Lindsay Ayn, MS
@zamdanga.substack.com
(she/they) Writer/speaker/media producer focused on individual/collective trauma healing and neurodivergent self actualization. 🏳️🌈🎮🎲 Geeky and gay in PDX. 🔗 www.zamdanga.com
Reposted by Lindsay Ayn, MS
We'll be at the Goodsprings Vendor Village all weekend! Stop on by for the finest chems, weapons, Holotapes, and other wasteland essentials!
November 4, 2025 at 10:49 PM
We'll be at the Goodsprings Vendor Village all weekend! Stop on by for the finest chems, weapons, Holotapes, and other wasteland essentials!
Reposted by Lindsay Ayn, MS
Five days and counting!
November 9, 2025 at 7:24 AM
Five days and counting!
🚨 New essay drop! “You Heal, They Leave”
If you follow trauma healing online, you’ve heard this a million times, rephrased in a million ways: “You will lose people when you heal.”
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 Read the full post: open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
If you follow trauma healing online, you’ve heard this a million times, rephrased in a million ways: “You will lose people when you heal.”
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 Read the full post: open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
You Heal, They Leave
But does that make them the bad guy?
open.substack.com
October 5, 2025 at 3:26 PM
🚨 New essay drop! “You Heal, They Leave”
If you follow trauma healing online, you’ve heard this a million times, rephrased in a million ways: “You will lose people when you heal.”
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 Read the full post: open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
If you follow trauma healing online, you’ve heard this a million times, rephrased in a million ways: “You will lose people when you heal.”
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 Read the full post: open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Hah. Nice. (Finally reading Neuroqueer Heresies.)
September 24, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Hah. Nice. (Finally reading Neuroqueer Heresies.)
Isn't it crazy how despite knowing we would all benefit from living in a world full of educated people, we don't have the option to take a part time job getting paid to read?
September 19, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Isn't it crazy how despite knowing we would all benefit from living in a world full of educated people, we don't have the option to take a part time job getting paid to read?
🚨 New essay drop! “Save Your Punches For Power”
The internet doesn’t seem to grasp *power differentials.*
By now, we ought to know the difference between fighting oppression and fighting each other, but I’m not seeing that.
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
The internet doesn’t seem to grasp *power differentials.*
By now, we ought to know the difference between fighting oppression and fighting each other, but I’m not seeing that.
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Save Your Punches For Power
Can we tell the difference between fighting oppression and fighting each other?
open.substack.com
September 16, 2025 at 4:54 PM
🚨 New essay drop! “Save Your Punches For Power”
The internet doesn’t seem to grasp *power differentials.*
By now, we ought to know the difference between fighting oppression and fighting each other, but I’m not seeing that.
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
The internet doesn’t seem to grasp *power differentials.*
By now, we ought to know the difference between fighting oppression and fighting each other, but I’m not seeing that.
Let’s talk about it.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
There's something weirdly empowering about crying while doing dishes. It's like, yes, I'm feeling all the feelings, but I'm still here, I'm still taking care of my life, and I am NOT giving up. 💪
September 15, 2025 at 9:14 PM
There's something weirdly empowering about crying while doing dishes. It's like, yes, I'm feeling all the feelings, but I'm still here, I'm still taking care of my life, and I am NOT giving up. 💪
🚨 New essay drop! “Narcissism, Neurodivergence, and Self-Control”
In July, I said the core of narcissism is entitlement to evade anything perceived as threat at all costs.
In that case, what’s with the cruelty for sport?
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
In July, I said the core of narcissism is entitlement to evade anything perceived as threat at all costs.
In that case, what’s with the cruelty for sport?
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Narcissism, Neurodivergence, and Self-Control
If narcissism is about avoiding threats, what’s with the cruelty for sport?
open.substack.com
September 13, 2025 at 11:04 PM
🚨 New essay drop! “Narcissism, Neurodivergence, and Self-Control”
In July, I said the core of narcissism is entitlement to evade anything perceived as threat at all costs.
In that case, what’s with the cruelty for sport?
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
In July, I said the core of narcissism is entitlement to evade anything perceived as threat at all costs.
In that case, what’s with the cruelty for sport?
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
🚨 New essay drop! “The Fears Are Real, But Do We Need The Triggers?”
Are we gaslighting ourselves if we challenge our triggers?
I’m currently binge-reading Dr. Catherine M. Pittman’s work on the amygdala...
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Are we gaslighting ourselves if we challenge our triggers?
I’m currently binge-reading Dr. Catherine M. Pittman’s work on the amygdala...
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
The Fears Are Real, But Do We Need The Triggers?
Are we gaslighting ourselves if we challenge our triggers?
open.substack.com
September 11, 2025 at 2:10 AM
🚨 New essay drop! “The Fears Are Real, But Do We Need The Triggers?”
Are we gaslighting ourselves if we challenge our triggers?
I’m currently binge-reading Dr. Catherine M. Pittman’s work on the amygdala...
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Are we gaslighting ourselves if we challenge our triggers?
