Ryan Smith
@wry-guy.bsky.social
I write for gameshows when I’m not napping with my dog
Hey News Outlets:
One guy has cancer.
The other guy IS cancer.
Only one is threatening the country’s survival.
Please report accordingly.
One guy has cancer.
The other guy IS cancer.
Only one is threatening the country’s survival.
Please report accordingly.
May 22, 2025 at 3:41 PM
Hey News Outlets:
One guy has cancer.
The other guy IS cancer.
Only one is threatening the country’s survival.
Please report accordingly.
One guy has cancer.
The other guy IS cancer.
Only one is threatening the country’s survival.
Please report accordingly.
unsubscribe
verb
un·sub·scribe | \ ˌən-səb-ˈskrīb \
1 : to click a barely visible email link resulting in a 400% increase in emails and aggressive promotional offers.
2 : to enter an endless loop of “Are you sure?” screens and broken links designed to devour any remaining joy in your life.
verb
un·sub·scribe | \ ˌən-səb-ˈskrīb \
1 : to click a barely visible email link resulting in a 400% increase in emails and aggressive promotional offers.
2 : to enter an endless loop of “Are you sure?” screens and broken links designed to devour any remaining joy in your life.
May 15, 2025 at 10:23 PM
unsubscribe
verb
un·sub·scribe | \ ˌən-səb-ˈskrīb \
1 : to click a barely visible email link resulting in a 400% increase in emails and aggressive promotional offers.
2 : to enter an endless loop of “Are you sure?” screens and broken links designed to devour any remaining joy in your life.
verb
un·sub·scribe | \ ˌən-səb-ˈskrīb \
1 : to click a barely visible email link resulting in a 400% increase in emails and aggressive promotional offers.
2 : to enter an endless loop of “Are you sure?” screens and broken links designed to devour any remaining joy in your life.
Never read “The Art of the Deal,” but I assume every chapter is Chapter 11.
April 11, 2025 at 3:54 PM
Never read “The Art of the Deal,” but I assume every chapter is Chapter 11.
Just in: In retaliation, Crest is removing all water from its toothpaste.
RFK Jr. says he plans to tell CDC to stop recommending fluoride in drinking water
U.S. Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. says he plans to tell the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention soon to stop recommending fluoridation in communities nationwide.
apnews.com
April 9, 2025 at 5:21 PM
Just in: In retaliation, Crest is removing all water from its toothpaste.
Oh no! What did Biden do NOW?!
April 3, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Oh no! What did Biden do NOW?!
Before he stepped away from the lectern, I wish Cory Booker had said to the stenographer, ‘OK, can you read that back to me?’
April 2, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Before he stepped away from the lectern, I wish Cory Booker had said to the stenographer, ‘OK, can you read that back to me?’
I’m starting to wonder if he was ever hinged in the first place.
March 19, 2025 at 3:00 PM
I’m starting to wonder if he was ever hinged in the first place.
A heartfelt CONGRATS to RFK Jr !!!
With love,
Measles
With love,
Measles
February 14, 2025 at 7:31 PM
A heartfelt CONGRATS to RFK Jr !!!
With love,
Measles
With love,
Measles
They're saying the salute we all know we saw, we did not see. In other words, it was a NOT SEE SALUTE.
January 23, 2025 at 6:32 PM
They're saying the salute we all know we saw, we did not see. In other words, it was a NOT SEE SALUTE.