and it wasn't like that at first cause tbh when he has less followers and mutuals i felt like i could be part of the community and that i was part of it but now i feel like i'm kinda an outsider

like i get like they were my cousin and friend first and ur not even that funny (even though that joke is something i would say and maybe thats part of it) u suck

and i'm constantly baiting for attention like especially when you know i am that shits annoying ‼️‼️ like even if you know why i do these things it's annoying you can be understanding and nice abt and still be like it's annoying 😭

like i have really bad spirals where i get stuck on this train of thought and repeat it over and over and over and get angry at anyone telling i'm wrong or it's incorrect (it is most of the time) that's annoying like really annoying

i mean i'm sure their fine they just all give me major ick for no reason and sure every time someone has given me that feeling before they turned out to be major assholes that talk shit and bully others and it's happened like 5 separate times but it's surely different this time 😒

needs figure out more interesting fandom asks though 🤔🤔

nvm

i hate when i attached to a person and i can't just be normal about it i just gotta be insanely insecure an assume they hate me

i mean it's fine i understand people have lives and it's just a stupid game but y'know