Bonus points for funnyness if it has Dismas making Reynauld a candle and the thing immediately lights when he hands it over and no one addresses this

*fabricated
Confounded auto correct

He was lawful evil (in a "why is this my problem?" sort of way), he was known as the most punchable man in the party because he just sucked at negotiations even when actively trying to be nice, and he's convinced there is a fabrication cucumber shortage he is indirectly responsible for (not true)

He actually kept yelling at him to heal himself back up to full, gave the half-elf a potion to do so, because the diplomat wanted him at full so he could take his time enjoying slowly chipping away at his hp for fun

This goblin also fucking transcended timelines to go hunt a different version of this half-elf from a different reality to try to get this half-elf to be scared of him! The half-elf wasn't even an alchemist in that one, he was a fucking bard!!

A reoccurring thing with that campaign was us going "it's been like 4 days in game where is that little bastard? DM don't you lie we know he's stalking his boyfriend"

Some highlights include
- "gifting" the half-elf zombie deer
- deleting the half-elf's knees with the sword
- calling the half-elf his boyfriend
- biting his hand when the half-elf was trying to help him during a "truce"
- beefed with a biblically accurate angel for making the half-elf kneel

This guy was armed with a radioactive sword (long story, mainly our own fault) and was a sentient undead so he just kept setting up traps and ambushes to try to catch my half-elf and kept being pissed when the half-elf really just wasn't interested in playing along

We never learned this goblin's name, dm confirmed he had a name we just never got a chance to ask because he was hunting me for sport every time he showed up, so we just called him by his job before becoming a zombie. Goblin Diplomat.

I can't actually remember if I have rambled about the diplomat on here but it was an immortal zombie goblin that was obsessed with hunting my half-elf alchemist for sport because he wanted to see this man with a flat affect kneel and be afraid of him

Update: she called skittle a slur and her entire account was deleted for bullying and hate speech from the looks of it

It had been a very long day and I was already out of mental spoons and I wasn't ready for that. I got to go home and eat pizza afterwards and play games with my siblings but I was very clearly post meltdown at checkout. Probably the only good one I've had.

I grabbed only small stuff at that point because I'm between paychecks and shen she just had me load an expensive measuring cup and I was like "I can't get that right now" and she just went "yeah, you're not because I am" and then I got very overwhelmed as she kept putting things in the cart

So expect some streams to start up in December. Potentially a cooking stream since I have much of that to do anyway. Maybe some stuff with my siblings since they are also big nerds and want to stream with me. I'm glad to be back.