I’m currently binge-reading Dr. Catherine M. Pittman’s work on the amygdala...
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Meet Baby Battle Buddy, my cartoon personification of my amygdala. He’s my body guard, but also a baby. I feel like if I picture this character every time I’m triggered, it’ll be easier to have compassion for myself. 😂 (Illustrated in Adobe Fresco, for whoever is curious.)
August 29, 2025 at 8:30 PM
Meet Baby Battle Buddy, my cartoon personification of my amygdala. He’s my body guard, but also a baby. I feel like if I picture this character every time I’m triggered, it’ll be easier to have compassion for myself. 😂 (Illustrated in Adobe Fresco, for whoever is curious.)
Quitting smoking is easier than quitting rumination because I can't just decide to stop buying packs of imaginary arguments at the corner store because I'm out of money.
August 29, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Quitting smoking is easier than quitting rumination because I can't just decide to stop buying packs of imaginary arguments at the corner store because I'm out of money.
Reposted by Lindsay Ayn, MS
Hello podcasters and bloggers
Does this book look cool to you?
Would you like to talk to the author about it?
Amelia seems like a super cool person on a similar mission as many of us. Check out their book & let me know if you'd like to get in touch & are having trouble
ameliajmichael.com/book/
Does this book look cool to you?
Would you like to talk to the author about it?
Amelia seems like a super cool person on a similar mission as many of us. Check out their book & let me know if you'd like to get in touch & are having trouble
ameliajmichael.com/book/
Book - Amelia J. Michael
Show Up. Stand Up. Take Action. Inclusion is under attack, and compliance is not the only option. Gender Inclusion at Work is a hands-on guide for leaders, HR teams, and allies who refuse to let trans...
ameliajmichael.com
August 29, 2025 at 2:52 PM
Hello podcasters and bloggers
Does this book look cool to you?
Would you like to talk to the author about it?
Amelia seems like a super cool person on a similar mission as many of us. Check out their book & let me know if you'd like to get in touch & are having trouble
ameliajmichael.com/book/
Does this book look cool to you?
Would you like to talk to the author about it?
Amelia seems like a super cool person on a similar mission as many of us. Check out their book & let me know if you'd like to get in touch & are having trouble
ameliajmichael.com/book/
Reposted by Lindsay Ayn, MS
While rewatching the Fallout Amazon series for the wiki, I noticed this aspirant using a walker to get around.
As someone who has had to use a walker just like that in the past due to medical issues, it was really nice to see included.
Representation matters.
As someone who has had to use a walker just like that in the past due to medical issues, it was really nice to see included.
Representation matters.
August 29, 2025 at 1:40 PM
While rewatching the Fallout Amazon series for the wiki, I noticed this aspirant using a walker to get around.
As someone who has had to use a walker just like that in the past due to medical issues, it was really nice to see included.
Representation matters.
As someone who has had to use a walker just like that in the past due to medical issues, it was really nice to see included.
Representation matters.
Thank you, NSP, for being a continuing source for joy in my life. 💖 youtu.be/yqVzsXxD_h4?...
The Power Of Love - NSP
YouTube video by Ninja Sex Party
youtu.be
August 29, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Thank you, NSP, for being a continuing source for joy in my life. 💖 youtu.be/yqVzsXxD_h4?...
I’m really proud of straight women. Y’all have come a long way.
How do I know?
Pedro Pascal.
You picked a good one. Good job.
How do I know?
Pedro Pascal.
You picked a good one. Good job.
August 26, 2025 at 5:22 PM
I’m really proud of straight women. Y’all have come a long way.
How do I know?
Pedro Pascal.
You picked a good one. Good job.
How do I know?
Pedro Pascal.
You picked a good one. Good job.
No one gets to judge me for my response to their lies.
If the trigger wasn’t relevant to reality, neither was my response.
Don’t call me a bad actor when you’re a bad director.
If the trigger wasn’t relevant to reality, neither was my response.
Don’t call me a bad actor when you’re a bad director.
August 24, 2025 at 6:05 PM
No one gets to judge me for my response to their lies.
If the trigger wasn’t relevant to reality, neither was my response.
Don’t call me a bad actor when you’re a bad director.
If the trigger wasn’t relevant to reality, neither was my response.
Don’t call me a bad actor when you’re a bad director.
When I hurt a person, the person hates me.
When my keeper hurts a person, the person hates themself.
Never forget that anyone you blame for a conflict failed to convince you to blame someone else.
The creepiest among us never fail.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
When my keeper hurts a person, the person hates themself.
Never forget that anyone you blame for a conflict failed to convince you to blame someone else.
The creepiest among us never fail.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Is Your Best Friend The Devil? 🚩 A List of Red Flags
Not sure if your friendship is toxic? Or if you’re the toxic one? This list might help.
open.substack.com
August 24, 2025 at 3:50 PM
When I hurt a person, the person hates me.
When my keeper hurts a person, the person hates themself.
Never forget that anyone you blame for a conflict failed to convince you to blame someone else.
