Dr. O Lucafont
@xtruth-unfiltrd.bsky.social
Pinned
everywhere I go I bring a Bluetooth speaker and an iPod nano filled with phase-flipped versions of songs I hate
my idea for fixing the economy is that a hamburger should cost $6 and we adjust everything else based on that
November 26, 2025 at 2:24 PM
my idea for fixing the economy is that a hamburger should cost $6 and we adjust everything else based on that
Reposted by Dr. O Lucafont
Alien overlord: For your punishment you will be forced to drink… (looking at alien notes) One hundred beers.
Me: Holy shit I uh… wait. Is there like a time limit or something?
Alien overlord: No. Just drink them all at some point.
Me, really selling it: NOOO😭😭😭😭
Me: Holy shit I uh… wait. Is there like a time limit or something?
Alien overlord: No. Just drink them all at some point.
Me, really selling it: NOOO😭😭😭😭
October 30, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Alien overlord: For your punishment you will be forced to drink… (looking at alien notes) One hundred beers.
Me: Holy shit I uh… wait. Is there like a time limit or something?
Alien overlord: No. Just drink them all at some point.
Me, really selling it: NOOO😭😭😭😭
Me: Holy shit I uh… wait. Is there like a time limit or something?
Alien overlord: No. Just drink them all at some point.
Me, really selling it: NOOO😭😭😭😭
getting a foam call
October 23, 2025 at 2:12 PM
getting a foam call
i am certain that I've been shadowbanned from recycling pickup but I have no way to prove it
October 16, 2025 at 10:32 PM
i am certain that I've been shadowbanned from recycling pickup but I have no way to prove it
Unlucky Charms. 1/4 of the marshmallow bits are poisoned
October 15, 2025 at 5:25 PM
Unlucky Charms. 1/4 of the marshmallow bits are poisoned
we need an AI that will tell you when it's recycling week
October 9, 2025 at 2:17 AM
we need an AI that will tell you when it's recycling week
oh yeah? Well my anonymous source could totally beat up your anonymous source
October 3, 2025 at 9:15 PM
oh yeah? Well my anonymous source could totally beat up your anonymous source
i can't believe Mike Johnson is the name of the speaker of the house and not a lights out 8th inning guy for the dodgers
October 1, 2025 at 4:12 AM
i can't believe Mike Johnson is the name of the speaker of the house and not a lights out 8th inning guy for the dodgers
i can't believe they already changed it again. from the war department to the epic department.
September 30, 2025 at 1:04 PM
i can't believe they already changed it again. from the war department to the epic department.
The Trump administration has announced immediate deployment of the national guard to the Arby's bathroom. "It's a literal warzone in there," said the president.
September 29, 2025 at 1:46 AM
The Trump administration has announced immediate deployment of the national guard to the Arby's bathroom. "It's a literal warzone in there," said the president.
*losing a rap battle* That's an Ad Hominem
September 20, 2025 at 12:38 AM
*losing a rap battle* That's an Ad Hominem
chatgpt may seem new to the public but it has actually been around for 20 years powering the Hallmark Channel
September 18, 2025 at 1:40 AM
chatgpt may seem new to the public but it has actually been around for 20 years powering the Hallmark Channel
pocket dimension vacuum that deposits all your cat hair into a third world country you thought collapsed in 1994
September 17, 2025 at 7:19 PM
pocket dimension vacuum that deposits all your cat hair into a third world country you thought collapsed in 1994
kicked out of the DnD group (eating the dice like cereal)
September 3, 2025 at 3:04 AM
kicked out of the DnD group (eating the dice like cereal)
cool Massachusetts fact! Waltham is procedurally generated every time you drive through it
August 27, 2025 at 10:33 PM
cool Massachusetts fact! Waltham is procedurally generated every time you drive through it
boarding group G may now enter the jetway. boarding group G, Goblins, Gremlins, Ghouls, and General Creepy Crawlies. may board at this time
August 26, 2025 at 2:33 PM
boarding group G may now enter the jetway. boarding group G, Goblins, Gremlins, Ghouls, and General Creepy Crawlies. may board at this time
August 21, 2025 at 1:20 AM
they make pizza for grown ups now. it's called "flat breads"
August 21, 2025 at 1:20 AM
they make pizza for grown ups now. it's called "flat breads"
at what age do I increase all the text on my phone to 200%
August 20, 2025 at 2:17 PM
at what age do I increase all the text on my phone to 200%
Reposted by Dr. O Lucafont
Reposted by Dr. O Lucafont
Hit the point in going through old files where I start saying, "I fucked up, I fucked up so bad," so it's time to stop.
August 8, 2025 at 12:27 AM
Hit the point in going through old files where I start saying, "I fucked up, I fucked up so bad," so it's time to stop.
going to the DMV to be legally registered as a car to get more flexible insurance
August 3, 2025 at 4:01 PM
going to the DMV to be legally registered as a car to get more flexible insurance
unfortunately Joe has lost his job at the button factory to offshoring
August 3, 2025 at 2:24 AM
unfortunately Joe has lost his job at the button factory to offshoring
called in sick (spike trap)
August 3, 2025 at 12:40 AM
called in sick (spike trap)
stablecoins issued by, and backed by the reserves of, sperm banks
August 2, 2025 at 5:55 PM
stablecoins issued by, and backed by the reserves of, sperm banks