I also think the idea of being a perfected killing machine also has a mix of desire and disgust about it too... "I could protect those I love" has appeal just as "I would lose my soul in pointless violence" is scary (esp with how often toxic masculinity glorified inflicting violence)

tl;dr: to be brainwashed into a hound is to be instrumentalized, and that's something trans women have a unique fear of, because society encourages all of us to instrumentalize ourselves inauthentically as men in service to patriarchy and other hegemonic social forces. that's the thesis, I think

WOW ISN'T THAT CURIOUS

I live in Miku's world now