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swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Tortilla Farts, Writer
@swamivonsalami.bsky.social
92 followers 76 following 160 posts
It’s ass.
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swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Kash Patel’s latest single, “Stairway to Valhalla” is now available on iTunes and Spotify.

#MAGA #music
October 15, 2025 at 1:30 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Wow. Madonna is looking rough. Is this because she buried so many dicks back in her day?

#hollywood #death
October 13, 2025 at 11:05 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
“I’m bringing back old fashioned values and hairy 70s-style bushes. No muff too tough.”

- The Jenner, 2025

#burningbush #pubes #America
October 8, 2025 at 11:46 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
@deesnider.bsky.social! Have you heard David Lee Roth sing live recently? He sounds like my asshole after Chinese food. Q: Is it possible that he’s worse than Vince Neil live? Talk to me, Dee. Anyhow, saw your band back in the day. You fuckers were LOUD.
October 5, 2025 at 1:23 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Ok, which one of you freaks fucked the tortillas?

#sex #food
October 3, 2025 at 11:37 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Nice tattoo. Shitty guitar player.

#music #tattoo #KISS
September 30, 2025 at 11:46 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
“Dream now, MAGA Child. Eat Trump’s balls. Then eat his ass. And I’ll see you in Valhalla.”

- Morrison Patel, 2025

#music #FBI #Trump
September 21, 2025 at 1:35 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
“I’ve sailed the Seven Seas and ate a hairy man’s ass on my knees. I’ll see you in Valhalla.”

- Yngwie Patel, coconut-brown Viking

#valhalla #Trump #dead
September 16, 2025 at 11:28 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
STROKAHONTAS! 🇺🇸
September 12, 2025 at 11:36 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Are Trump’s “Sympathies” his dick and balls?

#charliekirk #Utah
September 11, 2025 at 12:35 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Eric Clapton taking a nap before a concert in 2024.

#music #dead
September 5, 2025 at 11:38 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Is it dead, yet? Look, I’m not asking for much. Just wishing for death. Don’t judge me. #sheesh
September 1, 2025 at 6:50 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Sweaty Rudy Giuliani is in critical, but stable condition. As soon as he’s fully recovered he’ll fuck one of his cousins.

#RudyGiuliani #sex
September 1, 2025 at 2:11 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Is it dead, yet? LFG! 💀

#dead #hurry
August 31, 2025 at 10:52 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Football season is here, bitches. Who remembers last year’s Super Bowl when the Eagles smacked the fuck out of the Chiefs? Yes! Good times! #NFL
August 24, 2025 at 11:18 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Cracker Barrel: The old logo sucks balls. Just like our food.

Crackers: 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

#CrackerBarrel #food
August 23, 2025 at 11:10 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
“Mother bitch! Give me that schnitzel!”

“Say less.”

#Newsome #CA
August 22, 2025 at 11:04 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Did Leatherface have combovers painted on those dead white dudes?

#tacodon #dead #gold
August 20, 2025 at 12:10 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
She’s crying a lot.
August 20, 2025 at 12:03 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
“I tried his tacos. They’re shit.”

- Vladimir Putin, 2025

#tacodon #tacotuesday #russia
August 18, 2025 at 11:36 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Is this asshole still doing ALL THE DRUGS? Selfish prick. #drugs #fame
August 14, 2025 at 12:39 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
One last fishing trip before the summer’s done. Open wide, fishies! #sport #fishing
August 12, 2025 at 12:25 AM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Sup.

#Trump #skunk
August 9, 2025 at 8:39 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
The ALL CAPS is definitely going to get the attention of these geriatric patriots!
August 6, 2025 at 1:09 PM
swamivonsalami.bsky.social
Does anyone remember Shannon Sharpe’s huge fucking tongue flopping around inside his mouth? That was weird. #mouth #ESPN
July 31, 2025 at 11:14 PM