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solelyfictional.bsky.social
MsSolo 🫖 🏳️‍🌈
@solelyfictional.bsky.social
250 followers 1.3K following 1.5K posts
I am currently bisexually eating brie. Former writer, current exhausted parent. She/her, UK
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solelyfictional.bsky.social
The title card for the BBC's The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe. Behind the text is an image of a steam train.
November 2, 2025 at 5:09 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Why yes, I am rocking the £3 sainsburys witch hat, as are several other mums here.
A selfie in front of a sandstone pillar of a white woman in glasses with a witches hat rendered transparent by the light coming through the windows behind the pillar
November 2, 2025 at 3:28 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
I once drunkenly tried to explain to a friend that jellies and jellyfish were different things, and she gave me such a scathing look, and it was only after i sobered up i realised she thought i was talking about jelly-and-ice-cream jellies.
Are those the tears of a little mermaid I see caught in the waves lapping at my feet? They glitter in the water like diaphanous pearls, splitting the light into all its colours. I pick one up but it loses its shine. It becomes little more than a globule of jelly, only regaining its shimmer when returned to the water. Perhaps it's one of those seemingly alien comb jellies, after all, which resemble jellyfish but constitute their own taxonomic group, the Ctenophora. From Chapter 10 of Slime, by Susannne Wedlich
October 24, 2025 at 6:35 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
The official display has finished. Now we're on to the part of the evening where the dads insist on setting off one firework at a time in their own gardens for hours on end while the family stands around in the cold.
A large firework burst above a terraced house, seen through the bars of a metal gate
October 20, 2025 at 7:29 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Retvrn to rave cultvre
Despite their nifty burrows they were found by the Romans, and Pliny writes of night-time Pholas feasts during which guests' mouths, hands and clothing would glow in the dark because they had been sprayed with the molluscs' bioluminescent slime...
October 11, 2025 at 6:03 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
(I spent ages hoping someone else had alt texted it, but didn't find one and I really need people to see these posters)
Four James Bond posters with the actor on top of a 007 background and the name of a film in the centre of each. Top left, Sean Connery, Dr No, khaki background, arms folded and giving the viewer the side eye with his hand in the classic Wanker shape. Top right, Roger Moore, turquoisebackhround, A View to a Kill, with a badly photoshopped suit jacket missing one lapel and weirdly extended sleeves. Bottom left, Pierce Bosnan, Goldeneye, gold background, in a shirt and waistcoat absolutely accusing you of being a walker. Bottom right, Daniel Craig, Spectre, dark teal background, no gun but still wearing a holster. They have, of course, left the guns in the logos beneath the film names.
October 4, 2025 at 11:33 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Post a random picture or else everything will go bad in September
A photo of a blue sticker on a pink board. The sticker reads "you got 2 minutes?" Someone has written "No." in black marker pen beneath.
September 2, 2025 at 9:15 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
I mean, he's been dead for 16 years, so probably, but also no?
A banner ad for The Business Lead, with a picture of Patrick Swayze on the left, a wire arrow on a red background on the right, and the headline "Patrick Swayze Is So Skinny Now And Looks Like A Model" in between
August 23, 2025 at 1:25 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
A tweet from 2017 from @johnneh The vengabus is coming And everybody's jumping The vengabus' purpose A rail replacement service To take you to some stations We thank you for your patience Might want to set out early It will delay your journey
August 21, 2025 at 10:43 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Small Child has drawn me a colouring book
An adult hand is holding a small brown pencil, colouring in the hair of a royal in a triangular dress. There is a four-legged creature at the bottom of the page
July 22, 2025 at 8:06 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
When different parts of my "stuff I should probably engage with less at work" media consumption collide and now I'm wondering what bastard Alison would guest for (bearing in mind btb has already done a lot of "reasons the US has shitty labour laws" bastards already)
A screenshot of two skeets Ask a Manager: for the love of fuck No, I'm not going to rewrite my answer to cater to your unhappiness about "they" pronouns (Only men and emails like this, by the way...) Screenshot of linked in message asking get to do just that Robert Evans: oh my god
July 22, 2025 at 7:56 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Also I'm still obsessed with The Box by Marc Levinson
A vinyl sticker of a container ship against a blue-grey wall, sailing on top of a strip of black and silver mosaic tiles above large off-white tiles
July 21, 2025 at 6:06 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Let Small Child loose decorating the bathroom with vinyl stickers
A bathroom wall, divided with black mosaic tiles with large off white tiles below and a pale blue-grey wave wallpaper above (Great Wave inspired), with a dark blue sink unit on the left. Stuck on to the wave are several brightly coloured vinyl stickers of fishing boats, while on the tiles there are half a dozen blue and red fish and a star fish
July 21, 2025 at 5:57 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Behold the maxi babybel (mini babybel for scale)
A selection of cheese, including a mini babybel and a maxi babybel, which is roughly six times the size.
