SoullessSolace
@soullesssolace.bsky.social
Ash
He/him
🇳🇿Kiwi🇳🇿
22
🌪️ I'll probably a lot about whatever is causing the most problems at the time🌪️
He/him
🇳🇿Kiwi🇳🇿
22
🌪️ I'll probably a lot about whatever is causing the most problems at the time🌪️
I hate making decisions. If I can't delegate the decision making, it's gonna be random selection. I will eeny meeny miney mo my way out of this.
December 7, 2025 at 5:30 AM
I hate making decisions. If I can't delegate the decision making, it's gonna be random selection. I will eeny meeny miney mo my way out of this.
F and I cooked roast beef for dinner tonight and it turned out beautifully. Every single meal I've cooked has turned out really well! Maybe I should get back into cooking when I get home
December 7, 2025 at 4:54 AM
F and I cooked roast beef for dinner tonight and it turned out beautifully. Every single meal I've cooked has turned out really well! Maybe I should get back into cooking when I get home
I had a phone consult with a doctor yesterday to talk about pain management and she increased my Diclofenac to 75mg twice a day. I haven't been in pain today so it seems like they're working!
December 6, 2025 at 5:49 AM
I had a phone consult with a doctor yesterday to talk about pain management and she increased my Diclofenac to 75mg twice a day. I haven't been in pain today so it seems like they're working!
I was in charge of dinner tonight and the salmon quiche turned out amazing. All the things I've cooked here have actually turned out really well. And it's getting easier each time.
December 6, 2025 at 5:48 AM
I was in charge of dinner tonight and the salmon quiche turned out amazing. All the things I've cooked here have actually turned out really well. And it's getting easier each time.
My grandma, sister, and partner came up to see me today. It was really good to see them. And I got a couple early Christmas gifts lol. Then we caught up with Grandma's SIL who I haven't seen since I was a child, but that was good.
December 5, 2025 at 3:57 AM
My grandma, sister, and partner came up to see me today. It was really good to see them. And I got a couple early Christmas gifts lol. Then we caught up with Grandma's SIL who I haven't seen since I was a child, but that was good.
I went in for what should have been a 5 minute appointment with a nurse for my injection. I was there for over 1.5 hours. They fucked around for over an hour over a miscommunication on their end and tried to say I needed to see the doctor. And then they made me wait around for 20 minutes after...
December 4, 2025 at 2:41 AM
I went in for what should have been a 5 minute appointment with a nurse for my injection. I was there for over 1.5 hours. They fucked around for over an hour over a miscommunication on their end and tried to say I needed to see the doctor. And then they made me wait around for 20 minutes after...
I had a really rough morning. I had a really bad nightmare last night and I've been in a lot of pain for the past week and everything just boiled over. I went to programme and did the first hour. Then I talked to one of the caseworkers and came back to the house for a bit before going back.
December 3, 2025 at 3:17 AM
I had a really rough morning. I had a really bad nightmare last night and I've been in a lot of pain for the past week and everything just boiled over. I went to programme and did the first hour. Then I talked to one of the caseworkers and came back to the house for a bit before going back.
I'm hungry but also nauseous
November 30, 2025 at 12:22 AM
I'm hungry but also nauseous
My superpower is being so quiet when I enter or leave a room that other people think I just vanish and appear. It's hilarious.
November 29, 2025 at 11:03 PM
My superpower is being so quiet when I enter or leave a room that other people think I just vanish and appear. It's hilarious.
I feel like I've been productive today. I did a load of laundry, went for a 4km walk, bought more yarn, and cooked dinner for 7 people which turned out really well.
November 29, 2025 at 6:24 AM
I feel like I've been productive today. I did a load of laundry, went for a 4km walk, bought more yarn, and cooked dinner for 7 people which turned out really well.
Holy shit, I just realized this is the longest I've been sober since November 2024. I'm 25 days sober. I was so focused on the 106 days from 2023 that I lost sight that this is still a massive achievement.
November 28, 2025 at 6:16 AM
Holy shit, I just realized this is the longest I've been sober since November 2024. I'm 25 days sober. I was so focused on the 106 days from 2023 that I lost sight that this is still a massive achievement.
Therapy is basically cable management for our fucked up brains
November 28, 2025 at 4:40 AM
Therapy is basically cable management for our fucked up brains
I've had a rough couple weeks, but finding this song has given me some perspective.
