Tesla Seppanen
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teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Tesla Seppanen
@teslaseppanen.bsky.social
180 followers 220 following 380 posts
Empiricist, now with added guitars, cats, coffee, and bicycles. She/her.
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teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Secretary of State website will offer more up-to-date info: electionresults.sos.ca.gov/returns/ball...
November 5, 2025 at 4:34 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
May 16, 2025 at 4:32 PM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
For a few years now we have had yard crows. The most brazen among them has trained me well: he swoops showily into the yard and perches on the balcony, and I feed him. If I'm too slow for his tastes, he yells briefly to get my attention.
A very large black bird with a prominent hooked beak comes in for a landing on a fountain, wings still outstretched.
April 26, 2025 at 1:23 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Child could not decide whether he wanted a Cosmic Crisp or a Granny Smith apple, so I made him a Cosmic Granny.
An apple on a plate: the left half is bright red and the right half is spring green; there is a sharp vertical line of demarcation between the halves.
April 17, 2025 at 12:20 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Paul Cantrell inthehands@hachyderm.net Companies are refusing to hire our even laying off plumbers because hucksters backed by massive unicorn-chasing investment money time them they can build plumbing faster and cheaper out of cardboard. A few years from now there's going to be a hell of a market for people who can replace cardboard toilets with real ones. And also for people who can replace carpets. And walls and floors. This is a post about LLM-generated code.
April 12, 2025 at 4:32 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Show me 4 pictures in your phone that have your energy that aren’t selfies.
A small waterfall surrounded by ferns flows into a natural pool in the woods In foreground is a clivia miniata: a long-leafed plant with several bright orange flowers. In background, an Arts and Crafts style wood-and-glass door is visible in an exterior wall clad in cedar shakes. A cartoon emoji-style image of a white woman with dark, curly hair and blue eyes wearing a black sweater, throwing her hands up in confusion, with one eyebrow cocked. A famous photograph of Nikola Tesla looking debonair, captioned "Get My Name Off Your Shitty Cars You Nazi Fuck"
April 2, 2025 at 8:01 PM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
This is a violation of Wisconsin election law and should be prosecuted:
docs.legis.wisconsin.gov/statutes/sta...
Screenshot of text from the linked page
March 28, 2025 at 6:49 PM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Oh! Yes, it was "Consumer confidence continues to dim" from March 25.

I think the segment starts at 12:05 in this recording.
March 28, 2025 at 6:11 PM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Well, chat, I think this explains a lot:
Image shows a several cards from "Cards Against Humanity." The black card on the left reads, "When I am President of the United States, I will create the Department of _________________." A loose stack of white cards read, from bottom to top, "Nazis," "Racism," "Alcoholism," "Loose Lips," and "Unfathomable Stupidity."
March 26, 2025 at 4:43 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Now I get it! I didn't realize, some twenty years ago, that Bush was just looking for bottles full of gasoline in Iraq: weapons of mass destruction. Here I thought he expected nuclear or large-scale chemical/biological agents.

But we *were* there for the oil, so suddenly it all makes sense.
Screen grab from a Wikipedia article: "In the early 2000s, U.S. President George W. Bush and British Prime Minister Tony Blair both falsely assets that Saddam [Hussein]'s weapons programs were active and large stockpiles of WMD were hidden in Iraq.
March 25, 2025 at 4:01 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Paper sign with characters that might be in Japanese, below which is an English translation, saying, "DO NOT DUMB HERE. NOT DUMB AREA HERE."
March 24, 2025 at 1:19 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
@votecnp.bsky.social

I'd like to propose that when California secedes we adopt the universal honorific of "dude" to supplant all the weird gendered and archaic ones currently in use.

(May I never be referred to as "Mrs. - I mean Miss - I mean Miz..." again.)
Image shows a screenshot, probably from Facebook, written by prettyflyforayaoguai. Text reads "Having also grown up in California, I can attest that dude can be anything. Males are dude. Females are dude. My phone is dude. That cat over there, it is dude. The green light that only lasts long enough for 1 car to pass is dude. I have called my hair 'dude'. I have called my coffee maker 'dude'. The entire population of the world, and all of their belongings, are all dude."
March 20, 2025 at 12:39 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
March 19, 2025 at 3:56 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
I just encountered these at the grocery store - saw the name, did a double-take, and was deeply disappointed for the duration of my shop. 😢
March 16, 2025 at 9:08 PM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
(Of course I mean "twink" as in RPGs, not the other one)
Screengrab from Wikipedia: " • In massively multiplayer online role-playing games, or MMORPGs, twinking refers to a character gaining equipment with the assistance of a higher level character, particularly by giving the low-level character higher level equipment that is otherwise unattainable."
March 15, 2025 at 5:43 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Yeah, at some point it will probably start yelling at you, and then it will - not even kidding - turn its stereo on in a threatening (?) fashion. All of which runs the battery down faster!
March 15, 2025 at 5:19 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Screenshot of an out-going SMS message saying "Schumer just stuck his head so far up his own ass that he's now a Klein bottle" (timestamp 3:52 pm)
March 13, 2025 at 11:00 PM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Tiptoe Falls:
A lone man standing in the sunlight surrounded by several giant redwoods, looking up toward the sky A small waterfall emptying into a calm natural pool, with ferns and moss growing on the banks
February 27, 2025 at 2:06 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
How I sit waiting for you to realize you've been poisoned:
A tabby-and-white cat lounges casually and stares into the middle distance, one foreleg draped over his human's thigh.
February 23, 2025 at 4:25 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
I'm just saying...
A person wearing full body armor and a helmet with a face shield, looking out of frame, against a grey background. (This is an image of the Bobbie Draper character from The Expanse.) A person wearing full body armor and a helmet with a face shield, looking out of frame, while bracing both arms against opposite walls. (This is an image of the Bobbie Draper character from The Expanse.)
February 21, 2025 at 5:04 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
This photo captures its color better:
February 20, 2025 at 4:01 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
My clematis and lilac vine are in bloom!
February 20, 2025 at 3:54 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Who would have thought that Fortune magazine would show some journalistic integrity while the New York Times fell flat on its face?
A Fortune Magazine headline reads," Some federal workers are 'getting wealthy at taxpayer expense,' says Elon Musk, whose companies have received at least $20 billion from the government" A New York Times headline reads, "Trump Made Chair of Kennedy Center as Its President Is Fired"
February 14, 2025 at 4:29 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
Right there with you.
Screenshot of a bluesky post by @teslaseppanen.bsky.social saying "'Gulf of America'" is the 'freedom fries' of 2025."
February 14, 2025 at 2:59 AM
teslaseppanen.bsky.social
I appreciate the phrasing of your headline, NPR. Referring to the current administration as "it" is an inspired touch.
Screenshot of link to NPR article entitled, "What happens if Trump starts ignoring court rulings? We break it down"
February 12, 2025 at 2:35 PM