Heavy Lobster
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steelcrustacean.bsky.social
Heavy Lobster
@steelcrustacean.bsky.social
The reigning monarch of the crustaceans, ruler of the shelled ones, and dominator of all things crabby.
"This time we will succeed! Heavy Lobster, away!"

TRANSGENDER FEMALE!!!!!
BECAUSE NOBODY EVER REMEMBERS
girl, growing it out ain't the problem (but taking care of it is lol I did NOT do that), my hair just ain't built that way
October 29, 2025 at 11:58 PM
October 14, 2025 at 5:05 PM
me buying my fifteenth living Jockington homunculus from Tony's Merchandise Emporium of Questionable Legality:
October 1, 2025 at 9:59 AM
WUOOOOOHH HOH HO!!!
SEEMS I'VE TAKEN A TUMBLE!!!
September 27, 2025 at 9:03 AM
Silksong spoilers
September 22, 2025 at 1:40 AM
with pleasure!
September 16, 2025 at 7:33 AM
when I'm in a "telling a compelling story over giving the player a good time" competition and my opponent is Sinner's Road (to be fair, it DOES live up to the name):
September 15, 2025 at 9:57 PM
I wouldn't really call it "one of the greatest things ever", but that's just me
September 14, 2025 at 11:33 PM
didn't eat all day so I fucked UP a pepper
September 11, 2025 at 10:01 AM
personally I abide by this particular image provided to me by the Internet randomly
September 11, 2025 at 6:34 AM
something to take the edge off
September 10, 2025 at 3:16 PM
WHAT did you just say?
September 7, 2025 at 1:17 PM
"god nothing's fun anymore"

calling people you despise online "cunts", refusing to engage in their pointless and hateful discussions, and repeatedly condescending to them without a care for their feelings:
September 7, 2025 at 8:10 AM
GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A BIG SHOT
September 5, 2025 at 5:37 AM
been watching Adventure Time with my sister lately for the first time in years
September 5, 2025 at 3:23 AM
like y'all see it right
September 3, 2025 at 12:07 AM
NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A [[FRY COOK]]
September 2, 2025 at 11:23 PM
as it should
September 2, 2025 at 3:36 PM
this is just the WW Great Fairies, mighty sentinels of gender
September 1, 2025 at 5:47 AM
assuming that you have posted this because you are eating a sandwich that looks exactly like this (screenshot because idk if it looks different from your end)
August 27, 2025 at 10:24 PM
ohhhh his expression here is so good
August 26, 2025 at 4:38 AM
heavy lobster
August 26, 2025 at 4:18 AM
YOU can PLAY as CAPPY??????????????????!!?!??????? Mr Sakurai you have blessed us yet again

also, This ↓ will have dramatic effects on the Trout Population
August 19, 2025 at 7:02 PM
me when someone asks if the Eel can come out to play
August 18, 2025 at 8:30 PM
me when I'm watching the Sonic '06 Snapcube fan dub and Sonic says his classic line
August 18, 2025 at 8:29 PM