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THE WIRE
@thewire.784studios.net
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THE WIRE is the worlds only trustworthy source of news in our rotting society.

THE WIRE is the news publication of 784 STUDIOS

Parent company: https://784studios.net @784studios.net
Read more at https://784studios.net/en/wire

"Mundus Putridus Est"
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thewire.784studios.net
LATEST HEADLINES (23/11/2025)
LATEST IN THE NEWSWIRE FAMILY DEBATING WHO MOVED COUCH FROM REALLY GOOD SPOT (LOCAL PAGE 317) CLOROX COMPANY INTRODUCES NEW LINE OF CONSUMABLE PRODUCTS (NATIONAL PAGE 333) MEASLES: "GUESS WHO'S BACK AGAIN?" LATEST IN THE NEWSWIRE: DID MIKU DRIVE A 2011 TOYOTA COROLLA DURING MIKUNOPOLIS? (INVESTIGATIVE PAGE 350) HOW TO MOST EFFECTIVELY USE YOUR FREE WILL (EDITORIAL PAGE 390) APPLE COMPUTER INC INVENTS NEW KIND OF CONDOM (TECHNOLOGY 360)
November 24, 2025 at 12:36 AM
thewire.784studios.net
TOP HEADLINE TODAY (20/11/2025)
THE WIRE (page 1 of 6) TOP HEADLINE TODAY THIS QUARTER OF YEAR GOOD QUARTER FOR TOUCHING GRASS, FREAK Cloudflare, the largest company that operates critical web infrastructure, had issues 2 days ago. With the current degrading state of the Internet, now is a good time to venture outside and touch grass. There's absolutely no excuse not to do this anymore. If the Internet were to inevitably go down, at least you can depend on grass for entertainment. More on this topic tonight at midnight on THE WIRE NIGHTLY TELEVISION NEWS only on Channel 7 and Netcast Latest headlines follow on next page. READ THE WIRE ON-LINE AT https://784studios.net/en/wire Fastext: Local (red), Regional (green), National (yellow), World (blue)
November 20, 2025 at 6:36 PM
thewire.784studios.net
WEATHER REPORT (11/11/25)
THE WIRE weather page on AIRTXT Partly fucking cloudy Rain chance: I will kill if any Air quality: Uncontamined, for now Wind: Pray (3) Humid: Normal (82) UV index: what the fuck you want me to do Temp: 77F High: 84F Low: 70F Feel: 77F Weatherman says: "Oh fuck guess what? It's partly fucking cloudy."
November 15, 2025 at 1:03 AM
thewire.784studios.net
LATEST HEADLINES ON AIRTXT
Latest headlines on THE WIRE on AIRTXT: TRUMP: "NEW BALLROOM WILL SOLVE ALL NATIONAL PROBLEMS" (page 335) EAIT CORP CLEARLY DESPISES HUMANKIND (page 336)
November 15, 2025 at 12:25 AM
thewire.784studios.net
TODAY'S WEATHER REPORT (24/10/2025)
AIRTXT Screenshot: THE WIRE WEATHER SUBPAGE 1 OF 3 Still Raining Rain Chance: None, for now (57) Air quality: Breathable (16) Wind: A draft (7) Humid: Like clockwork (91) UV Index: Too many clouds (1) Temp: 73F High: 80F Low: 71F Feel: 75F Weatherman says: "Atmosphere is being merciful this morning and not creating rain until you get to work or 8:15 AM, whichever is earlier." UPDATED: 10:25 @649 21/10/2025
October 24, 2025 at 11:34 AM
thewire.784studios.net
"MEASLES: "GUESS WHO'S BACK AGAIN?"" (PAGE 334 ON AIRTXT)

FULL ARTICLE NOW RELEASED:
784studios.net/en/wire#meas...
MEASLES: "GUESS WHO'S BACK AGAIN?" 16/10/25 — After being dormant from most of the nation for 25 years, Measles, the notorious highly contagious airborne transmitted disease, has reportedly returned. "I'm back, and I'm about to make it everyone's problem!" shouted the disease from the rooftops.
October 23, 2025 at 8:55 PM
thewire.784studios.net
MACHINES 40% MORE EFFICIENT IN NOT GIVING A SHIT

FULL ARTICLE NOW RELEASED:
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MACHINES 40% MORE EFFICIENT IN NOT GIVING A SHIT A recent NRU investigative research has shown that machines are 40% more efficient at not giving a shit about their job than humans are, especially when the machine is positioned at a minimum wage job position.
October 23, 2025 at 8:55 PM
thewire.784studios.net
"CLOROX COMPANY INTRODUCES NEW LINE OF CONSUMABLE PRODUCTS" (PAGE 333 ON AIRTXT)

FULL ARTICLE NOW RELEASED:
784studios.net/en/wire#clor...
HEADLINE: CLOROX COMPANY INTRODUCES NEW LINE OF CONSUMABLE PRODUCTS 14/10/25 — The Clorox Company earlier today unveiled a revolutionary line of consumable bleach, touted as “a step forward in the hygienic products market.” According to sources, the product promises to “cleanse impurities both inside and outside,” and may also “improve minor psychic abilities, cognitive function, and interpersonal charm.” Experts have not yet confirmed these claims, but Clorox assures the public that everything is completely safe.
October 22, 2025 at 5:28 PM
thewire.784studios.net
TODAY'S WEATHER REPORT (22/10/2025)
AIRTXT Screenshot: THE WIRE WEATHER SUBPAGE 1 OF 3 Still Raining Rain Chance: Like, lots (82) Air quality: Breathable (19) Wind: Jack shit (11) Humid: It's raining (88) UV Index: Too many clouds (5) Temp: 76F High: 80F Low: 72F Feel: 76F Weatherman says: "The rain this time of year seems to be as persistent as those unwanted sex bots that keep following you no matter what." UPDATED: 10:25 @649 21/10/2025
October 22, 2025 at 5:24 PM
thewire.784studios.net
CURRENT WEATHER CONDITIONS IN THE LOCAL AREA
Weather page from THE WIRE on AIRTXT "Rainy but different" Rain: An amount (98) Air Q: Alright I guess (18) Wind: Not enough power (13) Humid: As usual (79) UV I.: Surprisingly not Temp: 79F High: 83F Low: 71F Feel: 84F *Graphic of a rainy cloud* Weatherman says: "For once, the weather is SLIGHTLY different than the past few days." UPDATED: 15:13 @842 20/10/2025
October 20, 2025 at 7:17 PM
thewire.784studios.net
LATEST HEADLINES FROM THE WIRE ON THE AIRTXT SERVICE
AIRTXT TELETEXT SCREENSHOT: Page 1 of 2 Header: The Wire: The only trustworthy source of news in our rotting society. Main content: Measles: "Guess who's back again?" - Page 334 Clorox Company introduces new line of consumable products - Page 333 Study shows no one cares about fucking meme you found on the internet - page 351 See news happening? Email the tipline tipline@784studios.net Fastext links: Local, National, Regional, World Same header and contents of previous image with two changes. Did Miku drive a 2011 Toyota Corolla during Mikunopolis in LA? - Page 350 See news happening worthy of being journaled by THE WIRE? Email our tipline immediately with no further hesitation. tip-thewire@784studios.net We now report the weather see page 305 for weather
October 17, 2025 at 6:12 AM