I woulda turned Emma Robert’s ass every which way but loose, you hear me?

I’m not a drinker, but I like when people will do a drinks menu for the holidays. No shade to the girls who throw henny and coke into a red solo cup and call it a day, but the real entertainers got themed cocktails for their celebrations

Jersey beating BH feels criminal. One of the planets must be in retrograde, cause I’m not understanding

Wait…I thought the whole point of her dragging out the separation was bc she signed a post-nup that said she wouldn’t get anything. You mean she could’ve been running crypt creeper’s pockets this whole time and chose otherwise?

The way Dorit was cussing Kyle’s ass out, I just know Andy threatened to put her on pause at the end of last season. Mama is clocked the fuck in, ok?

I cannot stand ha, but she ate that one lil thing

Just finished the RHOBH premiere, and it was hands down the best housewives opener we’ve had in a while.

It’s brick af in LA and the moon got her pussy facing the world. I just felt the chill of providence. My opps should be scared.

Treated myself to chipotle cause I had a hard day, and the bowl was nasty

Need my Bravo girlies fully settled before the RHOBH premiere on Tuesday. Let’s not forget our roles, ladies.

We might have to close the gates for a lil bit, I just saw a B*rb on the timeline.

Taking a lil FMLA time to break in a new app

Give us time to get adjusted before y’all start with the hypoghetticals, pls

Apartheid Clyde really ran our ass off that app