I’m the most chopped I’ve ever been, and the most snatched I’ll ever be.

When I was in the service, I used to hear stories about retirees living in Thailand off their pension or some money they earned in the US and being king shit of fuck mountain over there and it always sat wrong with me. Folks can do whatever, but isn’t it strange?

I got a tattoo yesterday and i am being the biggest baby about it. It is my 8th but i am limping around like there’s a chunk of my leg missing

DHS set to crack down on anyone singing Winter Wonderland this holiday season, as they are seeking not to let anyone conspire, whether they’re dreaming by a fire or not

I don’t like golf or pickleball I’m sorry, okay?

It seems today that all you see is matcha and labubu and dubai chocolate things
But where are those youthmaxxing values on which we used to rely?
Lucky there’s performative guy

I am pickleball’s biggest hater and I can’t help but have my opinion of a person affected by a desire to play the game.

However, my only argument against the game is effectively an old-man rant, which is “either play Tennis or Ping Pong, not this half-send nonsense”

Risking it all
(Telling a bumble match that my dream vacation is Japan and hoping she knows that i don’t mean it in the weird way)

Accidentally cutting myself on a deli slicer but the slices were so thin that i don’t notice the cut

Was in Taiwan when this happened. The member was objectively right, if i remember correctly.

Here's your LAPD when they think no one's looking

The trump and elon breakup isn’t really amusing to me until they end up at the guillotine.

CTA Pride