UnhingedBfComments
@unhingedbfcomments.bsky.social
Dedicated to my boyfriend’s unhinged comments || His idea || He doesn’t remember half of what he’s said
“I feel like… 🎶 ass 🎶”
June 24, 2025 at 10:09 PM
“I feel like… 🎶 ass 🎶”
“It’s not very Disney to use the historical version of bitches and tricks”
June 24, 2025 at 10:08 PM
“It’s not very Disney to use the historical version of bitches and tricks”
“He can’t hear your pithy remark”
June 21, 2025 at 11:40 PM
“He can’t hear your pithy remark”
“That would not be quality”
June 20, 2025 at 5:35 PM
“That would not be quality”
“The visceral feverish need for an 18 piece spicy tuna roll.”
June 20, 2025 at 5:33 PM
“The visceral feverish need for an 18 piece spicy tuna roll.”
“Think of the lives of all those yeasts… that went into culture of this drink… that now I now drink..”
May 24, 2025 at 12:02 AM
“Think of the lives of all those yeasts… that went into culture of this drink… that now I now drink..”
“I’m not going to piss myself. I’m going to commit an act of violence.”
May 3, 2025 at 11:47 AM
“I’m not going to piss myself. I’m going to commit an act of violence.”
“I’m sorry babe you just got nutted in and probably don’t want to hear self defense talk”
April 9, 2025 at 6:36 PM
“I’m sorry babe you just got nutted in and probably don’t want to hear self defense talk”
“If you’re not lamenting like Achilles, do you even care?”
Edited by request
Edited by request
March 22, 2025 at 9:20 PM
“If you’re not lamenting like Achilles, do you even care?”
Edited by request
Edited by request
“I have a similar thought with oranges… in a sock.”
March 15, 2025 at 8:26 PM
“I have a similar thought with oranges… in a sock.”
“Waking yourself up with electronics not very ancient human pilled, not very ice age core.”
March 13, 2025 at 1:29 PM
“Waking yourself up with electronics not very ancient human pilled, not very ice age core.”
“I need a spray bottle for people because what the fuck possessed you to say that?”
March 12, 2025 at 12:07 PM
“I need a spray bottle for people because what the fuck possessed you to say that?”
“This year we are allowing ourselves to yell and scream at people.We are holding space for me tearing your head off verbally.”
March 6, 2025 at 8:22 PM
“This year we are allowing ourselves to yell and scream at people.We are holding space for me tearing your head off verbally.”
Him: “They’re gay. They can’t drive.”
Followed by
Also him: “You are a tried and true homosexual. You can’t even take a left turn.”
Followed by
Also him: “You are a tried and true homosexual. You can’t even take a left turn.”
February 15, 2025 at 11:42 PM
Him: “They’re gay. They can’t drive.”
Followed by
Also him: “You are a tried and true homosexual. You can’t even take a left turn.”
Followed by
Also him: “You are a tried and true homosexual. You can’t even take a left turn.”
Him: “You look like a gnome with your red hood.”
Me: *does the neurodivergent stance or whatever it’s called*
Him:“You’re not beating the gnome allegations. Go look in the mirror”
😐
Me: *does the neurodivergent stance or whatever it’s called*
Him:“You’re not beating the gnome allegations. Go look in the mirror”
😐
February 15, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Him: “You look like a gnome with your red hood.”
Me: *does the neurodivergent stance or whatever it’s called*
Him:“You’re not beating the gnome allegations. Go look in the mirror”
😐
Me: *does the neurodivergent stance or whatever it’s called*
Him:“You’re not beating the gnome allegations. Go look in the mirror”
😐
Him: “Look at that dirt mound. I wanna climb that shit. If it’s still there the next full moon I’m doing it.”
Me: *laughs*
Him: “What you can’t tell me that shit isn’t imposing”
Me: *laughs*
Him: “What you can’t tell me that shit isn’t imposing”
February 12, 2025 at 12:44 PM
Him: “Look at that dirt mound. I wanna climb that shit. If it’s still there the next full moon I’m doing it.”
Me: *laughs*
Him: “What you can’t tell me that shit isn’t imposing”
Me: *laughs*
Him: “What you can’t tell me that shit isn’t imposing”
“I’m going to really abuse you now.”
*proceeds to kiss my belly so I get tickled by mustache hairs*
*proceeds to kiss my belly so I get tickled by mustache hairs*
February 11, 2025 at 6:40 PM
“I’m going to really abuse you now.”
*proceeds to kiss my belly so I get tickled by mustache hairs*
*proceeds to kiss my belly so I get tickled by mustache hairs*
“Look at this stupid bitch. Texting and eating an apple while driving. Are you a sunny in Philadelphia bit?”
February 10, 2025 at 6:42 PM
“Look at this stupid bitch. Texting and eating an apple while driving. Are you a sunny in Philadelphia bit?”
“Are you dating a dwarf or something? Or a dragon who wants a hoard of gold and swords?”
February 8, 2025 at 11:52 PM
“Are you dating a dwarf or something? Or a dragon who wants a hoard of gold and swords?”
“I’m better than most boyfriends but the bar is in hell”
February 8, 2025 at 1:06 PM
“I’m better than most boyfriends but the bar is in hell”
Me-“I got a lot on my mind”
Him-“You know what you can do to change that?”
Me-”What?”
Him-“Think about historical pottery”
😐
Him-“You know what you can do to change that?”
Me-”What?”
Him-“Think about historical pottery”
😐
February 8, 2025 at 12:38 AM
Me-“I got a lot on my mind”
Him-“You know what you can do to change that?”
Me-”What?”
Him-“Think about historical pottery”
😐
Him-“You know what you can do to change that?”
Me-”What?”
Him-“Think about historical pottery”
😐
“There are a bunch of men playing chivalry right now, wishing they could lay down next to a woman.”
February 7, 2025 at 9:36 PM
“There are a bunch of men playing chivalry right now, wishing they could lay down next to a woman.”
Me: I don’t know how to spell
Him: You are not doing right by women😐
Him: You are not doing right by women😐
January 30, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Me: I don’t know how to spell
Him: You are not doing right by women😐
Him: You are not doing right by women😐
Reposted by UnhingedBfComments
“So pitch movie to Adam Sandler…felt puppet characters story of Moses but all of them are new Englander Jews but Moses specifically from Maine.”
December 21, 2024 at 4:00 PM
“So pitch movie to Adam Sandler…felt puppet characters story of Moses but all of them are new Englander Jews but Moses specifically from Maine.”
“A handjob from a woman who milks goats”
December 27, 2024 at 1:06 PM
“A handjob from a woman who milks goats”