July 16, 2025 at 6:36 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Train colouring.
Two colouring pages. On the left is a chimp in a spacesuit being menaced by a tentacle alien. The chimp is red, in a pink spacesuit with red gloves and boots. The alien has green tentacles and a red head and eyes. The colouring is scribbly (average for a 5 year old). On the right is a maze with an astronaut in a small spaceship on the top left as the start and a space station at the bottom right as the goal. It had been coloured in by an adult (me) and is mostly grey and black.
July 12, 2025 at 10:02 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Duke Welly looking fine in his summer fits

(as the youth might say?)
A statue of the Duke of Wellington in green copper, hand on cocked hip, knee bent. He has an orange traffic cone at a jaunty angle on his head and his boots have been freshly painted red, according to local tradition (in which students colour in the statue's boots every time someone cleans off last season's paint)
June 27, 2025 at 6:34 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Do you think anyone ever actually shaves in the tiny train toilet?
A photo of a wall socket installed at chest height above the sink in a train toilet, that reads "shavers only" 115v 230v and has a little icon of someone shaving their beard
June 22, 2025 at 10:34 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Listening to the entirety of Magnus Pritocols s1 in 3 days left me distinctly vulnerable to Small Child's abrupt obsession with Playtime Towers, which features this Monzo looking mfer. Good to know kids tv can still muster a Mr Blobby esque nightmare.
Hettie the Yeti at the ice disco. Someone in a full body shaggy orange suit with a purple stomach and hair. Instead of eyes it has sunglasses and a knitted red smile. In this image it is holding a towel in purple, red and pink.
June 16, 2025 at 5:30 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
My shiny new friends
A shiny bronze-red and green striped beetle on the edge of a metal bucket full of sprouting tomato plants
May 31, 2025 at 2:03 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
What I mainly learned from this is I have no sense of the centre of this country. Like, I've probably changed trains or stopped at motorway services in most of those counties, but no real sense which.
A picture of the UK, with counties I've lived in highlighted in red, stayed in orange, visited in yellow, stopped in green, passed through on blue and never been in white. Northern Wales, Northern Ireland and most of Scotland (apart from Edinburgh, Glasgow, and argyll and bute) are white. There are stripes of blue up the centre of England.
May 31, 2025 at 10:17 AM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Small Child has demanded an audience regardless.
A black towel rail designed a bit like a ladder, with a white towel hanging on one side, some pink and turquoise flannels, two cuddly rabbits, one white (Cles) and one grey (Cheese), perched on the top rung, a near-circular cuddly black bat (Betty) the next rung down, and a cuddly labrador (Duggie) squeezed between the next two
May 30, 2025 at 5:34 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
(I am bad at editing meme formats)
Lucille Ball banana meme, reading "I mean it's one AUTHOR Micheal, what could it cost? Ten NEWSPAPERS
May 18, 2025 at 5:33 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
In Sherwood Forest talking about Richard Lionheart and the crusades with @jackgann.bsky.social
Two pictures stacked vertically. In the top, a guy from a us sitcom (the office?) in a crowded room with a photoshopped saxon helmet looks at the camera, and the text "the anglo-saxon mercenary who's come to constantinople to participate in the first crusade". In the bottom, a guy with a viking hemlet (no horns) looks at the camera,implying meeting the other guys eyes, and the text "the norwegian noble he fought at Stamford Bridge"
May 3, 2025 at 12:37 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
Emma Pearn, a Knight in silver armour, a helmet which covers her face, on a brown horse with a grey and black caparison, returning to the stable end of the tilt yard tray for the next bout.
April 21, 2025 at 2:10 PM
solelyfictional.bsky.social
April 21, 2025 at 2:02 PM