I got Charlie's cremains. I'm trying not to fall apart. The tech didn't do the nose print the way I had hoped for so that there were clear lines and a firm impression. I'm disappointed and sad. Meanwhile I have six or so paw impressions in clay and ink. /fin

I wasn't able to make it to my second planned interview today. I called and left a message requesting a phone interview. It happened while I was bussing home and I didn't feel confident after it was done. /4

My spouse's cat had a heavy nosebleed and we just got out of the emergency visit. Our vet's outstanding balance continues to increase. /3

Spouse reminded me that I was still healing last week from my surgery and not have managed the walk well. It helped a little bit but I had really, really wanted to work there. /2

Yep. One day. We're both disappointed and frustrated, but personal safety is paramount. "I thought I could do it because of my history."

Sitting jobs in the future, with strength training in the meantime.

I feel helpless and hopeless, not just about my own life but the life outside in the world for others. It's really hard to motivate myself to get out of my bed right now. /fin

But it's complicated. I'm supposed to get a follow-up call tomorrow. I just really want a cuddle and to be told that everything is taken care of, but that's not gonna happen. I spent almost 3hrs talking to my bestie yesterday which increased morale but she lives in another state. /5

Spouse has sciatica, which makes most long periods of standing very painful for them. So yeah, things suck right now. I'm still mourning the loss of my 19-yo ESA. I'm still unemployed (spouse started work today). I'm struggling to walk and take care of myself. I might have lost insurance... /4

As you can imagine, I can barely stand to cook either, let alone chores and further unpacking my new rental. The only furniture we have is our bed which is still in the front living space (br is on 2nd floor) and a sofa. No dining table or chairs, no microwave (still in storage). /3