// good qrt. laughed very hard. i am cheesed.

im losing my edge its messy as fuck

goodnight to this world, which denies her a goodbye. both she and it know that this departure is just as meaningless. )

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀
⠀⠀ And not a single person ever will.
⠀⠀

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀
⠀⠀ Not a single person in the world has shed a tear, for Alice Maiya.
⠀⠀

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀
⠀⠀Alice Maiya’s tragedy is not one.
⠀⠀

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀
⠀⠀The tragedy of Alice Maiya is not a tragedy to the world, and they will never hear that it is.
⠀⠀

they can always just blame it on insanity, and they will.

and so, as her eyes finally shut; as cold stillness pries her from the pools of visceral warmth and sinks her head beneath the waves of tired souls, she reminds herself of this truth again, and what the tears are for.

and they’re laughing at how overcomplicated she’d made it all ——— and justice will never be served.

the grief, the anger, the sorrow . . . it takes so, so, so many shapes.

but from the outside, looking in?

somewhere —— somewhere, something is laughing. somewhere up there, there’s a window into this world, and they’re gawking at the corpse twitching its last on the ground and picking the thoughts out of her brain like pearls from an oyster.

oh, God forgive, it is still human. It is still something that lived, and it wants, and it yearns, no matter how undeserving. there’s not a single point to any of this, it’s just . . . humiliation.

yeah.

( lying dead in a puddle of organs and broken bones, a corpse weeps. because it will never again be treated as the person it once was; it’s a lifeless, worthless husk now, and it’s been hit with the worst truth of all ———

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀
⠀⠀❪ 𝙄 𝙒𝘼𝙉𝙏𝙀𝘿 𝙏𝙊 𝘽𝙀 𝙂𝙊𝙊𝘿.ᐟ 𝙈𝙊𝙈, 𝙄’𝙈 𝙎𝙊𝙍𝙍𝙔 𝙄 𝙒𝘼𝙎𝙉’𝙏 𝙂𝙊𝙊𝘿.ᐟ 𝙋𝙇𝙀𝘼𝙎𝙀 𝘿𝙊𝙉’𝙏 𝙃𝘼𝙏𝙀 𝙈𝙀 ———— 𝙋𝙇𝙀𝘼𝙎𝙀 𝘿𝙊𝙉'𝙏 𝙃𝘼𝙏𝙀 𝙈𝙀.ᐟ ❫
⠀⠀

( but don’t you believe you deserve it? )

( i do. )

( then take your punishment. )

( i’m sorry. I don’t have the right to call out like that. I’m sorry I can’t be better than an unjust human. I’m trying so hard to be, but I’ll never get there, right? )

( that she’s so wicked to the world at large that such a small want of, “please just let me lay down for a while”, is such a laughably selfish statement that the caveat is having her ribcage pried apart so that the bones can be used to punch holes through her lungs?!

( because it’s so 𝐒𝐀𝐃, isn’t it?! isn’t it so miserably tragic that she, prisoner or no, sinner or no, cannot beg for a moment of silence without it being answered in death, such gruesome death?! )

i’m ——— ❪ 𝑯𝑨𝑪𝑲.ᐟ ❫ i’m s—so—— ❪ 𝘙𝘌𝘛𝘊𝘏. ❫ so—rry . . . I wanted to be g—gooood . .