I was so fucking excited to stream tonight for the first time in months but my internet just completely fucked itself and shat the bed entirely into the realm of unusable. My 500mbps became 5 before crashing to 0 and then went back and forth between these till my stream just crashed...

Someone please tell me when these geriatric, money hungry, waste of fucking SKIN AND OXYGEN get a BlueSky account so I can AIR MY GRIEVANCES!!! I would call their support hotline but the last lady I spoke to about my modem not working at all gave me attitude for saying "no, it is not working."

The only feedback I could give this terrible excuse for an internet "provider" (in quotes because they barely PROVIDE THE INTERNET AT ALL!!!) is to GO AWAY and let an actually competent ISP run some lines so these people in my town can GET ON WITH THEIR LIVES!!!

SO, to tally up: I have cable I do not use (it has been 3 months and I have yet to watch TV), slower speeds, and utterly terrible and unreliable ping, all for MORE MONEY!!!

I asked my property manager if I could not pay for cable and just get an internet plan and they straight up told me no, my only option was to upgrade to a higher tier bundle but I am required to have their cable.

Firstly, I am REQUIRED, thanks to a contract they have with my HOA, to buy a $90 bundle from Spectrum that includes 500mb speeds and a cable package with about 1000 channels I will never use.

Bush***

Important clarification: I must be able to order it BY NAME, with NO explanation by me, for it to count as a "Secret Menu." If I have to order by saying like "can I please get a 5-layer burrito but substitute the cheese for guacamole" then it's NOT A SECRET MENU, it's just a SUBSTITUTION!!!

If it cannot be purchased from a restaurant with regular human money with no additional construction efforts by me, the consumer, then it DOES NOT COUNT AS A SECRET MENU! At that point, it's just a damn weekend renovation project.

Anyway, happy Sunday or whatever, I'm making potatoes.

Now people are like "hey man, have you tried the McDongus on the McDonald's Secret Menu?! It is so good! So all you have to do is order 4 McChickens and a McDouble and nuggets and then put the McChickens inside the McDouble with the nuggets!" Motherfuckers THAT IS JUST ORDERING MULTIPLE FOODS!!!

In-N-Out had an actual Secret Menu where if you asked for certain things in certain ways, you could get food not normally listed in the menu, like animal fries and shit. Now they just have that shit listed online but it WAS a true secret menu.

Important clarification: I must be able to order it BY NAME, with NO explanation by me, for it to count as a "Secret Menu." If I have to order by saying like "can I please get a 5-layer burrito but substitute the cheese for guacamole" then it's NOT A SECRET MENU, it's just a SUBSTITUTION!!!

If it cannot be purchased from a restaurant with regular human money with no additional construction efforts by me, the consumer, then it DOES NOT COUNT AS A SECRET MENU! At that point, it's just a damn weekend renovation project.

Anyway, happy Sunday or whatever, I'm making potatoes.

I mean, any visual effects like captions and stuff would be cool but I can't ask for that much effort from someone for nothing but the promise of future pay. I have some music I like to use for the end of videos for the title card but that's a my side thing.

If you're seriously, I'd love to dm you!

Honestly, I just wanna cut the 3 hour vods down to like 20-30 minute videos of just the funny/interesting shiz that I can upload to YouTube.