Jords 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈
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transalchemist7.bsky.social
Jords 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈
@transalchemist7.bsky.social
Trans, queer 🍉 energetic kinesiologist 🌀Breaking binaries, disrupting systems. Complex trauma & abuse recovery.
Writing a memoir
I had no bruising nor broken bones to prove there was abuse.

Does that mean the abuse never happened?

Is that still the only way people can fathom that abusers abuse?
March 29, 2025 at 11:22 PM
Also true for adult abuse survivors 💜
Telling a trauma survivor who has been functionally on their own since they were a kid that they "have" to "reach out" for "relational healing" disrespects & misunderstands their wound.

The only "have to" in trauma recovery is, we have to find a recovery path that works for us.
March 27, 2025 at 2:46 AM
When I left the abuser, I also left behind 12 nieces & nephews, several of whom lived in the same house as me & who I helped raise.

Not to mention leaving behind many others
I love.

It’s a specific kind of grief not many talk about in abuse recovery
March 27, 2025 at 2:45 AM
Chronic pain making all the other complex trauma stuff even harder.
Not a good day
March 23, 2025 at 4:03 AM
Not all abusers are cis men

My abuser ex is a cis woman.

That cisnormativ, heteronormative framing about abusers erases the experiences of many LGBTQIA+ abuse survivors
🏳️‍🌈💜🏳️‍⚧️
March 9, 2025 at 5:07 AM
The binaried, hierarchical structuring of patriarchy has no place when approaching how
a body functions…

Nor on the impacts of trauma & abuse on a body

That structuring creates MORE limitation
March 2, 2025 at 10:38 PM
The nervous system being safe to take up space after leaving an abuser is a multilayered endeavour
February 28, 2025 at 10:51 PM
The ever increasing debilitation of the impacts of complex trauma after abuse, are forcing me to reassess my capacities in my work life.

And I’m frustrated & disappointed & grieving.

I am absofuckinglutely great at this somatic energetic kinesiology thing I do.
👇
February 25, 2025 at 12:45 AM
What didn’t happen after you left the abuser, can have just as much impact for an abuse survivor as what happened when you were
WITH the abuser.
February 20, 2025 at 11:14 PM
Might be controversial;

That whole ‘find your community’ can be quite ableist.

What if the most community you ever felt was when everyone HAD to be online & then all those people disappeared.

There are a multitude of reasons why people with disabilities aren’t part of/ included in community
February 19, 2025 at 11:07 PM
Gaslighting an abuse survivor sounds like;

‘You survived 100% of your darkest days’

And other spiritually bypassing/ toxic positivity horrors.

That shite is belittling & dismissive & JUST DON’T
February 17, 2025 at 11:24 PM
My ex used sleep deprivation as an abuse tactic throughout our 13 1/2 yr relationship

She would say that if I loved & cared about her, it would be no effort for me to stay awake
February 14, 2025 at 11:31 PM
PSA for all swept up in ‘Let Them’ book by Mel Robbins…

Mel fails to mention that;

LET THEM was originally a poem
by Cassie Phillips
February 12, 2025 at 11:42 PM
Folks often do not comprehend
that having people to CO-REGULATE with (to help your nervous system) can be a
privileged position for you to be in
February 12, 2025 at 3:20 AM
Capitalism creates urgency & scarcity

Urgency & scarcity keep your nervous system on high alert in survival modes;
• Fight mode
• Flight mode
• Freeze mode
• Fawning (people pleasing)
February 11, 2025 at 9:59 PM
Very stuck writing this part of the memoir.
February 9, 2025 at 12:24 AM
I was unaware that the myriad of elements of emotional & psychological abuse I
experienced from the abuser,
were abuse, when I was with her.

It took years to realise that it was abuse.

And I’m still unpacking it & navigating the impacts.
February 8, 2025 at 12:24 AM
I am trans & gender queer, my pronouns are
they/ them 🏳️‍⚧️

Nonbinary applies to gender

And.

It challenges the limitations of the binary inherent in systems & ways of approaching experiences as a whole👇
February 6, 2025 at 11:01 PM
The brain likes what is familiar, even if the familiar causes harm.

The nervous system knows how to function in that familiarity & anything else feels like a threat to the nervous system.

It takes safe space, time & energy for the body to be SAFE to navigate the unfamiliar.
February 6, 2025 at 12:24 AM
Modalities that perpetuate the myth that being present is always ‘best’, may not understand the impacts of complex trauma, and/ or abuse
👇
February 5, 2025 at 12:31 AM
Abuse survivors need all levels of support;
Physically
Emotionally
Psychologically
Spiritually
Financially

We need community

Unfortunately, too many end up isolated & alone in the aftermath, often years, decades after.
January 30, 2025 at 9:37 PM
On complex trauma after abuse;

Ongoing learning to not be ashamed of the debilitating, disabling daily impacts & reduced capacity.

Gotta stop comparing the capacity of my present self to my ginormous capacity before the abuse.
January 30, 2025 at 12:50 AM
Gaslighting is an essential ingredient to oppression….

Whether that oppression is happening;
*to an individual
*in a family
*in an institution
*in a government
*to a people.
January 26, 2025 at 10:51 PM
“The oppressor would not be
so strong if he did not have accomplices amongst the oppressed”
Simone de Beauvoir
January 26, 2025 at 3:21 AM
Invasion day

Pay the rent 🖤❤️💛
January 25, 2025 at 11:26 PM