November 28, 2025 at 4:24 AM
I've had a rough couple weeks, but finding this song has given me some perspective.
I've found a new recovery anthem. It Doesn't Get Better by Citizen Soldier
November 28, 2025 at 4:23 AM
I've found a new recovery anthem. It Doesn't Get Better by Citizen Soldier
I'm in quite a bit of pain today and the painkillers aren't helping. So I'm pretty grumpy. I want to get high or drunk to help the pain but I'm at rehab
November 26, 2025 at 2:48 AM
I'm in quite a bit of pain today and the painkillers aren't helping. So I'm pretty grumpy. I want to get high or drunk to help the pain but I'm at rehab
I went to an NA meeting tonight and one of the women there gave me a flower at the end. I don't know what to do with it, but it did brighten my night a little
November 25, 2025 at 7:19 AM
I went to an NA meeting tonight and one of the women there gave me a flower at the end. I don't know what to do with it, but it did brighten my night a little
I want to go home. They can't force me to stay at rehab and I could catch the bus first thing tomorrow morning.
But I also know that if I leave, I'll relapse and I won't come back.
But I also know that if I leave, I'll relapse and I won't come back.
November 24, 2025 at 5:33 AM
I want to go home. They can't force me to stay at rehab and I could catch the bus first thing tomorrow morning.
But I also know that if I leave, I'll relapse and I won't come back.
But I also know that if I leave, I'll relapse and I won't come back.
I got very sunburnt yesterday
November 24, 2025 at 2:45 AM
I got very sunburnt yesterday
There are 4 NA meetings and 13 AA meetings every week between my hometown and the city I work in. So I really have no excuse to not attend at least a couple of them when I get out of here.
November 24, 2025 at 12:50 AM
There are 4 NA meetings and 13 AA meetings every week between my hometown and the city I work in. So I really have no excuse to not attend at least a couple of them when I get out of here.
People keep saying I need to eat more. I pretty much just eat dinner at the moment and snack on lollies. I have lost about 3kg in 2 weeks but I'm overweight anyway so it's fine.
November 22, 2025 at 9:46 PM
People keep saying I need to eat more. I pretty much just eat dinner at the moment and snack on lollies. I have lost about 3kg in 2 weeks but I'm overweight anyway so it's fine.
There's one guy here who I really admire. He has a lot of things to work on and he gets on people's nerves a lot. But he's a really good guy and you can just tell how much he cares about his friends and family. His kids mean the world to him and he's doing everything he can to better himself.
November 22, 2025 at 5:11 AM
There's one guy here who I really admire. He has a lot of things to work on and he gets on people's nerves a lot. But he's a really good guy and you can just tell how much he cares about his friends and family. His kids mean the world to him and he's doing everything he can to better himself.
I had a bit of a pep talk this afternoon about how it's okay to cry. It was actually really helpful. Especially when it comes from another man. Toxic masculinity is really hard to break out of, but it's amazing to see that it's possible to break out of that mindset that's so deeply ingrained in you.
November 22, 2025 at 5:01 AM
I had a bit of a pep talk this afternoon about how it's okay to cry. It was actually really helpful. Especially when it comes from another man. Toxic masculinity is really hard to break out of, but it's amazing to see that it's possible to break out of that mindset that's so deeply ingrained in you.
I got to see my mum, grandma and boyfriend today. They came to visit and I got lots of cuddles from my boyfriend and hugs from mum and grandma. I'm probably gonna start feeling sad soon because they had to leave, but I'm really happy I got to see them
November 22, 2025 at 2:57 AM
I got to see my mum, grandma and boyfriend today. They came to visit and I got lots of cuddles from my boyfriend and hugs from mum and grandma. I'm probably gonna start feeling sad soon because they had to leave, but I'm really happy I got to see them
I had a chat with one of the caseworkers over the phone just before. I've had a bit of a rough week and she was really understanding. She knows what it's like and she doesn't sugar coat things. I like her. And she had some good suggestions.
November 21, 2025 at 5:41 AM
I had a chat with one of the caseworkers over the phone just before. I've had a bit of a rough week and she was really understanding. She knows what it's like and she doesn't sugar coat things. I like her. And she had some good suggestions.
I'm so restless and frustrated. I want to drink more than I've wanted to drink since I've been here. But that's not an option
November 19, 2025 at 6:55 AM
I'm so restless and frustrated. I want to drink more than I've wanted to drink since I've been here. But that's not an option