I hope you never find them.
i know you better
than you know yourself
because you’re too scared
to look.
i know you better
than you know yourself
because you’re too scared
to look.
and everything felt real again.
it seems my brain doesn’t want to believe,
what my heart already knows.
and everything felt real again.
it seems my brain doesn’t want to believe,
what my heart already knows.
does not work
im running straight
into the arms
of a femme.
does not work
im running straight
into the arms
of a femme.
a careful distance
close enough
to touch
far away
not to combust
a careful distance
close enough
to touch
far away
not to combust
STOP SCROLLING ON YOUR PHONE
your wife is r i g h t h e r e
talk to her. touch her even. make her feel real.
STOP SCROLLING ON YOUR PHONE
your wife is r i g h t h e r e
talk to her. touch her even. make her feel real.
but just some girl.
but just some girl.
saved myself
do I want you to
come rescue me?
yes
saved myself
do I want you to
come rescue me?
yes
more though, i want to feel the sun come back to my heart.
more though, i want to feel the sun come back to my heart.
to live a life
you don’t want to escape from.
to live a life
you don’t want to escape from.
it’s that i’m scared i can’t.
it’s that i’m scared i can’t.
i deserve
better than this.
but i also know
there is no
w a y o u t.
i deserve
better than this.
but i also know
there is no
w a y o u t.
in the space
between
my beating heart
and this
ticking clock
in the space
between
my beating heart
and this
ticking clock
i think it is anger.
crawling out from my depths,
a fiery ‘i knew it’.
a roar of heat at the realization
that you made me feel
confused
broken
silly
when really,
the problem,
was you.
i think it is anger.
crawling out from my depths,
a fiery ‘i knew it’.
a roar of heat at the realization
that you made me feel
confused
broken
silly
when really,
the problem,
was you.
i knew it.
i knew it.
just
might
k!ll
me.
just
might
k!ll
me.
all of the ones i hold dear,
buzz in hives with others, some they seldom see,
but who also hold pieces of their heart.
i will wait,
try not to be swallowed whole by the shadows, by the cold.
and hope enough of my spark is left when they float back to me.
all of the ones i hold dear,
buzz in hives with others, some they seldom see,
but who also hold pieces of their heart.
i will wait,
try not to be swallowed whole by the shadows, by the cold.
and hope enough of my spark is left when they float back to me.
we circle each other in this house
we agreed to be each others’ person
but you feel impossibly far
impossibly opaque
impossibly someone else
we circle each other in this house
we agreed to be each others’ person
but you feel impossibly far
impossibly opaque
impossibly someone else
Of you not being here
Is somehow easier to handle
Than the inconsistency
Of when you are.
Of you not being here
Is somehow easier to handle
Than the inconsistency
Of when you are.
stop
hiding
me
it
feels
awful
stop
hiding
me
it
feels
awful
Wednesday knocks at my window,
rain dripping from her hair.
She doesn’t ask to come in-
just stares long enough
to remind me
this week is not endless,
though it feels that way sometimes.
#poetry
Wednesday knocks at my window,
rain dripping from her hair.
She doesn’t ask to come in-
just stares long enough
to remind me
this week is not endless,
though it feels that way sometimes.
#poetry
b e i n g
myself
i will
d e l i g h t
in my own
existence
b e i n g
myself
i will
d e l i g h t
in my own
existence
Watch you enjoy your perfect family
While mine teeters on the brink.
Watch you enjoy your perfect family
While mine teeters on the brink.
For you to come back to me.
For you to come back to yourself.
For you to come back to me.
For you to come back to yourself.
most in love with
my body I have ever
been while you are
simultaneously the
most disinterested
you ever have.
most in love with
my body I have ever
been while you are
simultaneously the
most disinterested
you ever have.