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wurmplewasright.bsky.social
@wurmplewasright.bsky.social
I like fruit and jokes
Who up platoing their cave?
October 10, 2025 at 2:01 PM
“Deadass” and “literally” are competing apex predators
July 17, 2025 at 2:24 AM
If god is real, they’re a fucking freak for coming up with internal organs
June 28, 2025 at 12:02 PM
Jugular veins are on my hear me out list
May 30, 2025 at 10:46 PM
This is what periods feel like
May 26, 2025 at 7:45 PM
I have to take this rotten melon to the compost sounds like a euphemism and yet.
May 26, 2025 at 7:39 PM
“Supports focus” I love you off brand adderall 💕
May 16, 2025 at 4:46 PM
No one tells you you can put salt on any chocolate you want. But you can
May 9, 2025 at 2:49 PM
Forget just touching grass. Brother, you need to eat grass until you throw up like a sick dog
May 8, 2025 at 6:38 PM
You let that guy hurt you? He literally has the “start slower” option turned on for the no internet dinosaur game 🤢
May 8, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Me trying to get my friends to validate my non-essential purchases: And approximately how much would you say the hoodie in this picture is worth to you?
….$40?
May 6, 2025 at 3:27 AM
one of my canines is too long and the dentist keeps threatening to file it down but I wont let him. Might need it some day

#myemergencyshank #emotionalsupporttooth
May 2, 2025 at 6:46 PM
thinking I may have beefed up my immune system by chewing on my fingers during church and biting scooter handles. I vividly remember getting got in the ankle by a scooter and biting a handle down to the base
May 2, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Reposted
poolside porygon ☀️

#b3d #art #pokemon
April 28, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Slimey was supposed to go up on the blue origin rocket but they cut him to make it all women 😔 the woke agenda takes another victim
May 2, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Looking at and lusting after expensive perfume makes me feel like the street urchin in love with the rich girl in all of those movies. Uptown Girl plays in my head as I stare at her. If you weren’t literally $300 we could be together…
May 2, 2025 at 3:33 PM
As a soup lover, sometimes soup looks so gross. Wet with chunks. But she has so much love and flavor to give!! Always supporting cast. Why. She’s the main character to me
May 2, 2025 at 12:40 AM
How it feels to go get the mail when something you’ve ordered arrived
May 2, 2025 at 12:13 AM
having beef with my mother’s goldfish akin to that between Moby Dick and that fuckass sailor
April 30, 2025 at 8:57 PM
Driving can be fun because wheeee but it’s also not fun because if you wheeee too much you kill someone
April 30, 2025 at 7:35 PM
Psh. And they said carrying around a dirty plastic fork in my backpack side pocket ON PURPOSE AND NOT BECAUSE I KEPT FORGETTING IT for 3 years would never pay off
April 30, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Guys what if someone was in love with me, what if- you want to interrupt my nightly youtube session for sex?? NUMEROUS NIGHTS A WEEK?
Hmmm.. I don’t know… we should probably see other people…..yeah no it’s you
April 30, 2025 at 6:30 PM
If cvs is out of aloe drinks AGAIN I’m going to start juicing their bushes
April 30, 2025 at 5:48 PM
A little too easy to funnel all of my thoughts into this platform instead of sending them to my annoyed friends
April 30, 2025 at 4:24 PM
Everyone shut up. The porn bots and I are having a discussion. What were you saying about Animal Farm, Bella Tiddy?
Fuck she forgot. Thanks guys
April 30, 2025 at 4:22 PM