Aaron P
@aaronpallan.bsky.social
Horror-lover 🦇, stationery-hoarder 🖋️, tea-swiller 🫖. A mostly harmless and generally convivial Canadian queer 🇨🇦 🏳️🌈. Friend to all felines. A little weird, but always SFW. (He/Him).
tea_and_ink on Insta 📸
aaronpallan on Discord
tea_and_ink on Insta 📸
aaronpallan on Discord
Pinned
Drop an alien that’s not from Star Wars or Star Trek.
January 24, 2026 at 12:17 AM
Drop an alien that’s not from Star Wars or Star Trek.
I ended the workday on a high note. (A client actually followed the advice they paid me for. Can you believe it ‽)
January 21, 2026 at 11:37 PM
I ended the workday on a high note. (A client actually followed the advice they paid me for. Can you believe it ‽)
Only a French president could look like he’s directing a fashion runway rather than suffering an eye infection. 👏 🇫🇷
January 20, 2026 at 4:13 PM
Only a French president could look like he’s directing a fashion runway rather than suffering an eye infection. 👏 🇫🇷
I don’t seem to have a single picture of myself from 2016. Instead, have this photo of @shaenadean.bsky.social and me from 17 years ago.
January 20, 2026 at 2:43 PM
I don’t seem to have a single picture of myself from 2016. Instead, have this photo of @shaenadean.bsky.social and me from 17 years ago.
Sometimes, I think I should be more social and outgoing.
Then I remember that would involve expending a tremendous amount of energy fooling people that I was actually for the company or being extremely vulnerable (and extra) and unmasking.
Conundrums, conundrums.
Then I remember that would involve expending a tremendous amount of energy fooling people that I was actually for the company or being extremely vulnerable (and extra) and unmasking.
Conundrums, conundrums.
January 18, 2026 at 4:59 AM
Sometimes, I think I should be more social and outgoing.
Then I remember that would involve expending a tremendous amount of energy fooling people that I was actually for the company or being extremely vulnerable (and extra) and unmasking.
Conundrums, conundrums.
Then I remember that would involve expending a tremendous amount of energy fooling people that I was actually for the company or being extremely vulnerable (and extra) and unmasking.
Conundrums, conundrums.
Made pies recreationally.
January 18, 2026 at 12:03 AM
Made pies recreationally.
This little guy opened up this morning.
January 17, 2026 at 6:55 PM
This little guy opened up this morning.
The best way to handle a poor night’s sleep is to drink so many caffeinated drinks that your heart skips a beat.
a woman with a surprised look on her face behind the words obviously
Alt: a woman with a surprised look on her face behind the words obviously
media.tenor.com
January 17, 2026 at 3:49 PM
The best way to handle a poor night’s sleep is to drink so many caffeinated drinks that your heart skips a beat.
An alternate universe version of me who could at once afford Dior and also confidently wear bright colours would absolutely own and use this tote.
January 17, 2026 at 3:06 PM
An alternate universe version of me who could at once afford Dior and also confidently wear bright colours would absolutely own and use this tote.
Captured: My “why are you like this?” face.
This call may never end, but at least my socks are cute.
This call may never end, but at least my socks are cute.
January 16, 2026 at 6:52 PM
Captured: My “why are you like this?” face.
This call may never end, but at least my socks are cute.
This call may never end, but at least my socks are cute.
Parker felt like he needed a wash today, I guess?
January 16, 2026 at 3:24 PM
Parker felt like he needed a wash today, I guess?
Thursdays are for leg day at the gym while listening to podcasts about the Satanic Panic.
January 16, 2026 at 5:16 AM
Thursdays are for leg day at the gym while listening to podcasts about the Satanic Panic.
A friend asked me to explain how growing up old-school Catholic differed from her Baptist upbringing.
Here’s what I told her:
“You went to church.
I went to “CHURCH” (33 A.D.), directed by Guillermo del Toro (original screenplay in Latin).
Here’s what I told her:
“You went to church.
I went to “CHURCH” (33 A.D.), directed by Guillermo del Toro (original screenplay in Latin).
January 12, 2026 at 8:52 PM
A friend asked me to explain how growing up old-school Catholic differed from her Baptist upbringing.
Here’s what I told her:
“You went to church.
I went to “CHURCH” (33 A.D.), directed by Guillermo del Toro (original screenplay in Latin).
Here’s what I told her:
“You went to church.
