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thescallywag.bsky.social
thescallywag.bsky.social
@thescallywag.bsky.social
16 followers 38 following 16 posts
Plundering global headlines & rewriting them for scoundrels. 🏴‍☠️ The world’s only news source with a scurvy problem. 🦜 #Satire
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thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓The Grand Papist Tacks Toward the Forbidden Isle: a Peace Most Pious Or a Plot for Pieces of Eight?

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/7207ad5a

#pirate #imperialpolitics #PopeFrancis #Vatican #UnitedStates #Cuba #Pope #TheCaribbean
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February 1, 2026 at 6:35 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓The Great Rent Rescue: Pope Leo XIV Lowers the Anchor on the Cardinal's Coffers

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/9b12ff82

#pirate #imperialpolitics #Vatican #PopeLeoXiv #CardinalRaymondBurke #SaltyBarnaby #EternalCity
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February 1, 2026 at 6:35 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓Amazon Weighs a Mountain of Gold for the Clockwork Oracle of Altman

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/4ad9d251

#pirate #imperialpolitics #Amazon #Openai #JeffBezos #Microsoft #SiliconValley
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February 1, 2026 at 6:33 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓The Great Silicon Siege: Why Our Iron Hulls Matter More Than Our Ghost-brains

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/7d8ce580

#pirate #imperialpolitics #ArtificialIntelligence #WhiteHouse #ChineseCommunistParty #Pentagon #Beijing #UnitedStates #CybersecurityInfrastructure
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pdtffbardwsczdkpyehp.supabase.co
February 1, 2026 at 6:33 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓The Great Council of Land-lubbers Conjures More Fog Over the Port of Cinders

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/70783f73

#pirate #imperialpolitics #UnitedNations #Gaza #SecurityCouncil #MiddleEast #QuartermasterFlint #RedSea #UnitedStates
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February 1, 2026 at 6:32 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓Trump Commands Phase Two: the Scuttling of Arms and the Gilded Rebuilding of the Levant

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/ebb282bf

#pirate #imperialpolitics #DonaldTrump #Gaza #MiddleEast #Hamas #UnitedNations
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February 1, 2026 at 6:31 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓Iron Cannons and Empty Bellies: the Great Plunder of the Global Ledger

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/99437363

#pirate #worldchaos #StockholmInternationalInstitute #GlobalSouth #MilitaryIndustrialComplex #WesternPowers #UnitedNations
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February 1, 2026 at 1:26 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓The Great Gilded Gale: Why the Commodore’s New World Order Spells Doom for the Lone Sailor

📜Read: thescallywag.online/go/786eb9a4

#pirate #worldchaos #DonaldTrump #WesternAlliance #MaritimeLaw #WhiteHouse #EuropeanUnion #GlobalTrade
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February 1, 2026 at 12:17 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ The Dragon’s Map: How the Western Admirals Lost the Compass!

"Avast, ye landlubbers and scurvy ink-stained wretches! Captain Iron Ink here, and I’ve..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/world-chaos/...

#pirate #worldchaos #Washington #Beijing #TheUnitedNations #XiJinping
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pdtffbardwsczdkpyehp.supabase.co
January 28, 2026 at 11:33 AM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ Europe's at It Again, a New Imperial Age Breeds Trouble for Us Buccaneers!

"Shiver me timbers! Captain Iron Ink here, broadcasting live from the grog-soaked deck of t..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/imperial-pol...

#pirate #imperialpolitics
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pdtffbardwsczdkpyehp.supabase.co
January 26, 2026 at 1:03 PM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ The Swiss Stanimal’s Thunderous Broadside at the Great Southern Reef!

"Avast, ye salt-crusted scallywags and court-side landlubbers! Gather ‘round the grog barre..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/sports-duels...

#pirate #sportsduels
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January 26, 2026 at 11:29 AM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ The Brew Is Bitter: Admiral Reyes Prepares His Barque for the San Miguel Maelstrom

"Avast, ye salt-stained landlubbers and court-side bilge-rats! Gather 'round the spirit-keg..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/sports-duels...

#pirate #sportsduels
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January 26, 2026 at 11:28 AM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ A Storm Brews Over the Barbary Coast: the Bloody Duel for the Golden Hoop

"Avast, ye salt-crusted scoundrels and court-side speculators! A foul wind blows from the W..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/sports-duels...

#pirate #sportsduels
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pdtffbardwsczdkpyehp.supabase.co
January 26, 2026 at 11:27 AM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ The Swiss Sledgehammer’s Final Broadside: Wawrinka’s Gritty Farewell to the Southern Seas

"Gather 'round, ye salt-crusted deck-scrubbers and court-side privateers, for a tale of gri..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/sports-duels...

#pirate #sportsduels
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pdtffbardwsczdkpyehp.supabase.co
January 26, 2026 at 11:26 AM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ The Highlight’s Harpoon: Gaethje Sinks the Scouse Schooner to Seize Interim Treasure!

"Gather 'round, ye bilge-rats and gutter-snipes, and pour a heavy draught of the finest gro..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/sports-duels...

#pirate #sportsduels
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January 26, 2026 at 11:25 AM
thescallywag.bsky.social
⚓ The Great Frozen Heist: the Orange Commodore Lays Claim to the North!

"Avast, ye scallywags and ink-stained wretches of the digital tide! Captain Iron Ink here,..."

📜 Read Chronicle: thescallywag.online/imperial-pol...

#pirate #imperialpolitics
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pdtffbardwsczdkpyehp.supabase.co
January 26, 2026 at 9:55 AM