there is an epidemic of people not turning their headlights on at night. either they are so bright they’re blinding or they’re just not on at all. everyone needs to re-take their driving tests

every time i go to the deli before work i have to drive by a gigantic trump store. just a bunch of flags and merch for a guy. i get secondhand embarrassment just from looking at it

andy murray coaching novak djokovic for the australian open 😭😭😭 what the fuck that’s the funniest thing ive ever seen

temped the gods of fate a little too much because i’ve been bragging for weeks about how great my 10-year-old car is and now the doors won’t lock

love taking the NYT news quiz every week because they always throw in a sports question and the majority of people never get it right

i have gotten this ad on twitter so many fucking times it makes me want to chuck my phone off a bridge, insanely stupid website

really feels like i can say anything i want here with zero consequences and fewer weirdos. this is crazy