slosifl
@slosifl.bsky.social
Babysitter. Risk taker. Approachable.
Upgrading my skeleton closet so I can regret more this year!
January 2, 2026 at 3:30 AM
Upgrading my skeleton closet so I can regret more this year!
This year, for real this time, I will fundamentally literally become a different person. A better and extremely unfamiliar guy.
January 2, 2026 at 2:27 AM
This year, for real this time, I will fundamentally literally become a different person. A better and extremely unfamiliar guy.
History Professor (gravely): and then guess what happened after that
December 31, 2025 at 5:09 AM
History Professor (gravely): and then guess what happened after that
after 41 years of marriage my wife finally picked which live divided sky solo she won’t let me play on loop in the car. luckily my backup is secretly way better.
December 31, 2025 at 4:52 AM
after 41 years of marriage my wife finally picked which live divided sky solo she won’t let me play on loop in the car. luckily my backup is secretly way better.
amnesiac tries hospital food for the first time
December 30, 2025 at 4:57 AM
amnesiac tries hospital food for the first time
here we are
once again
recollecting the auld
only 2 forget them
not even a mouse
once again
recollecting the auld
only 2 forget them
not even a mouse
December 29, 2025 at 4:00 AM
here we are
once again
recollecting the auld
only 2 forget them
not even a mouse
once again
recollecting the auld
only 2 forget them
not even a mouse
magic lamp ai out of nowhere while watching tv:
consider it done master, you have 1 wishes left
consider it done master, you have 1 wishes left
December 22, 2025 at 3:45 AM
magic lamp ai out of nowhere while watching tv:
consider it done master, you have 1 wishes left
consider it done master, you have 1 wishes left
God: oh fuck
God’s Sister in Law (holding up earth wrapped in eight hundred layers of newspaper): she fucking loves you paul
God’s Sister in Law (holding up earth wrapped in eight hundred layers of newspaper): she fucking loves you paul
December 21, 2025 at 3:29 AM
God: oh fuck
God’s Sister in Law (holding up earth wrapped in eight hundred layers of newspaper): she fucking loves you paul
God’s Sister in Law (holding up earth wrapped in eight hundred layers of newspaper): she fucking loves you paul
Well I’m going to need a second opinion
Doctor: if you insist. your wife is ugly.
Doctor: if you insist. your wife is ugly.
December 21, 2025 at 3:09 AM
Well I’m going to need a second opinion
Doctor: if you insist. your wife is ugly.
Doctor: if you insist. your wife is ugly.
in tex-italian
heeeey the alomos doooont “fugeduboutit”
heeeey the alomos doooont “fugeduboutit”
December 18, 2025 at 2:33 AM
in tex-italian
heeeey the alomos doooont “fugeduboutit”
heeeey the alomos doooont “fugeduboutit”
dream journal
noise canceling raisins, again
noise canceling raisins, again
December 17, 2025 at 4:52 AM
dream journal
noise canceling raisins, again
noise canceling raisins, again
I have 1% left (Final Boss) and downloaded Higwart: The Legacy for free. My character is Sandra Pampers, a hufflepuffian witch who can ride a broom and is at 99% in Silksong.
December 17, 2025 at 3:37 AM
I have 1% left (Final Boss) and downloaded Higwart: The Legacy for free. My character is Sandra Pampers, a hufflepuffian witch who can ride a broom and is at 99% in Silksong.
VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED
me: wait pause it babe
me: wait pause it babe
December 17, 2025 at 2:07 AM
VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED
me: wait pause it babe
me: wait pause it babe
My son is AI and I love him so much but he’s driving me crazy! Might upgrade.
December 17, 2025 at 2:03 AM
My son is AI and I love him so much but he’s driving me crazy! Might upgrade.
for christmas i’m taking my great grandson to meet jon benet ramsay in “roblox”, whatever that means. i just hope he likes it. she got murdered when i was in high school.
December 15, 2025 at 12:49 AM
for christmas i’m taking my great grandson to meet jon benet ramsay in “roblox”, whatever that means. i just hope he likes it. she got murdered when i was in high school.
i licked a spooky clump of road salt
doctor (skeptically): fuck this looks like a ghost bit you
doctor (skeptically): fuck this looks like a ghost bit you
December 10, 2025 at 2:24 AM
i licked a spooky clump of road salt
doctor (skeptically): fuck this looks like a ghost bit you
doctor (skeptically): fuck this looks like a ghost bit you
Anyone else get a email from “God’s Mom” saying we have until new year to find another place to live
December 7, 2025 at 5:19 AM
Anyone else get a email from “God’s Mom” saying we have until new year to find another place to live
Sitting at the triple point on the naughty/nice phase chart. Be naughty enough and nice the right amount at 245psi, heat it up to 1600K, and it becomes a straight up vapor. You get coal and presents.
December 7, 2025 at 4:59 AM
Sitting at the triple point on the naughty/nice phase chart. Be naughty enough and nice the right amount at 245psi, heat it up to 1600K, and it becomes a straight up vapor. You get coal and presents.
I hope that aliens make a youtube video about us someday, little monkeys on a wet cube in space
December 6, 2025 at 5:04 AM
I hope that aliens make a youtube video about us someday, little monkeys on a wet cube in space
i’ve been leaving food out for a neighborhood cat and after talking to him tonight i found out he’s a regular guy wearing 125 cat skins
December 2, 2025 at 3:43 AM
i’ve been leaving food out for a neighborhood cat and after talking to him tonight i found out he’s a regular guy wearing 125 cat skins
Time to break down the turkey carcass and rebuild it as a nativity scene. Jesus is made of pelvis 🙏
November 29, 2025 at 5:12 AM
Time to break down the turkey carcass and rebuild it as a nativity scene. Jesus is made of pelvis 🙏
Wild that I have memories of my parents being old when they were younger than me is now. They spoke so great.
November 26, 2025 at 5:43 AM
Wild that I have memories of my parents being old when they were younger than me is now. They spoke so great.
BRITISH BOY REACTS TO 145,000 SEA TURTLES HATCHING AND TRYING TO GET TO THE SEA
if i got sand in me oys id kill meself
if i got sand in me oys id kill meself
November 26, 2025 at 5:36 AM
BRITISH BOY REACTS TO 145,000 SEA TURTLES HATCHING AND TRYING TO GET TO THE SEA
if i got sand in me oys id kill meself
if i got sand in me oys id kill meself
i went to an off-site work lunch and it got crazy today. my coworker said “i have a super old car” to preface a sentence and someone else i work with asked “oh what type of old car”. It was a 2015 Honda “or something”. I have a brand new car i bought in 2015
November 26, 2025 at 5:12 AM
i went to an off-site work lunch and it got crazy today. my coworker said “i have a super old car” to preface a sentence and someone else i work with asked “oh what type of old car”. It was a 2015 Honda “or something”. I have a brand new car i bought in 2015
Remember when Lunchables had a cigarette in them?
November 24, 2025 at 12:23 AM
Remember when Lunchables had a cigarette in them?