Can you imagine being part of the ad firm that put this together? Borrow $100 so you can feed yourself! Not sure how they sleep at night.

First cavity and filling at 41. The rot is setting in.

Big time of year for the flying orb ball things.

Definitely a mistake to not wear sweatpants for this furniture assembly. A mistake in general to wear jeans after Thanksgiving.

Why do they keep making lamps where the switch is on the cord so you have to yank up the cord to turn it on?

Took the dog being home 5 hours for him to puke on the new rug.

Music Twitter way too excited about a rage bait article based on a Facebook comment from one angry dad.

Why does all the art around crypto news articles look like Lisa Frank?

Jimmy Fallon isn’t selling the lip sync.

Sorry to break it to y’all but nobody will be.

Funny how Thom Yorke wished it was the 60s and now all the kids wish it was the 90s. Nobody wishes something would happen though because there’s way too much happening.

I guess I’ve never had to buy a microwave before. Have they always been a billion dollars?

Latest engagement bait being fed to me on Threads seems to be “I GOT THE JOB”. Which is a change from “I was just laid off”. Is it better here?

Told my kids it was making me upset they were breaking their new sidewalk chalk on purpose and my daughter responded by breaking another right in my face. I left without saying a word and am worried that was too harsh. This is millennial parenting failing in real time.

We’re going to need a rainbow book or something with safe businesses for LGBTQ people on road trips.

Been off Twitter since October and forgot how to do this…

Bloop