If it wasn't for Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider would still be working on his "tight five" for open mic night at Comic Strip Live (while hoping he doesn't get fired from his day job as Macy's oldest stock boy).

This brand new set arrived yesterday. It's where I'll be, if you need me.

What's with her lips? Did she French kiss a black hole?

Trees are better people than the people in the photos. More lifelike, too.

I don't know. Is "KWOUKUXX" a word? Actually, it was "creative".

It's not really a word salad. It's more like a corned beef hash of stupidity.

What makes you think that there isn't a stripper pole in the Lincoln bedroom? Musk had to practice somewhere.

I'm pretty sure that second one is the photo from his driver's license.

I worked with a woman whose lunch was stolen on almost a daily basis. So, one day, she made a sandwich that may have had some waste from her baby's diaper in it. It was the last time her lunch went missing.

Anything she makes is a very loose definition of "food".

How come nobody told me potatoes come in a can? I am both disgusted and fascinated by someone who can't cook and chop up an actual potato. You know, like from the produce section. I'm sure she's at least seen a picture of one.