I’m incapable of making pasta as a weekly meal prep dish. I lose all self control. Five days worth of pasta? No- one day worth of pasta and five days worth of regret.

There are so few things that couldn’t be improved by a wacky waving inflatable tube man.

Gave my partner a hard time for getting me a card because we said we weren’t doing anything for Valentine’s Day. I also got him a card but you gotta keep ‘em on their toes, you know?

My friend just wished me “the most uneventful year ever” and it’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever wished for me.

Look, I’ve had a really hard decade, cut me some slack.

The #tiktokban and reversal feels like an April Fools joke

@tiktokcanada.bsky.social any info on why the ban is affecting Canada? #tiktok #tiktokban #tiktokcanada

Another year? I just had one. #newyear #2025

I’m not ready to start writing all the dates wrong again. #newyear

The worst part about being Jewish is having to clean the wax out of the hanukkiah. #hanukkah #jewish