Barb Sobel
@barbsobel.bsky.social
Drink coffee, herd cats, write the thing, burn it all down, be kind. GenX. Widow. Firstmother. NJ.
https://barbsobel.substack.com
https://barbsobel.substack.com
Pinned
Barb Sobel
@barbsobel.bsky.social
· Nov 12
Really, 2024 has been all about making friends with my neighborhood opossums. This is Lou.
Reposted by Barb Sobel
after millions of views and shares of my Portland Frog art. (thank you all🙏🏾) I got requests to highlight priests, and chickens, and Chicagoans, and T-Rexes, and more… all of us who refuse to bend the knee. so this is for US.
𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚃𝚊𝚕𝚕.
𝚆𝚎 𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚆𝚒𝚗.
𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚃𝚊𝚕𝚕.
𝚆𝚎 𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚆𝚒𝚗.
October 10, 2025 at 9:11 PM
after millions of views and shares of my Portland Frog art. (thank you all🙏🏾) I got requests to highlight priests, and chickens, and Chicagoans, and T-Rexes, and more… all of us who refuse to bend the knee. so this is for US.
𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚃𝚊𝚕𝚕.
𝚆𝚎 𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚆𝚒𝚗.
𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚃𝚊𝚕𝚕.
𝚆𝚎 𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚆𝚒𝚗.
As a firstmother in an open adoption:
The agency touted it as a “win win win”. “Keep in touch with your baby!” their ad in the yellow pages sang. “Adoption - the loving option”.
Openness is not legally binding.
The grief & guilt nearly killed me.
The agency touted it as a “win win win”. “Keep in touch with your baby!” their ad in the yellow pages sang. “Adoption - the loving option”.
Openness is not legally binding.
The grief & guilt nearly killed me.
Many birth mothers who choose open adoption hope to maintain a relationship with their child. But when contact agreements are breached, @nicolechung.bsky.social reports, they sometimes have little recourse.
When Adoption Promises Are Broken
Many birth mothers hope to maintain contact with their child. But their agreements with adoptive parents can be fragile.
bit.ly
October 10, 2025 at 10:13 AM
As a firstmother in an open adoption:
The agency touted it as a “win win win”. “Keep in touch with your baby!” their ad in the yellow pages sang. “Adoption - the loving option”.
Openness is not legally binding.
The grief & guilt nearly killed me.
The agency touted it as a “win win win”. “Keep in touch with your baby!” their ad in the yellow pages sang. “Adoption - the loving option”.
Openness is not legally binding.
The grief & guilt nearly killed me.
Reposted by Barb Sobel
Have we done like Read Ats yet? Like you bring things to READ AT ICE agents & other cops at these protests & actions? Could do something classic like The Constitution or 1984, but something really funny, or artful, or smutty as a kind of dissonance might be cool. Like imagine...
October 10, 2025 at 3:39 AM
Have we done like Read Ats yet? Like you bring things to READ AT ICE agents & other cops at these protests & actions? Could do something classic like The Constitution or 1984, but something really funny, or artful, or smutty as a kind of dissonance might be cool. Like imagine...
Reposted by Barb Sobel
Early this morning I went to Rotary Park and spread my portion of Chris’ ashes beneath our favorite tree.
It was anticlimactic.
I miss my best friend. But I am grateful that we belonged to each other for as long as we did.
Today marks 2 years since he left this timeline.
It was anticlimactic.
I miss my best friend. But I am grateful that we belonged to each other for as long as we did.
Today marks 2 years since he left this timeline.
May 2, 2025 at 12:52 PM
Early this morning I went to Rotary Park and spread my portion of Chris’ ashes beneath our favorite tree.
It was anticlimactic.
I miss my best friend. But I am grateful that we belonged to each other for as long as we did.
Today marks 2 years since he left this timeline.
It was anticlimactic.
I miss my best friend. But I am grateful that we belonged to each other for as long as we did.
Today marks 2 years since he left this timeline.
March 17, 2025 at 6:51 PM
Writing, writing and writing. For the first time in 8 months, I feel I’m getting somewhere. Need to keep the momentum.
January 16, 2025 at 12:47 PM
Writing, writing and writing. For the first time in 8 months, I feel I’m getting somewhere. Need to keep the momentum.
I ran into some acquaintances over the weekend who didn’t know Chris died. It’s awkward at this stage, 20 months later.
Like “Oh hey, how’s it going? I’m doing well, thanks. Chris? Not so much.”
I always feel terrible having to relay the news.
#widow
Like “Oh hey, how’s it going? I’m doing well, thanks. Chris? Not so much.”
I always feel terrible having to relay the news.
#widow
January 5, 2025 at 11:07 AM
I ran into some acquaintances over the weekend who didn’t know Chris died. It’s awkward at this stage, 20 months later.
