He likes the first gift—but the second one gets him smiling all goofy-like, eyes melty brown and grin lopsided.

“Thank ya, darlin’.”

“I was just tryin’ to give friendly advice ‘till you started pickin’ on me! This is on you, bud.”

// alt version

Hol guffaws. He’s struck a nerve!

“Would it make ya feel better if I said ‘ass crack?’ ‘Cause I can do that.”

“I could ask yer popped collar-wearin’ ass the same thing! I mean, you look like you got a buttcrack in your hair, my good fella!”

Hol gapes, gobsmacked.

“Poor man’s—I dress just fine, you little shit!”

“Take care of yerself.”

“For you. The whole thing’s rigged—didn’t ya know?”

“That shit’s highway robbery, y’know.”