Smilin’ Jack Sampson
@tsampson.bsky.social
Wasted the last 15 years of my life over on the other app, wasting the next 15 here.
That feeling when you’re dying and sad that you don’t get to play video games anymore, but relieved you don’t have to do a bunch of lame stuff anymore either.
October 22, 2025 at 11:39 PM
That feeling when you’re dying and sad that you don’t get to play video games anymore, but relieved you don’t have to do a bunch of lame stuff anymore either.
Oh, so it’s like a Green Book year the Nobel Prizes this year.
October 11, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Oh, so it’s like a Green Book year the Nobel Prizes this year.
Highest score wins now.
September 1, 2025 at 2:20 PM
Highest score wins now.
Biggest sitcom downgrade ever.
August 28, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Biggest sitcom downgrade ever.
DC drivers hearing this news:
August 14, 2025 at 11:52 AM
DC drivers hearing this news:
Hey theater kids, you know that new vocal warm-up you’ve been looking for? Well listen to this!
July 29, 2025 at 12:32 AM
Hey theater kids, you know that new vocal warm-up you’ve been looking for? Well listen to this!
I feel terrible for this kid now, but I’m so jealous of how much he’s going to enjoy pulling the plug on his dumb asshole mom one day.
July 26, 2025 at 5:47 PM
I feel terrible for this kid now, but I’m so jealous of how much he’s going to enjoy pulling the plug on his dumb asshole mom one day.
You’ve inherited a movie theater, what’s your first double feature?
Nixon (1995) and Secret Honor (1984). I didn’t take over this theater to be profitable!
Nixon (1995) and Secret Honor (1984). I didn’t take over this theater to be profitable!
July 21, 2025 at 12:26 AM
You’ve inherited a movie theater, what’s your first double feature?
Nixon (1995) and Secret Honor (1984). I didn’t take over this theater to be profitable!
Nixon (1995) and Secret Honor (1984). I didn’t take over this theater to be profitable!
I have nothing to add to the Colbert thing other than to point out that one of Paramount’s 3(?!) co-CEO’s once chose to dress and be photographed like this for a major magazine.
July 18, 2025 at 2:41 PM
I have nothing to add to the Colbert thing other than to point out that one of Paramount’s 3(?!) co-CEO’s once chose to dress and be photographed like this for a major magazine.
Delighted and honored to be a finalist in the annual poster contest held by the Independent Picture House, a great non-profit theater operated by the Charlotte Film Society. Please go and vote for your favorite! tr.ee/p6BwwU4rak
June 2, 2025 at 11:16 PM
Delighted and honored to be a finalist in the annual poster contest held by the Independent Picture House, a great non-profit theater operated by the Charlotte Film Society. Please go and vote for your favorite! tr.ee/p6BwwU4rak
Quick question, who are the dogs in bluey at war with?
May 21, 2025 at 10:44 PM
Quick question, who are the dogs in bluey at war with?
It’s not just the new Pope who’s from Chicago, check out the new Sistine Chapel Choir:
May 8, 2025 at 6:17 PM
It’s not just the new Pope who’s from Chicago, check out the new Sistine Chapel Choir:
Wikipedia never tried to tell me soy was non-vegan.
April 27, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Wikipedia never tried to tell me soy was non-vegan.
General Mills worker #1: “Oh no! This whole batch of Kix went moldy and the Bluey marketing team will be here any minute. What are we going to do?”
General Mills worker #2: “You just leave that to me…”
General Mills worker #2: “You just leave that to me…”
February 20, 2025 at 8:16 PM
General Mills worker #1: “Oh no! This whole batch of Kix went moldy and the Bluey marketing team will be here any minute. What are we going to do?”
General Mills worker #2: “You just leave that to me…”
General Mills worker #2: “You just leave that to me…”
What I read in 2023.
Not my most prolific year of reading, what with raising a 2-year-old and all, but I am proud to have finished Robert Caro’s LBJ series (now I just need him to do the same).
Also, I became a guy who reads short stories this year!
Not my most prolific year of reading, what with raising a 2-year-old and all, but I am proud to have finished Robert Caro’s LBJ series (now I just need him to do the same).
Also, I became a guy who reads short stories this year!
December 30, 2023 at 11:24 PM
What I read in 2023.
Not my most prolific year of reading, what with raising a 2-year-old and all, but I am proud to have finished Robert Caro’s LBJ series (now I just need him to do the same).
Also, I became a guy who reads short stories this year!
Not my most prolific year of reading, what with raising a 2-year-old and all, but I am proud to have finished Robert Caro’s LBJ series (now I just need him to do the same).
Also, I became a guy who reads short stories this year!
Just had an idea for a Simpsons episode where Homer’s likeness is appropriated by a Japanese consumer product.
September 25, 2023 at 11:30 AM
Just had an idea for a Simpsons episode where Homer’s likeness is appropriated by a Japanese consumer product.
What I scream as I violently swerve off a country road toward a sign that reads, “Fresh Apple Cider Donuts.”
September 24, 2023 at 4:41 PM
What I scream as I violently swerve off a country road toward a sign that reads, “Fresh Apple Cider Donuts.”
Why does she have secret service muppets? Is she under threat of assassination on Sesame Street?
September 23, 2023 at 7:47 PM
Why does she have secret service muppets? Is she under threat of assassination on Sesame Street?
Reading every quote from that New Yorker Mattel Films piece in her voice.
July 4, 2023 at 1:04 PM
Reading every quote from that New Yorker Mattel Films piece in her voice.