Hold on to your hats, keep your chins up, and stick together, Paranet friends. I know it's been rough out there.

Egads.

I'm a very literal man, okay?

Pretty sure he was born grumpy. He'd spit out his pacifier and glare at anyone in eye range.

If I so much as sneezed in the wrong direction, that guy thought it was evidence that I was practicing black magic. Falling on my face was probably reason to whip out the sword and go all Queen of Hearts on my head.

Yeah, once upon a time he would have been taking *detailed* notes about every single time I fell on my face.

Jim's a fair sight better at putting my weird old life into words than I was in my journals, that's for damn sure. Guy knows how to prose.

Oh, you know me. Always playin' it cool. Too cool for school. Except when I fall flat on my face, but who's counting *those* incidents?

Don't answer that.

Have yourself a good Solstice too, Cobble.

Wow. That brings back memories.

No, things are very different for me now. Very, very different.

...Maaaybe.

Yeah, I got a lot of context for things in the periphery, but full immersion is different.

Yeah, that happened too. There may have been a little bit of fire, and sprinkler systems going haywire. That was a bit later, though.

Then we'd break for lunch and cram ourselves into an overcrowded, noisy food court and chow down on greasy hamburgers and lots of fries. We'd plot our next escapades over milk shakes.

This is the kind of stuff memories are made of. Magic.

It was a multifaceted experience. Holistic. Friendship and weekend meanderings and sultry summer days. The tinny, electronic music and explosions and other sound effects swirling around the arcade, and the shouts of excitement when a game was won.

No, I'm a spring chicken. I shake my fist and yell "Get off my lawn!" in a very youthful manner.

What is that sound I hear? It's the theme from Buffy the Vampire Slayer playing in my ear.

Good luck with that, pal. I'm sure you'll do just fine, with all the friends around you who've got your back. Oh, wait. You don't have any friends, do you? Wonder why.

Watch out for this guy, folks. He may look a lot like me, but he's *not* me. Do not engage. Except for petty mockery.