The Scoop News
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The Scoop News: The Fakest of News : Satirical online magazine operating and satirizing since 1999
Olympic Snowboarders Pretend They are Real Athletes
Olympic Snowboarders Pretend They are Real Athletes
Olympic Snowboarders Pretend They are Real Athletes
thescoopnews.com
February 11, 2026 at 6:08 PM
Olympic Snowboarders Pretend They are Real Athletes
Local Man Upset He Doesn't Find Actress Attractive
Local Man Upset He Doesn't Find Actress Attractive
Local man Jason Newtbury is upset that he does not find the lead actress of a popular show “hot” and is vowing to boycott the show until the actress is replaced with someone Newtbury finds attractive.
thescoopnews.com
February 3, 2026 at 4:15 PM
Local Man Upset He Doesn't Find Actress Attractive
Odd Weather Has Old Man Winter’s Friends and Family Concerned He May be Using Drugs
Odd Weather Has Old Man Winter’s Friends and Family Concerned He May be Using Drugs
Old Man Winter’s family and friends are concerned that his recent erratic behavior may be due to cognitive decline or drug abuse.
thescoopnews.com
January 23, 2026 at 9:23 PM
Odd Weather Has Old Man Winter’s Friends and Family Concerned He May be Using Drugs
Local Conspiracy Theorist Still Waiting to be Right About COVID Vaccine
Local Conspiracy Theorist Still Waiting to be Right About COVID Vaccine
Local conspiracy theorist says he is patiently waiting to be correct about the COVID vaccine killing millions.
thescoopnews.com
January 20, 2026 at 8:38 PM
Local Conspiracy Theorist Still Waiting to be Right About COVID Vaccine
Local Man Switches from Democrat to Right-Wing Conservative After Negative Feedback
Local Man Switches from Democrat to Right-Wing Conservative After Negative Feedback
Local man Eric Blumenthal has changed his political beliefs from Democrat to far right-wing Conservative after receiving some negative feedback on a recent performance review.
thescoopnews.com
January 14, 2026 at 6:50 PM
Local Man Switches from Democrat to Right-Wing Conservative After Negative Feedback
Old Man Remembers Blizzard That Never Happened
From the Archive: DENVER, CO – One of the worst blizzards in Colorado history was nothing compared to the blizzard of 1934 as remembered by local man Wally Nesmith, 92.
From the Archive: DENVER, CO – One of the worst blizzards in Colorado history was nothing compared to the blizzard of 1934 as remembered by local man Wally Nesmith, 92.
Old Man Remembers Blizzard That Never Happened
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thescoopnews.com
January 13, 2026 at 10:48 PM
Old Man Remembers Blizzard That Never Happened
From the Archive: DENVER, CO – One of the worst blizzards in Colorado history was nothing compared to the blizzard of 1934 as remembered by local man Wally Nesmith, 92.
From the Archive: DENVER, CO – One of the worst blizzards in Colorado history was nothing compared to the blizzard of 1934 as remembered by local man Wally Nesmith, 92.
Texas to Begin Requiring Residents to Generate Their Own Power
Texas to Begin Requiring Residents to Generate Their Own Power
After recent winter storms almost completely destroyed Texas’ power grid, the Texas state government has passed a law requiring all residents to generate their own power.
thescoopnews.com
January 12, 2026 at 9:11 PM
Texas to Begin Requiring Residents to Generate Their Own Power
Local Man No Longer Feels Comfortable in His Man-Cave
Local Man No Longer Feels Comfortable in His Man-Cave
Jared Waterton says he does not feel comfortable in his Dallas Cowboys themed man-cave.
thescoopnews.com
January 8, 2026 at 8:41 PM
Local Man No Longer Feels Comfortable in His Man-Cave
KFC Unveils New Drink Cup Made from Chicken
KFC Unveils New Drink Cup Made from Chicken
Fast food chain KFC has announced plans to release a new beverage cup made from fried chicken.
thescoopnews.com
January 7, 2026 at 9:19 PM
KFC Unveils New Drink Cup Made from Chicken
Man Makes Resolution with No Intent to Keep It
Man Makes Resolution with No Intent to Keep It
Man Makes Resolution with No Intent to Keep It
thescoopnews.com
January 6, 2026 at 7:10 PM
Man Makes Resolution with No Intent to Keep It
Local Man Makes New Year's Resolution to Finally Finish Puzzle
Local Man Makes New Year's Resolution to Finally Finish Puzzle
For his New Year’s Resolution, local Man Glenn Ramirez has committed to finishing the jigsaw puzzle he started in 2019.
