Abraham Piper
@abrahampiper.bsky.social
Language, factoids, pseudo-intellectualism, and sacrilege.
In the same way that “you aren’t stuck in traffic, you are traffic,” you can’t owe or pay a debt to society. You are society.
January 7, 2025 at 12:02 PM
In the same way that “you aren’t stuck in traffic, you are traffic,” you can’t owe or pay a debt to society. You are society.
I’m not always the best at counterfactuals, but something I 100% know I wouldn’t do if I were in your shoes is go barefoot.
December 31, 2024 at 2:49 PM
I’m not always the best at counterfactuals, but something I 100% know I wouldn’t do if I were in your shoes is go barefoot.
I have no idea what I mean by this, but December 26 doesn’t feel like a real day.
December 26, 2024 at 10:51 PM
I have no idea what I mean by this, but December 26 doesn’t feel like a real day.
The your-wife-should-have-stuff-in-her-stocking-too discourse on threads today enlightened me to the fact there are adults with stockings.
I had no idea that was a thing.
I’ve never put anything in my wife’s stocking, because, as The Ladies’ Man said about his car, her stocking…doesn’t exist.
I had no idea that was a thing.
I’ve never put anything in my wife’s stocking, because, as The Ladies’ Man said about his car, her stocking…doesn’t exist.
December 25, 2024 at 9:13 PM
The your-wife-should-have-stuff-in-her-stocking-too discourse on threads today enlightened me to the fact there are adults with stockings.
I had no idea that was a thing.
I’ve never put anything in my wife’s stocking, because, as The Ladies’ Man said about his car, her stocking…doesn’t exist.
I had no idea that was a thing.
I’ve never put anything in my wife’s stocking, because, as The Ladies’ Man said about his car, her stocking…doesn’t exist.
But…but…isn’t that second sentence a hypothetical??
December 20, 2024 at 3:39 PM
But…but…isn’t that second sentence a hypothetical??
Some backyard shenanigans now that we finally have snow.
December 20, 2024 at 2:23 AM
Some backyard shenanigans now that we finally have snow.
✨10 Words That People Who Learn Everything From Reading Say…Interestingly✨
1. Misled
2. Epitome
3. Quinoa
4. Cache
5. Worcestershire
6. Hyperbole
7. Albeit
8. Debris
9. Awry
and
10. Voila! The list is done.
Come along for more if you feel like it. 😆👋
1. Misled
2. Epitome
3. Quinoa
4. Cache
5. Worcestershire
6. Hyperbole
7. Albeit
8. Debris
9. Awry
and
10. Voila! The list is done.
Come along for more if you feel like it. 😆👋
December 19, 2024 at 3:03 PM
✨10 Words That People Who Learn Everything From Reading Say…Interestingly✨
1. Misled
2. Epitome
3. Quinoa
4. Cache
5. Worcestershire
6. Hyperbole
7. Albeit
8. Debris
9. Awry
and
10. Voila! The list is done.
Come along for more if you feel like it. 😆👋
1. Misled
2. Epitome
3. Quinoa
4. Cache
5. Worcestershire
6. Hyperbole
7. Albeit
8. Debris
9. Awry
and
10. Voila! The list is done.
Come along for more if you feel like it. 😆👋
A broken clock is wrong 86,398 times a day.
December 19, 2024 at 3:07 AM
A broken clock is wrong 86,398 times a day.
A post came across my feed that said “Jesus died on the cross for you. Isn’t that enough?”
Of course, the question comes to mind — “Enough for what?” (1/3)
Of course, the question comes to mind — “Enough for what?” (1/3)
December 18, 2024 at 10:50 PM
A post came across my feed that said “Jesus died on the cross for you. Isn’t that enough?”
Of course, the question comes to mind — “Enough for what?” (1/3)
Of course, the question comes to mind — “Enough for what?” (1/3)
I don’t take Jesus that seriously, but at least I admit it. 🤷♀️
I don’t think I know of anybody who takes him very seriously apart from where his reported words and actions align with what they believe anyway.
I don’t think I know of anybody who takes him very seriously apart from where his reported words and actions align with what they believe anyway.
December 12, 2024 at 2:38 PM
I don’t take Jesus that seriously, but at least I admit it. 🤷♀️
I don’t think I know of anybody who takes him very seriously apart from where his reported words and actions align with what they believe anyway.
I don’t think I know of anybody who takes him very seriously apart from where his reported words and actions align with what they believe anyway.
Saw someone complaining about how their memory foam mattress has permanent indentations. Sounds like maybe they actually wanted a dementia foam mattress.
