And I liked skunks as much back then as I do now 🩷

Don't ask me why I was a dino for the Christmas play but I was!!!

...the obligatory envelope full of hair 🥲

Ah, apparently in the "important memories" folder in my baby binder, is four separate notes from the doctor prescribing something to make me puke. The final one has the poison control number on it 😂 WHAT WAS I EATING

Also every picture of me looks like this 😂 smug fucking baby

I've also found a letter from my teacher commending my parents on my correct usage and spelling of the word "slither" at age 5 😂 I wonder where Ms Morganstern is now

The first day, there was just a little blue mark right at the top, but day two it looked like it had been drawn on with a pallet sharpie 🫠🫠

Yes they were in little plastic boxes 😂😂 I am fine!

Yeah but I wanted a hot pocket 😂😂

Unfortunately, I was born here, I live here, and I'll die here.