thescoopnews.com
January 5, 2026 at 7:07 PM
Local Man Makes New Year's Resolution to Finally Finish Puzzle
Nice Gift at White Elephant Exchange Ruins Party
Nice Gift at White Elephant Exchange Ruins Party
An office Christmas party was ruined when an employee brought an expensive bottle of wine to a white elephant gift exchange.
thescoopnews.com
December 22, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Nice Gift at White Elephant Exchange Ruins Party
Consumer Reports Releases Top "Must Have" Toys
From the archive: CHICAGO, IL – Even though this holiday season is supposed to be a retailer’s worst nightmare, Consumer Reports has unveiled its list of the 10 hottest toys that are flying off shelves all over the country.
From the archive: CHICAGO, IL – Even though this holiday season is supposed to be a retailer’s worst nightmare, Consumer Reports has unveiled its list of the 10 hottest toys that are flying off shelves all over the country.
Consumer Reports Releases Top "Must Have" Toys
Consumer Reports Releases Top "Must Have" Toys
thescoopnews.com
December 19, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Consumer Reports Releases Top "Must Have" Toys
From the archive: CHICAGO, IL – Even though this holiday season is supposed to be a retailer’s worst nightmare, Consumer Reports has unveiled its list of the 10 hottest toys that are flying off shelves all over the country.
From the archive: CHICAGO, IL – Even though this holiday season is supposed to be a retailer’s worst nightmare, Consumer Reports has unveiled its list of the 10 hottest toys that are flying off shelves all over the country.
With One “Nice” Kid, Santa Announces Retirement
With One “Nice” Kid, Santa Announces Retirement
With One “Nice” Kid, Santa Announces Retirement
thescoopnews.com
December 18, 2025 at 12:01 AM
With One “Nice” Kid, Santa Announces Retirement
"Luckiest Boy in the World" Celebrates Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza
"Luckiest Boy in the World" Celebrates Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza
Classmates have declared local boy the “luckiest boy in the world” for celebrating Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanza.
thescoopnews.com
December 15, 2025 at 7:47 PM
"Luckiest Boy in the World" Celebrates Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza
Hallmark Channel Releases Seven New Holiday Movies
Hallmark Channel Releases Seven New Holiday Movies
The Hallmark Channel has released its upcoming holiday movie schedule which includes several new holiday movies.
thescoopnews.com
December 12, 2025 at 6:10 PM
Hallmark Channel Releases Seven New Holiday Movies
Expert Offers Seven Winter Holiday Costume Ideas
Expert Offers Seven Winter Holiday Costume Ideas
To assist those still in need of a costume, The Scoop News has surveyed a leading holiday expert and gathered a list of fresh and fun costume ideas.
thescoopnews.com
December 11, 2025 at 7:33 PM
Expert Offers Seven Winter Holiday Costume Ideas
Amazon Warehouse Workers to Get Extra Diaper as Holiday Bonus
Amazon Warehouse Workers to Get Extra Diaper as Holiday Bonus
Amazon warehouse workers across the country will be receiving a special bonus this holiday season in the form of one extra adult diaper.
thescoopnews.com
December 10, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Amazon Warehouse Workers to Get Extra Diaper as Holiday Bonus
Santa Claus Switches Sleigh from Reindeer Power to Electric Power
Santa Claus Switches Sleigh from Reindeer Power to Electric Power
To help offset his carbon footprint, Santa Claus has announced that he has converted his sleigh from reindeer power to electric power.
thescoopnews.com
December 8, 2025 at 6:22 PM
Santa Claus Switches Sleigh from Reindeer Power to Electric Power
Americans Now Allowed to Print Own Money
From the archive: WASHINGTON, D.C. – With the current economic crisis causing fears of a depression, Congress approved President Bush’s economic incentive plan that will allow American citizens the ability to print their own money.
From the archive: WASHINGTON, D.C. – With the current economic crisis causing fears of a depression, Congress approved President Bush’s economic incentive plan that will allow American citizens the ability to print their own money.
