
Breaking - Canada merges with China to form new nation of Chinada. Form of government to be "communism with a happy face" 🙂🥶🧚♀️!!
Most spectre girls dreamed of rearing children, but Berda didn't like children, and spent her time rearing her ugly head.
January 26, 2026 at 7:14 AM
Most spectre girls dreamed of rearing children, but Berda didn't like children, and spent her time rearing her ugly head.
NowWatching - A Quantum of Chicken, starring Billy Bob Thornton and Courtney Love!!
January 25, 2026 at 1:22 PM
NowWatching - A Quantum of Chicken, starring Billy Bob Thornton and Courtney Love!!
ICE - Imagineering and Cuff'em Enforcement
January 25, 2026 at 9:47 AM
ICE - Imagineering and Cuff'em Enforcement
DidYouKnow - Kristi Noem's original birth name was Pantsonfire? You can google it!!
January 25, 2026 at 9:41 AM
DidYouKnow - Kristi Noem's original birth name was Pantsonfire? You can google it!!
Eleven years ago today:
Like your beef jerky? Step up to Staggering Cow™ seasoned meat products!
Like your beef jerky? Step up to Staggering Cow™ seasoned meat products!
January 25, 2026 at 9:31 AM
Eleven years ago today:
Like your beef jerky? Step up to Staggering Cow™ seasoned meat products!
Like your beef jerky? Step up to Staggering Cow™ seasoned meat products!