I went to “CHURCH” (33 A.D.), directed by Guillermo del Toro (original screenplay in Latin).
This summoning ritual could have been an email. ⭕️⭐️📖
January 12, 2026 at 3:01 PM
This summoning ritual could have been an email. ⭕️⭐️📖
Me, to myself, having just done something foolish:
“Aaron, what the f*** is wrong with you‽”
*Pauses*
“So many things. Let me rephrase. What the f*** is wrong with you TODAY?”
“Aaron, what the f*** is wrong with you‽”
*Pauses*
“So many things. Let me rephrase. What the f*** is wrong with you TODAY?”
dear diary why am i like this
Alt: dear diary why am i like this
media.tenor.com
January 11, 2026 at 8:57 PM
Me, to myself, having just done something foolish:
“Aaron, what the f*** is wrong with you‽”
*Pauses*
“So many things. Let me rephrase. What the f*** is wrong with you TODAY?”
“Aaron, what the f*** is wrong with you‽”
*Pauses*
“So many things. Let me rephrase. What the f*** is wrong with you TODAY?”
My sorely tested faith in humanity was restored today when I watched a young kid tell one of our local shouty street preachers to go suck a d*ck.
January 10, 2026 at 9:39 PM
My sorely tested faith in humanity was restored today when I watched a young kid tell one of our local shouty street preachers to go suck a d*ck.
I was not prepared for how cute albatross chicks are.
January 10, 2026 at 3:49 AM
I was not prepared for how cute albatross chicks are.
Might mess around and unfold myself into some form of sentient trans dimensional geometry, idk.
January 8, 2026 at 5:58 PM
Might mess around and unfold myself into some form of sentient trans dimensional geometry, idk.
Husband: You were screaming something in your sleep last night.
Me: What was I saying?
H: I couldn’t understand it.
Me: Probably nothing to worry about. If I start levitating more than 1/2 a meter above the bed, that’s when to panic.
Me: What was I saying?
H: I couldn’t understand it.
Me: Probably nothing to worry about. If I start levitating more than 1/2 a meter above the bed, that’s when to panic.
a silhouette of a woman floating in the air with a window behind her
Alt: a silhouette of a woman floating in the air with a window behind her
media.tenor.com
January 8, 2026 at 5:15 AM
Husband: You were screaming something in your sleep last night.
Me: What was I saying?
H: I couldn’t understand it.
Me: Probably nothing to worry about. If I start levitating more than 1/2 a meter above the bed, that’s when to panic.
Me: What was I saying?
H: I couldn’t understand it.
Me: Probably nothing to worry about. If I start levitating more than 1/2 a meter above the bed, that’s when to panic.
To those who are wondering why many of my exes encounter a Mysterious Series of Unfortunate Events, let me clarify: It really is a curse.
Specifically, the curse of being dumb-arses who make terrible life choices.
Specifically, the curse of being dumb-arses who make terrible life choices.
January 5, 2026 at 5:05 PM
To those who are wondering why many of my exes encounter a Mysterious Series of Unfortunate Events, let me clarify: It really is a curse.
Specifically, the curse of being dumb-arses who make terrible life choices.
Specifically, the curse of being dumb-arses who make terrible life choices.
Things to do with leftovers (baked Mac and cheese, served with a tomato and fennel salad).
January 5, 2026 at 1:30 AM
Things to do with leftovers (baked Mac and cheese, served with a tomato and fennel salad).
I hope the person sitting in this restaurant playing videos out loud on his phone has cause to experience the same level of irritation he’s inflicting on everyone else right now.
a man is holding a microphone and saying please shut up .
Alt: a man is holding a microphone and saying please shut up .
media.tenor.com
January 3, 2026 at 8:11 PM
I hope the person sitting in this restaurant playing videos out loud on his phone has cause to experience the same level of irritation he’s inflicting on everyone else right now.
Parker was a very brave boy at his yearly check-up today. (He got a clean bill of health.) 🐈 🩺
January 3, 2026 at 7:30 PM
Parker was a very brave boy at his yearly check-up today. (He got a clean bill of health.) 🐈 🩺
Gift idea for my husband and me for our upcoming 25th anniversary: matching monogrammed sterling pill cases, symbolizing our silver anniversary year and our advancing decrepitude.
January 2, 2026 at 5:50 PM
Gift idea for my husband and me for our upcoming 25th anniversary: matching monogrammed sterling pill cases, symbolizing our silver anniversary year and our advancing decrepitude.