Americans Now Allowed to Print Own Money
Americans Now Allowed to Print Own Money
thescoopnews.com
December 5, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Americans Now Allowed to Print Own Money
From the archive: WASHINGTON, D.C. – With the current economic crisis causing fears of a depression, Congress approved President Bush’s economic incentive plan that will allow American citizens the ability to print their own money.
From the archive: WASHINGTON, D.C. – With the current economic crisis causing fears of a depression, Congress approved President Bush’s economic incentive plan that will allow American citizens the ability to print their own money.
Long John Silver’s Buys Oil, Fish in Gulf of Mexico
From the archive: NEW ORLEANS, LA – American fast food company Long John Silver’s has secured exclusive fishing rights in the Gulf of Mexico as it hopes to capitalize on the recent oil spill.
From the archive: NEW ORLEANS, LA – American fast food company Long John Silver’s has secured exclusive fishing rights in the Gulf of Mexico as it hopes to capitalize on the recent oil spill.
Long John Silver’s Buys Oil, Fish in Gulf of Mexico
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thescoopnews.com
December 3, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Long John Silver’s Buys Oil, Fish in Gulf of Mexico
From the archive: NEW ORLEANS, LA – American fast food company Long John Silver’s has secured exclusive fishing rights in the Gulf of Mexico as it hopes to capitalize on the recent oil spill.
From the archive: NEW ORLEANS, LA – American fast food company Long John Silver’s has secured exclusive fishing rights in the Gulf of Mexico as it hopes to capitalize on the recent oil spill.
Local Man Serious About End-of-the-World Bucket List
From the archive: CASPER, WY – A local man told friends and family this week that he is ready to get serious about his bucket list.
From the archive: CASPER, WY – A local man told friends and family this week that he is ready to get serious about his bucket list.
Local Man Serious About End-of-the-World Bucket List
Local Man Serious About End-of-the-World Bucket List
thescoopnews.com
December 2, 2025 at 10:56 PM
Local Man Serious About End-of-the-World Bucket List
From the archive: CASPER, WY – A local man told friends and family this week that he is ready to get serious about his bucket list.
From the archive: CASPER, WY – A local man told friends and family this week that he is ready to get serious about his bucket list.
Father Time Asked to Move End of the World Up
From the archive: SPACE, TIME – A petition has been delivered to Father Time requesting that the end of the world, currently scheduled for 2012, be moved forward.
From the archive: SPACE, TIME – A petition has been delivered to Father Time requesting that the end of the world, currently scheduled for 2012, be moved forward.
Father Time Asked to Move End of the World Up
Father Time Asked to Move End of the World Up
thescoopnews.com
December 1, 2025 at 10:36 PM
Father Time Asked to Move End of the World Up
From the archive: SPACE, TIME – A petition has been delivered to Father Time requesting that the end of the world, currently scheduled for 2012, be moved forward.
From the archive: SPACE, TIME – A petition has been delivered to Father Time requesting that the end of the world, currently scheduled for 2012, be moved forward.
Families Agree to Ignore Last Six Months This Holiday
From the archive: WASHINGTON, DC – American families have unanimously agreed to ignore the last couple months and just enjoy a quiet thanksgiving dinner.
From the archive: WASHINGTON, DC – American families have unanimously agreed to ignore the last couple months and just enjoy a quiet thanksgiving dinner.
Families Agree to Ignore Last Six Months This Holiday
Families Agree to Ignore Last Six Months This Holiday
thescoopnews.com
November 26, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Families Agree to Ignore Last Six Months This Holiday
From the archive: WASHINGTON, DC – American families have unanimously agreed to ignore the last couple months and just enjoy a quiet thanksgiving dinner.
From the archive: WASHINGTON, DC – American families have unanimously agreed to ignore the last couple months and just enjoy a quiet thanksgiving dinner.
CDC Reminds Americans COVID Still a Valid Excuse to Not Visit Family
CDC Reminds Americans COVID Still a Valid Excuse to Not Visit Family
Although severe cases and hospitalizations have decreased in recent months, scientists are the Center for Disease Control (CDC) say that COVID is still a valid excuse to not see relatives at Thanksgiv...
thescoopnews.com
November 25, 2025 at 8:51 PM
CDC Reminds Americans COVID Still a Valid Excuse to Not Visit Family