TJCgoofs
@teejit.bsky.social
PDX
Cat dad
Cishet asshat
Writer and editor
Just tryin my dang best
https://www.instagram.com/tjcgoofs?igsh=ZXdvMHZsbjFwd3E3
Cat dad
Cishet asshat
Writer and editor
Just tryin my dang best
https://www.instagram.com/tjcgoofs?igsh=ZXdvMHZsbjFwd3E3
Sucks havin a runny nose when both hands are in use and cannot be easily freed up 😤
December 5, 2025 at 10:53 PM
Sucks havin a runny nose when both hands are in use and cannot be easily freed up 😤
You might even say a lie of…Emission
Holding in a fart is a lie of omission
November 24, 2025 at 9:13 PM
You might even say a lie of…Emission
Holding in a fart is a lie of omission
November 24, 2025 at 9:12 PM
Holding in a fart is a lie of omission
“I love [person’s name], but (immediate and devastating evidence to the contrary)”
November 16, 2025 at 3:35 AM
“I love [person’s name], but (immediate and devastating evidence to the contrary)”
Repeating letters in a word for emphasis is wiiiiiiiiiiiild
October 3, 2025 at 7:36 PM
Repeating letters in a word for emphasis is wiiiiiiiiiiiild
Gimme black cherry sparkling water ALL DAY
October 3, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Gimme black cherry sparkling water ALL DAY
Jackie Chan movie and chicken wings and a nice Malbec = my evening
September 29, 2025 at 2:55 AM
Jackie Chan movie and chicken wings and a nice Malbec = my evening
Quick, what’s on the back of a dime? Off the dome. No peeking. GO
September 27, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Quick, what’s on the back of a dime? Off the dome. No peeking. GO
Seems like it should be illegal to be both sleepy and anxious
September 8, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Seems like it should be illegal to be both sleepy and anxious
I can’t find my stud finder. Anyone have a stud finder finder?
August 29, 2025 at 9:56 PM
I can’t find my stud finder. Anyone have a stud finder finder?
Would a respectable MC rhyme “sexual creature” with “architectural feature”? Asking for a friend
August 7, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Would a respectable MC rhyme “sexual creature” with “architectural feature”? Asking for a friend
Matt Damon has played two characters named Carol. Carol Burnett In 30 Rock and Carroll Shelby in Ford vs. Ferrari. So, enjoy that information.
August 5, 2025 at 6:18 AM
Matt Damon has played two characters named Carol. Carol Burnett In 30 Rock and Carroll Shelby in Ford vs. Ferrari. So, enjoy that information.
Boy howdy does peperoncini elevate a sandwich 🥪
July 31, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Boy howdy does peperoncini elevate a sandwich 🥪
Why don’t more world leaders boop each other’s noses
July 28, 2025 at 5:43 PM
Why don’t more world leaders boop each other’s noses
Describing Freakier Friday as a “freakquel” tickles my brain in all the right ways
July 28, 2025 at 2:54 PM
Describing Freakier Friday as a “freakquel” tickles my brain in all the right ways
LesBourne Identitty. Is that anything
July 25, 2025 at 1:15 AM
LesBourne Identitty. Is that anything
What do you mean Lee Pace isn’t British?!?
July 18, 2025 at 5:06 AM
What do you mean Lee Pace isn’t British?!?
Orange bell peppers are slept on
July 17, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Orange bell peppers are slept on
I should be eating more lentils. What am I even doing.
July 13, 2025 at 8:11 PM
I should be eating more lentils. What am I even doing.
Just spent way too much time figuring out the perfect song to play while I scoop the cat litter
June 23, 2025 at 5:56 AM
Just spent way too much time figuring out the perfect song to play while I scoop the cat litter
Why is my algorithm going so hard on apple cider vinegar?
June 22, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Why is my algorithm going so hard on apple cider vinegar?
Why do I feel the urge to throw my phone into the river every time I walk across a bridge
June 20, 2025 at 4:51 AM
Why do I feel the urge to throw my phone into the river every time I walk across a bridge
People with hyphenated first names are cheating. Now sure at what exactly, or for what advantage, but they’re cheating.
June 18, 2025 at 2:19 PM
People with hyphenated first names are cheating. Now sure at what exactly, or for what advantage, but they’re cheating.
I just used 5 separate machines on my head/face. We live in future times.
June 17, 2025 at 8:11 PM
I just used 5 separate machines on my head/face. We live in future times.
It was dark, and I was in bed trying to sleep, but my cat still wanted to play. I told him, “read the room,” but it had little effect
June 14, 2025 at 5:34 AM
It was dark, and I was in bed trying to sleep, but my cat still wanted to play. I told him, “read the room,” but it had little effect