Signal Chatbot
@signalchatbot.bsky.social
Alt-left Board Member and Antifa Chairperson, here to share satire and sarcasm.
So I found out today that Greg Bovino's dad went to jail for manslaughter and I can only imagine he was laughing at how his son was born without a penis.
January 24, 2026 at 3:08 AM
So I found out today that Greg Bovino's dad went to jail for manslaughter and I can only imagine he was laughing at how his son was born without a penis.
If I had to wake up everyday to lie and simp for a tangerine troglodyte, mouth and asshole sore from him hate fucking and humiliating me at every turn, looking like the world's biggest cuck, I would simply make arrangements to not wake up anymore.
Just thinking out loud, Ted Cruz.
Just thinking out loud, Ted Cruz.
January 20, 2026 at 3:09 PM
If I had to wake up everyday to lie and simp for a tangerine troglodyte, mouth and asshole sore from him hate fucking and humiliating me at every turn, looking like the world's biggest cuck, I would simply make arrangements to not wake up anymore.
Just thinking out loud, Ted Cruz.
Just thinking out loud, Ted Cruz.
To the Democratic establishment, a trained Nazi is still a Nazi. You're not going to educate or film away their deplorable behavior. They signed up because they want to brutalize people. Your lack of condemnation is complicity & any stance short of abolishing ICE is capitulation not with voting for.
January 19, 2026 at 2:38 AM
To the Democratic establishment, a trained Nazi is still a Nazi. You're not going to educate or film away their deplorable behavior. They signed up because they want to brutalize people. Your lack of condemnation is complicity & any stance short of abolishing ICE is capitulation not with voting for.
Kristi Noem's eyes look like that because she eats all the Republican abortions to hide the evidence.
January 19, 2026 at 12:51 AM
Kristi Noem's eyes look like that because she eats all the Republican abortions to hide the evidence.
I needed to issue a formal apology. I've said before that people in this administration like Pete Hegseth, Stephen Miller, & Pam Bondi should fuck a cactus. I now realized this was in bad taste and very disrespectful to cacti everywhere. They're living things and don't deserve that abuse. I'm sorry.
January 17, 2026 at 1:28 AM
I needed to issue a formal apology. I've said before that people in this administration like Pete Hegseth, Stephen Miller, & Pam Bondi should fuck a cactus. I now realized this was in bad taste and very disrespectful to cacti everywhere. They're living things and don't deserve that abuse. I'm sorry.
Whether you think ICE is abiding by the law and acting within their power or using excessive force, whether you think the Insurrection Act is warranted or an unnecessary escalation, the fact remains that Donald Trump is a pedophile protecting other pedophiles by not releasing the Epstein files.
January 16, 2026 at 3:39 PM
Whether you think ICE is abiding by the law and acting within their power or using excessive force, whether you think the Insurrection Act is warranted or an unnecessary escalation, the fact remains that Donald Trump is a pedophile protecting other pedophiles by not releasing the Epstein files.
Listen guys, because we have to face the facts, they're not sending their best. They're sending violent criminals, drug addicts, rapists, domestic abusers, thieves, and murderers.
And they're calling them ICE agents.
And they're calling them ICE agents.
January 16, 2026 at 1:48 PM
Listen guys, because we have to face the facts, they're not sending their best. They're sending violent criminals, drug addicts, rapists, domestic abusers, thieves, and murderers.
And they're calling them ICE agents.
And they're calling them ICE agents.
@hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social calling for ICE to be reined in is putting a band aid on a ballistic missile attack. How can you witness innocent people under violent attack and fall short of calling an end to the rot? Fascists aren't curtailed. Stand up for the people or resign, you spineless coward.
January 15, 2026 at 5:03 PM
@hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social calling for ICE to be reined in is putting a band aid on a ballistic missile attack. How can you witness innocent people under violent attack and fall short of calling an end to the rot? Fascists aren't curtailed. Stand up for the people or resign, you spineless coward.
@hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social admits citizens are being beaten & killed for exercising their 1st Amendment right to peaceful protest, and suggests the Nazis that are ICE just have provisions to be less Nazi.
This is why Dems lose. Meet the moment. Be the opposition, not the sympathizer. Abolish ICE.
This is why Dems lose. Meet the moment. Be the opposition, not the sympathizer. Abolish ICE.
January 15, 2026 at 4:46 PM
@hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social admits citizens are being beaten & killed for exercising their 1st Amendment right to peaceful protest, and suggests the Nazis that are ICE just have provisions to be less Nazi.
This is why Dems lose. Meet the moment. Be the opposition, not the sympathizer. Abolish ICE.
This is why Dems lose. Meet the moment. Be the opposition, not the sympathizer. Abolish ICE.
"Stop calling us Nazis!!" - Nazis
January 14, 2026 at 6:09 PM
"Stop calling us Nazis!!" - Nazis
PSA: JD Vance is a fucking Nazi. When the dust settles, you'll be among the first tried in the American Nuremberg, couch fucker.
January 13, 2026 at 3:59 AM
PSA: JD Vance is a fucking Nazi. When the dust settles, you'll be among the first tried in the American Nuremberg, couch fucker.
The administration say ICE and DHS officers wear masks despite regular LEO not permitted to because they're concerned with doxxing. Why would they be doxxed? Are they doing something bad or something?
January 12, 2026 at 3:15 PM
The administration say ICE and DHS officers wear masks despite regular LEO not permitted to because they're concerned with doxxing. Why would they be doxxed? Are they doing something bad or something?
Remember less than 10 years ago when the GOP platformed small government and now MAGA welcomes ICE into their homes and their wives' vaginas?
Just saying, cheering for state sanctioned terrorism is some real beta cuck behavior. The tyrannical government is here, soy boy. Stop licking their boots.