December 12, 2024 at 5:07 AM
Saw someone complaining about how their memory foam mattress has permanent indentations. Sounds like maybe they actually wanted a dementia foam mattress.
Apparently, I decided to include a review from my son when I froze tonight’s dinner a few months ago.
December 3, 2024 at 1:31 AM
Apparently, I decided to include a review from my son when I froze tonight’s dinner a few months ago.
The people with dramatically strong opinions about cyber trucks are going to be one of the main reasons it goes down in history.
December 1, 2024 at 10:20 PM
The people with dramatically strong opinions about cyber trucks are going to be one of the main reasons it goes down in history.
One reason to try to get rich is to reduce your chances of having to go to heaven.
December 1, 2024 at 3:58 PM
One reason to try to get rich is to reduce your chances of having to go to heaven.
I picked up some combat boots yesterday... There’s a date on them: August, 1966. And a name: Martin M. G—.
It took about 10 seconds to find him. He’s 79 and lives 11 miles from me.
Am I going to do anything with this information? Not practically, no. But I do like a boot with an ethos…
It took about 10 seconds to find him. He’s 79 and lives 11 miles from me.
Am I going to do anything with this information? Not practically, no. But I do like a boot with an ethos…
November 26, 2024 at 1:56 AM
I picked up some combat boots yesterday... There’s a date on them: August, 1966. And a name: Martin M. G—.
It took about 10 seconds to find him. He’s 79 and lives 11 miles from me.
Am I going to do anything with this information? Not practically, no. But I do like a boot with an ethos…
It took about 10 seconds to find him. He’s 79 and lives 11 miles from me.
Am I going to do anything with this information? Not practically, no. But I do like a boot with an ethos…
The dog’s shampoo says it was not tested on animals, but, like, surely it was at SOME point.
November 23, 2024 at 5:51 PM
The dog’s shampoo says it was not tested on animals, but, like, surely it was at SOME point.
Our family is divided in today’s contest. Pray for us.
November 23, 2024 at 3:30 PM
Our family is divided in today’s contest. Pray for us.
Not to be over serious about it on a Saturday morning, but in this sense, language purism is a bit like a belief in moral responsibility. 🤔 (1/…)
Language purists don’t actually have anything pure to preserve. They just prefer the previous contaminants.
November 23, 2024 at 2:58 PM
Not to be over serious about it on a Saturday morning, but in this sense, language purism is a bit like a belief in moral responsibility. 🤔 (1/…)
Language purists don’t actually have anything pure to preserve. They just prefer the previous contaminants.
November 23, 2024 at 2:30 PM
Language purists don’t actually have anything pure to preserve. They just prefer the previous contaminants.
Is “irregardless” a double negative?
Is it nonsense because it means “not regardless”?
No and no.
And for a pretty interesting reason, too (if you’re an abject nerd):
Is it nonsense because it means “not regardless”?
No and no.
And for a pretty interesting reason, too (if you’re an abject nerd):
November 22, 2024 at 1:42 PM
Is “irregardless” a double negative?
Is it nonsense because it means “not regardless”?
No and no.
And for a pretty interesting reason, too (if you’re an abject nerd):
Is it nonsense because it means “not regardless”?
No and no.
And for a pretty interesting reason, too (if you’re an abject nerd):
From one perspective, Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. From another perspective, Jesus made Lazarus die twice.
November 20, 2024 at 10:54 PM
From one perspective, Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. From another perspective, Jesus made Lazarus die twice.
If you follow me, you follow Budget, too. So, you know, come along if you feel like it. 🤷♀️👋😼
November 20, 2024 at 7:11 PM
If you follow me, you follow Budget, too. So, you know, come along if you feel like it. 🤷♀️👋😼
I saw this “self-help” book at a vintage shop and #8 from his list of 20 made me chuckle.
November 20, 2024 at 2:42 PM
I saw this “self-help” book at a vintage shop and #8 from his list of 20 made me chuckle.
To quote Tim Minchin…
Do you know what they call alternative medicine that’s been proved to work?
Medicine.
Do you know what they call alternative medicine that’s been proved to work?
Medicine.
November 20, 2024 at 2:13 PM
To quote Tim Minchin…
Do you know what they call alternative medicine that’s been proved to work?
Medicine.
Do you know what they call alternative medicine that’s been proved to work?
Medicine.
Guess what the word for breasts was in the 1300s when John Wycliffe was translating some biblical erotica into our burgeoning language. (1/…)
November 19, 2024 at 6:59 PM
Guess what the word for breasts was in the 1300s when John Wycliffe was translating some biblical erotica into our burgeoning language. (1/…)