Like “Oh hey, how’s it going? I’m doing well, thanks. Chris? Not so much.”
I always feel terrible having to relay the news.
#widow
Like “Oh hey, how’s it going? I’m doing well, thanks. Chris? Not so much.”
I always feel terrible having to relay the news.
#widow
May the Winter Solstice set your intentions for brighter days. Happy Yule.
December 21, 2024 at 10:34 AM
May the Winter Solstice set your intentions for brighter days. Happy Yule.
Last night’s sunset over the strip mall.
November 29, 2024 at 11:06 AM
Last night’s sunset over the strip mall.
How many pots of coffee are required before family dinner? I’m working on pot 2 but somehow it doesn’t seem enough.
November 28, 2024 at 6:20 PM
How many pots of coffee are required before family dinner? I’m working on pot 2 but somehow it doesn’t seem enough.
Unbeknownst to her, I heard one of Chris’ former employers talk about him. She was sweet and approving of his performance, which she wasn’t when he worked for her. Then she discovered he died. I felt nothing, except knowing he’d be pissed off with the long overdue accolades. It was weird. #widow
November 27, 2024 at 10:52 AM
Unbeknownst to her, I heard one of Chris’ former employers talk about him. She was sweet and approving of his performance, which she wasn’t when he worked for her. Then she discovered he died. I felt nothing, except knowing he’d be pissed off with the long overdue accolades. It was weird. #widow
I can’t wait to have my second cup of coffee on Thanksgiving morning and celebrate my favorite tradition
November 26, 2024 at 6:03 PM
I can’t wait to have my second cup of coffee on Thanksgiving morning and celebrate my favorite tradition
I think about this often.
Nietzsche: Love your FATE
In his book The Gay Science, Nietzsche delivers a profound thought experiment that forces us to ponder the possibility that all events in life—every moment, decision, and experience—repeat infinitely,...
open.substack.com
November 25, 2024 at 2:04 PM
I think about this often.
I recently deleted my account “over there”. Looked at my last post. I took this photo with some others for the “home clipboard” of notes, photos and ephemera when he was in the induced coma. He’d live for six weeks after this day. Was weird to see. #Widow
November 25, 2024 at 1:50 PM
I recently deleted my account “over there”. Looked at my last post. I took this photo with some others for the “home clipboard” of notes, photos and ephemera when he was in the induced coma. He’d live for six weeks after this day. Was weird to see. #Widow
The anticipation is palpable.
im actually really looking forward to my spotify wrapped this year cause i had a bunch of obsessive song phases and i wanna know which one won
November 25, 2024 at 8:33 AM
The anticipation is palpable.
Reposted by Barb Sobel
Elon Musk runs on 100% renewable narcissism.
November 25, 2024 at 2:38 AM
Elon Musk runs on 100% renewable narcissism.
I told myself to spend yesterday doing something I love and keep out of my head. It didn’t work. I finished this project and hated the way it was completed. I’ll rip it apart and start again. That’s what I do. Rip and start again.
November 23, 2024 at 1:12 PM
I told myself to spend yesterday doing something I love and keep out of my head. It didn’t work. I finished this project and hated the way it was completed. I’ll rip it apart and start again. That’s what I do. Rip and start again.
If you’re not following, you’re missing on one of my favorite artists.
November 23, 2024 at 1:09 PM
If you’re not following, you’re missing on one of my favorite artists.
I possess the remarkable skill of nodding off with half a cup of coffee in my hand. And not spilling.
November 22, 2024 at 2:02 PM
I possess the remarkable skill of nodding off with half a cup of coffee in my hand. And not spilling.
This. With little to no support and a ticking time bomb in my belly, I did what everyone said was “the right thing”. The grief and sorrow nearly killed me. The adoption system needs reform on many levels.
msmagazine.com/2024/11/20/a...
msmagazine.com/2024/11/20/a...
Is Adoption Reform a Missing Element in the Fight for Reproductive Justice? - Ms. Magazine
Is Adoption Reform a Missing Element in the Fight for Reproductive Justice? Roughly 20,000 women relinquish a child every year.
msmagazine.com
November 21, 2024 at 12:56 PM
This. With little to no support and a ticking time bomb in my belly, I did what everyone said was “the right thing”. The grief and sorrow nearly killed me. The adoption system needs reform on many levels.
msmagazine.com/2024/11/20/a...
msmagazine.com/2024/11/20/a...
I’ll continue to bust out this sign again and again and again. #ReproductiveRights
November 15, 2024 at 9:03 AM
I’ll continue to bust out this sign again and again and again. #ReproductiveRights
Reposted by Barb Sobel
The monsters under your bed aren't all evil, some of them are just to make sure you're doing okay
November 12, 2024 at 1:19 AM
The monsters under your bed aren't all evil, some of them are just to make sure you're doing okay