unboiled-milk.bsky.social
@unboiled-milk.bsky.social
Birthed by meat da boy. I ordered my milk, sans bone. Facts about healthy, undeadly milk. Also satire facts on my listeria days.
Fact: milk contains a chemical known as telescopoline. Eagles who have been given this have been found with telescopic vision. This is one of the many things stolen by boiling our milk. Save your eagle vision!!
January 15, 2025 at 3:45 PM
Claim: Louis Pasteur created the process of killing potentially deadly microbes, making milk safe to drink.

Fact: boiling milk bonds non-batazine with telekenine. This deadly chemical draws the attention of the Yautja. Don't let yourself become the trophies of Alien trophy hunters!
December 8, 2024 at 1:09 AM
Fact: every person who has drank pasteurized milk, will, some day die.

Don't prevent your immortality!!
December 6, 2024 at 3:35 AM
Fact: boiling milk causes the release googazine. Milk boiling on large scale can actually disrupt internet waves, the energy that carries our information. Don't lose your information!!

Don't kill your milk, unboil your mind!
December 5, 2024 at 10:07 AM
Claim: Pasturization kills Listeria.

Fact: boiling milk kills a bacteria known as telekinine. This bacteria causes telekinesis in children up to 27.

Together we can build a psychic future!
December 5, 2024 at 7:31 AM
It is a known fact that boiling milk is dangerous and potentially deadly. Doing so produces a chemical known to science as non-batazine. This chemical repels bats and makes you invisible to the batman; making you %100 more likely of being crimed.
December 4, 2024 at 8:52 AM