pepsi patriot 🏳️⚧️
@theonlymay.bsky.social
she/her boygirl
i eat calendars & chemicals i found out back
i eat calendars & chemicals i found out back
what do you think the ratio of blood to cum in the balls is
September 12, 2025 at 1:06 AM
what do you think the ratio of blood to cum in the balls is
people be named carol and still not give a damn
September 8, 2025 at 11:20 AM
people be named carol and still not give a damn
people be named carol and still not give a damn
September 7, 2025 at 1:01 AM
people be named carol and still not give a damn
I call your mom my ex the way I play with her box
August 24, 2025 at 7:53 PM
I call your mom my ex the way I play with her box
what's a programmer's favorite drug? codeine
August 20, 2025 at 6:37 AM
what's a programmer's favorite drug? codeine
fucking a man o' war jellyfish but im pissing the entire time so it can't sting me
August 12, 2025 at 6:01 PM
fucking a man o' war jellyfish but im pissing the entire time so it can't sting me
i call my dick my vitamin because its hard to c
August 8, 2025 at 1:49 AM
i call my dick my vitamin because its hard to c
godfather if it was irish: "im going to make him a bomb he can't defuse"
August 5, 2025 at 3:37 AM
godfather if it was irish: "im going to make him a bomb he can't defuse"
If the bomb in Megaton hasn't exploded yet, why is Megaton in a nuclear wasteland? Is Todd Howard stupid?
July 24, 2025 at 5:12 PM
If the bomb in Megaton hasn't exploded yet, why is Megaton in a nuclear wasteland? Is Todd Howard stupid?
if you're a bug, getting taken out by a daddy long legs has to be so humiliating, like at least god could give me the honor of killing me with a real spider
July 24, 2025 at 3:55 PM
if you're a bug, getting taken out by a daddy long legs has to be so humiliating, like at least god could give me the honor of killing me with a real spider
im bipolar which means i get presents from two santas for christmas :>
July 22, 2025 at 7:26 AM
im bipolar which means i get presents from two santas for christmas :>
@garn47.bsky.social im always trying my garndest because deep down i know it'll always be carrite
July 21, 2025 at 6:14 AM
@garn47.bsky.social im always trying my garndest because deep down i know it'll always be carrite
if you're lucid dreaming and get shot in real life you die for real
July 20, 2025 at 10:05 AM
if you're lucid dreaming and get shot in real life you die for real
(tastes droplet off floor) ah yes, fresh cum. he can't be far
July 20, 2025 at 6:12 AM
(tastes droplet off floor) ah yes, fresh cum. he can't be far
making a baby is so cool because i get an excuse to have sex. i'm basically doing research
July 19, 2025 at 11:46 AM
making a baby is so cool because i get an excuse to have sex. i'm basically doing research
wouldn't every plane be a plane of existence? i mean... it's right there
July 16, 2025 at 3:35 PM
wouldn't every plane be a plane of existence? i mean... it's right there
rediscovered this project I gave up on a couple years ago called "the missile doesn't know where it is"
July 15, 2025 at 12:34 PM
rediscovered this project I gave up on a couple years ago called "the missile doesn't know where it is"
rollercoaster euthanasiasts be like "im killing my fucking dog bruh"
July 13, 2025 at 4:12 PM
rollercoaster euthanasiasts be like "im killing my fucking dog bruh"
the hard part of becoming an internet personality is having one
July 13, 2025 at 1:45 PM
the hard part of becoming an internet personality is having one
most people think opossums are mammals but they're actually irish
July 13, 2025 at 1:38 PM
most people think opossums are mammals but they're actually irish
whining like a little bitch probably feels good as fuck to the kettle
July 9, 2025 at 7:56 AM
whining like a little bitch probably feels good as fuck to the kettle
you know what? I DO recognize the bodies in the water. this is MY pool party. cowabunga !
July 8, 2025 at 12:07 PM
you know what? I DO recognize the bodies in the water. this is MY pool party. cowabunga !
it's true that you can find friends on grindr but only the ones that want to have sex with you
July 7, 2025 at 7:40 AM
it's true that you can find friends on grindr but only the ones that want to have sex with you
a peacock is a bird of incredible beauty, and yet it's counterpart the shitass...
July 6, 2025 at 12:59 PM
a peacock is a bird of incredible beauty, and yet it's counterpart the shitass...