—used to pushing people away using her anger before her mother had died. Her anger used to cause her to hold people closer, but she had changed a lot since then, and so had the world she was living in.

—accidentally bumped into a metal plate being used to lay out seeds. She cringed as the sound of metal hitting the floor echoed throughout the room.

After a brief moment, she stood up straight and looked over at Alessia with a wariness mixed with a bit of anger on her face. She hadn’t been—

—guard. She wouldn’t have expected someone from a career district to have songs. She always just saw them as tailored soldiers, brought up to kill anyone from any ‘lesser’ district. No fun allowed.

She wanted to make her way out, worried that she was intruding on a personal moment when she—

—her, and she was still trying to get used to being underground most of the time. She felt trapped and suffocated by the soil above them. She hated it, so she hated Alessia even tho she knew it wasn’t fair.

Her interest did peak when she heard the other start singing which also caught her off—

—and not be seen by Alessia, forcing herself to shrink back into the corner even more in an attempt to avoid her.

—greenhouse, sitting on the floor with her knees pulled up to her chest when she heard Alessia enter which caused her heartbeat to quicken. She had been avoiding everyone, and was definitely not interested in seeing the other woman.

She sat in her spot, hoping that she would be able to blend in—

ㅤ

we hug now
sydney rose

“it’s occasional, sometimes, i’ll see the moon and i’ll think of you.”

“sometimes, i go to sleep and i’m 17. you still live down my street.”

“and you’re not wasting time stuck here like me.”

“the world ended when it happened to me.”

ㅤ

bsky.app/profile/twac...

—horizon, inducting that she needed to leave, so she stood up on wobbly legs, face red and puffy and made her way back to her house where her mom was surly worried sick. With the state Bonny Sky had been in, she didn’t blame her.

—mud.

“Come back.” She whispered, pleading with whatever or whoever was listening.

She didn’t know how long it had been until the sun was peaking out from the—

—she was crying more than she had been singing, the sound of her sobs more notable among the trees than her song. She rolled over onto her side, gripping the dried dirt that would eventually turn into grass above his grave, her tears turning the dirt below her face to—

—him?

“𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘮 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘥𝘰𝘷𝘦
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦
𝘙𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦
𝘐𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦”

By the time she was finished with the song—

—the lake in the summer.

She would never experience any of that again. She’d never hear him tell her he loved her, smell his scent or cuddle with him as they fell asleep again. How could he expect her to live without—

—around her, protecting her from the outside world that always seemed to want to kill everything in its path. She thought about how he looked at her when they would sit under the stars and just talk until they fell asleep. She thought about how the sun would shine off his back while they swam in—

—the harder it was for her to sing it. The song being broken up by momentary sobs as she looks up at the Moon above her, singing to him or singing to no one at all.

She thought about the feeling of his arms wrapped tightly—

—parts.

“𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘸𝘴
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘦𝘴
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺'𝘴 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘳𝘶𝘯 𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘦
𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘮 𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘳
𝘙𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦
𝘐𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦”

The farther she got into the song,—

—this soil with him. But all of her belonged to him, so she supposed she had lost her entire being.

I’m that moment, she didn’t feel like she’d ever be able to cry all the tears she had to cry over his death. Crying felt both inevitable and infinite in equal—

—Couldn’t happen.

Ever since she had seen him die on the small screen in the living area of his house, alongside his mother and older brother, it had felt as if she had died as well. That she had lost the part of herself that belonged to him, and it was buried in—