Austin Evans
@austinjev.bsky.social
🦡, ⚾️, 🏀, 🏖️, 💜, 🍻, 🦌, 📊, 🚢, 🏰, 🏈, 🥍, ⚖️, 🧀, ✊, 🐶, ⚜, 🌅, 🏊♂️ & 🇺🇸.
53058 > 92103
he/him/his
53058 > 92103
he/him/his
The State of College GameDay is kinda sad… over 400 miles from the 1 vs. 2 game, the 1 vs. 3 Heisman candidates and—to boot?—it’s indoors. #ESECPN
December 6, 2025 at 2:30 PM
The State of College GameDay is kinda sad… over 400 miles from the 1 vs. 2 game, the 1 vs. 3 Heisman candidates and—to boot?—it’s indoors. #ESECPN
Reposted by Austin Evans
thank fuck i can stop rooting for the cowboys
that felt awful
that felt awful
November 28, 2025 at 1:00 AM
thank fuck i can stop rooting for the cowboys
that felt awful
that felt awful
October 18, 2025 at 2:38 AM
Really hate that BA has to call this shit. #Brewers #ThisIsMyCrew
October 17, 2025 at 12:59 AM
Really hate that BA has to call this shit. #Brewers #ThisIsMyCrew
Reposted by Austin Evans
Kid Rock: I will no longer sell my music in California.
Scott Baio: I will no longer act in California.
Governor Newsom: My policies are working.
Scott Baio: I will no longer act in California.
Governor Newsom: My policies are working.
August 24, 2025 at 2:53 PM
Kid Rock: I will no longer sell my music in California.
Scott Baio: I will no longer act in California.
Governor Newsom: My policies are working.
Scott Baio: I will no longer act in California.
Governor Newsom: My policies are working.
That ump owes an entire city some burgers tomorrow.
July 23, 2025 at 4:19 AM
That ump owes an entire city some burgers tomorrow.
The the angels angels of Anaheim.
Sometimes when we borrow words from other languages, English can become delightfully redundant.
April 2, 2025 at 2:14 PM
The the angels angels of Anaheim.
The ultimate April fool.
April 2, 2025 at 3:20 AM
The ultimate April fool.
Wordle 1,331 2/6* 💁♂️
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
February 10, 2025 at 7:06 AM
Wordle 1,331 2/6* 💁♂️
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Kevin and Tom need to hit the comedy circuit after this game. 🙄
January 12, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Kevin and Tom need to hit the comedy circuit after this game. 🙄
Reposted by Austin Evans
Seeds 7 vs 8 for the national championship.
The Magnificent Mid.
Even without the conference byes, both teams wouldn't have been in the 4-team playoff as No. 5 & 6.
The 12-Team #CFBPlayoff let these teams actually earn it.
The Magnificent Mid.
Even without the conference byes, both teams wouldn't have been in the 4-team playoff as No. 5 & 6.
The 12-Team #CFBPlayoff let these teams actually earn it.
January 11, 2025 at 4:28 AM
Seeds 7 vs 8 for the national championship.
The Magnificent Mid.
Even without the conference byes, both teams wouldn't have been in the 4-team playoff as No. 5 & 6.
The 12-Team #CFBPlayoff let these teams actually earn it.
The Magnificent Mid.
Even without the conference byes, both teams wouldn't have been in the 4-team playoff as No. 5 & 6.
The 12-Team #CFBPlayoff let these teams actually earn it.
Can’t sleep; here’s the NFL seeding scenarios…
AFC:
1st seed KC 🔒
2nd seed BUF 🔒
3rd seed BAL 🔒
4th seed HOU 🔒
5th/6th seed…
LAC w/ W (PIT to 6th seed)
PIT w/ LAC L (LAC to 6th seed)
7th seed…
DEN w/ W (MIA & CIN out)
MIA w/ W & DEN L (DEN & CIN out)
CIN w/ DEN L & MIA L (DEN & MIA out)
AFC:
1st seed KC 🔒
2nd seed BUF 🔒
3rd seed BAL 🔒
4th seed HOU 🔒
5th/6th seed…
LAC w/ W (PIT to 6th seed)
PIT w/ LAC L (LAC to 6th seed)
7th seed…
DEN w/ W (MIA & CIN out)
MIA w/ W & DEN L (DEN & CIN out)
CIN w/ DEN L & MIA L (DEN & MIA out)
January 5, 2025 at 10:10 AM
Can’t sleep; here’s the NFL seeding scenarios…
AFC:
1st seed KC 🔒
2nd seed BUF 🔒
3rd seed BAL 🔒
4th seed HOU 🔒
5th/6th seed…
LAC w/ W (PIT to 6th seed)
PIT w/ LAC L (LAC to 6th seed)
7th seed…
DEN w/ W (MIA & CIN out)
MIA w/ W & DEN L (DEN & CIN out)
CIN w/ DEN L & MIA L (DEN & MIA out)
AFC:
1st seed KC 🔒
2nd seed BUF 🔒
3rd seed BAL 🔒
4th seed HOU 🔒
5th/6th seed…
LAC w/ W (PIT to 6th seed)
PIT w/ LAC L (LAC to 6th seed)
7th seed…
DEN w/ W (MIA & CIN out)
MIA w/ W & DEN L (DEN & CIN out)
CIN w/ DEN L & MIA L (DEN & MIA out)
If you start the Eras Tour on Disney+ at 9:51:19pm exactly, she yells “Midnight!” from Style right at 12:00:00.
January 1, 2025 at 5:22 AM
If you start the Eras Tour on Disney+ at 9:51:19pm exactly, she yells “Midnight!” from Style right at 12:00:00.
Still carrying it. @cheeseheadtv.bsky.social
December 30, 2024 at 1:04 AM
Still carrying it. @cheeseheadtv.bsky.social
College athlete transfers saying they’ve “committed” to their new school…
December 27, 2024 at 7:13 PM
College athlete transfers saying they’ve “committed” to their new school…
At least they’re paying him in Kohl’s Cash.
December 21, 2024 at 6:41 PM
At least they’re paying him in Kohl’s Cash.
This Seattle bar is gonna regret this Jordan Love-coded bathroom. #iykyk cc: @aaronnagler.bsky.social @minakimes.bsky.social
December 15, 2024 at 9:53 PM
This Seattle bar is gonna regret this Jordan Love-coded bathroom. #iykyk cc: @aaronnagler.bsky.social @minakimes.bsky.social
This. I was incredibly selective on which Twitter account follows made their way here.
i keep seeing people say that this app is becoming toxic like twitter but it may just be who you’re interacting with i fear. if you follow a bunch of people who are doing what you disliked on twitter then of course it’ll be the same lol
December 5, 2024 at 4:32 AM
This. I was incredibly selective on which Twitter account follows made their way here.
I have a joke about res ipsa loquitur, but it should be pretty obvious.
I have a joke about ipse dixit, but you'll have to take my word for it.
I have a joke about contra proferentem, please don’t hold it against me
December 4, 2024 at 5:50 PM
I have a joke about res ipsa loquitur, but it should be pretty obvious.