You'll be happy you did
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She gagged.
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I used to have an addiction to dirt
But I've now been clean for over a year
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Have you heard the joke about my penis?
Nevermind, no one ever gets it.
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You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes...
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Why was 6 afraid of 7 in hexadecimal Canada?
Because 7 8 9 A.
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What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
You only need one nail to hang a picture! Happy Easter!
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When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves you and never comes back.
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If you ever need help learning C++, I can give you some pointers.
And you can keep me as a reference.
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Who is the king of the pencil case?
The Ruler
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David was hard at work...
it was really quite awkward for his coworkers.
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Why did the photon stop drinking after traveling 670 million miles?
because Happy Hour ended.
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As Dumbledore stood there stroking his wand
Harry regretted transferring to Catholic School
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Leather jackets are great for sneaking up on people.
They're made of hide.
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How does the devil measure his drugs?
In pentagrams
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What does Bill Clinton tell Hillary after sex?
I'll be home in 45 min.
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Pickup line: Hey girl, did I take a loan from you?
Because my interest in you keeps growing.
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Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today.
They left a note on the windscreen. It said, "Parking fine", so that was nice.
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A little boy went up to his father and asked, “Dad, where did my intelligence come from?”
His father replied, “well, son, you probably got it from your mom, because I still have mine.”
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Lately I've gotten into donkey porn...
...it really gets MEEE OFFFFF!
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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run like hell cause she's got a nade in her mouth!
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Samsung Gn7 user here. despite all the abuse they're getting I was surprised that it's actually a really great phone
I mean the battery life alone just blew me away
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How many vegans does it take to eat a bacon cheeseburger?
One if nobody's looking.
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Scientists have reversed Global Warming!
Get rekt, Sun!
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