The creepiest among us never fail.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
When my keeper hurts a person, the person hates themself.
Never forget that anyone you blame for a conflict failed to convince you to blame someone else.
The creepiest among us never fail.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
🚨 Update from Zamdanga Impact on Substack 🚨
Zamdanga Impact on break—returning December 2025.
Focusing on Zamdanga Healing and introspection while I gather strength and wisdom.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Zamdanga Impact on break—returning December 2025.
Focusing on Zamdanga Healing and introspection while I gather strength and wisdom.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Update: Zamdanga Impact Will Resume in December
Focusing on Zamdanga Healing and introspection while I gather strength and wisdom.
open.substack.com
August 22, 2025 at 5:11 PM
🚨 Update from Zamdanga Impact on Substack 🚨
Zamdanga Impact on break—returning December 2025.
Focusing on Zamdanga Healing and introspection while I gather strength and wisdom.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Zamdanga Impact on break—returning December 2025.
Focusing on Zamdanga Healing and introspection while I gather strength and wisdom.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Trying to control your life from inside an abusive relationship is like trying to steer a train from inside the passenger car. You can't even explore your options until you get off.
August 22, 2025 at 2:54 PM
Trying to control your life from inside an abusive relationship is like trying to steer a train from inside the passenger car. You can't even explore your options until you get off.
Well, just smoked my last cigarette. Not for my health—for my wallet. Replacing the habit with meditation. If you need me, I’ll likely be climbing the walls and clawing at my own face.
August 21, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Well, just smoked my last cigarette. Not for my health—for my wallet. Replacing the habit with meditation. If you need me, I’ll likely be climbing the walls and clawing at my own face.
On my Substack I talk about someone I call "my keeper."
This. This. THIS is how she treated me. For 25 goddamn years.
Only she actually DID put me in a psych ward.
www.threads.com/@adamconover...
This. This. THIS is how she treated me. For 25 goddamn years.
Only she actually DID put me in a psych ward.
www.threads.com/@adamconover...
Adam Conover (@adamconover) on Threads
Vivian Wilson gave me a masterclass in bullying
www.threads.com
August 21, 2025 at 10:49 AM
On my Substack I talk about someone I call "my keeper."
This. This. THIS is how she treated me. For 25 goddamn years.
Only she actually DID put me in a psych ward.
www.threads.com/@adamconover...
This. This. THIS is how she treated me. For 25 goddamn years.
Only she actually DID put me in a psych ward.
www.threads.com/@adamconover...
🚨 New essay drop! “Demand Avoidant? This Might Change Your Life” 🚨
Living with demand avoidance is hard.
But I recently realized that my go-to strategies have stolen years of my life away.
Luckily, I finally found the answer.
Let me break it down for you.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Living with demand avoidance is hard.
But I recently realized that my go-to strategies have stolen years of my life away.
Luckily, I finally found the answer.
Let me break it down for you.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Demand Avoidant? This Might Change Your Life
As it turns out—avoiding demands is demanding.
open.substack.com
August 20, 2025 at 9:27 PM
🚨 New essay drop! “Demand Avoidant? This Might Change Your Life” 🚨
Living with demand avoidance is hard.
But I recently realized that my go-to strategies have stolen years of my life away.
Luckily, I finally found the answer.
Let me break it down for you.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Living with demand avoidance is hard.
But I recently realized that my go-to strategies have stolen years of my life away.
Luckily, I finally found the answer.
Let me break it down for you.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Refusing to waste time wastes time. ⏱️ Refusing to waste time wastes time. ⏱️ Refusing to waste time wastes time.
August 20, 2025 at 1:30 PM
Refusing to waste time wastes time. ⏱️ Refusing to waste time wastes time. ⏱️ Refusing to waste time wastes time.
I just watched Drive-Away Dolls. This lesbian didn't know how much she wanted to see Margaret Qualley cosplaying Shane McCutcheon. 😂 👩❤️👩
August 18, 2025 at 5:51 PM
I just watched Drive-Away Dolls. This lesbian didn't know how much she wanted to see Margaret Qualley cosplaying Shane McCutcheon. 😂 👩❤️👩
🚨 New essay drop! “My Silliest ADHD Life Hacks” 🚨
Neurodivergent trauma healing is hard—we need some levity up in here. So today, I’d like to dazzle you with the silliest ways I manage my ADHD.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Neurodivergent trauma healing is hard—we need some levity up in here. So today, I’d like to dazzle you with the silliest ways I manage my ADHD.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
My Silliest ADHD Life Hacks
Managing ADHD can be hard. Let’s have fun with it.
open.substack.com
August 16, 2025 at 6:45 PM
🚨 New essay drop! “My Silliest ADHD Life Hacks” 🚨
Neurodivergent trauma healing is hard—we need some levity up in here. So today, I’d like to dazzle you with the silliest ways I manage my ADHD.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...
Neurodivergent trauma healing is hard—we need some levity up in here. So today, I’d like to dazzle you with the silliest ways I manage my ADHD.
🔗 open.substack.com/pub/zamdanga...