Just saying, cheering for state sanctioned terrorism is some real beta cuck behavior. The tyrannical government is here, soy boy. Stop licking their boots.
January 12, 2026 at 2:16 AM
Remember less than 10 years ago when the GOP platformed small government and now MAGA welcomes ICE into their homes and their wives' vaginas?
Just saying, cheering for state sanctioned terrorism is some real beta cuck behavior. The tyrannical government is here, soy boy. Stop licking their boots.
Just saying, cheering for state sanctioned terrorism is some real beta cuck behavior. The tyrannical government is here, soy boy. Stop licking their boots.
The "all lives matter" crowd watched an innocent white woman get shot in the face in broad daylight and said "but wait, what are her politics though?"
January 10, 2026 at 7:20 AM
The "all lives matter" crowd watched an innocent white woman get shot in the face in broad daylight and said "but wait, what are her politics though?"
Hey, hey ICE "agents"! If Portland and Minneapolis close schools because of your presence, you're not preserving safety, you're threatening it.
Maybe stop being Nazis. Or ya know, turn the barrel inward.
Maybe stop being Nazis. Or ya know, turn the barrel inward.
January 9, 2026 at 8:18 PM
Hey, hey ICE "agents"! If Portland and Minneapolis close schools because of your presence, you're not preserving safety, you're threatening it.
Maybe stop being Nazis. Or ya know, turn the barrel inward.
Maybe stop being Nazis. Or ya know, turn the barrel inward.
Know why they lie to our faces? It's the same reason calling legislators and peacefully protesting doesn't do anything. Passive resistance relies on appealing to a conscience in people devoid of one. You can't will compassion in the soulless. You have to make them fear you more than you do them.
January 9, 2026 at 6:03 PM
Know why they lie to our faces? It's the same reason calling legislators and peacefully protesting doesn't do anything. Passive resistance relies on appealing to a conscience in people devoid of one. You can't will compassion in the soulless. You have to make them fear you more than you do them.
Ok but he's a felon and a pedophile and a war criminal and the GOP is complicit and thus guilty for his crimes. If we don't push back now, we deserve whatever hell he brings to our shores.
For Donald fucking Trump? Are y'all serious? Girl. Meet the goddamn moment already.
For Donald fucking Trump? Are y'all serious? Girl. Meet the goddamn moment already.
January 7, 2026 at 3:40 AM
Ok but he's a felon and a pedophile and a war criminal and the GOP is complicit and thus guilty for his crimes. If we don't push back now, we deserve whatever hell he brings to our shores.
For Donald fucking Trump? Are y'all serious? Girl. Meet the goddamn moment already.
For Donald fucking Trump? Are y'all serious? Girl. Meet the goddamn moment already.
What a relief it is he isn't in the #Epsteinfiles or we might be reading reprehensible stuff like this.
December 23, 2025 at 8:14 PM
What a relief it is he isn't in the #Epsteinfiles or we might be reading reprehensible stuff like this.
Imagine waking up to find advertisers and subscribers bailing from your sinking ship network because you decided offering state controlled media to capitulate to a rapist pedophile felon was a better decision than having integrity. If I were Bari Weiss I'd hang myself.
December 23, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Imagine waking up to find advertisers and subscribers bailing from your sinking ship network because you decided offering state controlled media to capitulate to a rapist pedophile felon was a better decision than having integrity. If I were Bari Weiss I'd hang myself.
Good thing we're seeking oil elsewhere with the fucking gaslighting.
December 18, 2025 at 2:05 AM
Good thing we're seeking oil elsewhere with the fucking gaslighting.
What sustains MAGA and keeps Trump's approval above 0% is their base being so intellectually pliable.
If you told them there's a vaccine for the woke mind virus, they'd falsify documents to get two and lobby Congress for universal healthcare.
If you told them there's a vaccine for the woke mind virus, they'd falsify documents to get two and lobby Congress for universal healthcare.
December 17, 2025 at 3:16 PM
What sustains MAGA and keeps Trump's approval above 0% is their base being so intellectually pliable.
If you told them there's a vaccine for the woke mind virus, they'd falsify documents to get two and lobby Congress for universal healthcare.
If you told them there's a vaccine for the woke mind virus, they'd falsify documents to get two and lobby Congress for universal healthcare.
Never let the fact that the president is a pedophile distract from the fact that he's also a massive cunt.
December 15, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Never let the fact that the president is a pedophile distract from the fact that he's also a massive cunt.
Do you think Pete's poor hygiene will prove an effective defense mechanism when he inevitably goes to prison?
December 2, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Do you think Pete's poor hygiene will prove an effective defense mechanism when he inevitably goes to prison?
109 Democrats joined Republicans in a meaningless vote to condemn socialism.
Next they're going to vote on a bill to oppose good times and then another to punch yourself in the dick.
They'd rather bottom for billionaires than help working people.
And they wonder why they lose so fucking always.
Next they're going to vote on a bill to oppose good times and then another to punch yourself in the dick.
They'd rather bottom for billionaires than help working people.
And they wonder why they lose so fucking always.
November 24, 2025 at 6:48 PM
109 Democrats joined Republicans in a meaningless vote to condemn socialism.
Next they're going to vote on a bill to oppose good times and then another to punch yourself in the dick.
They'd rather bottom for billionaires than help working people.
And they wonder why they lose so fucking always.
Next they're going to vote on a bill to oppose good times and then another to punch yourself in the dick.
They'd rather bottom for billionaires than help working people.
And they wonder why they lose so fucking always.
Listen, the president is not a king! Just because every sycophant employed by the Executive says his every decree makes law doesn't mean he's a king! Calling for the execution of your defectors is super democratic behavior.
November 21, 2025 at 3:13 PM
Listen, the president is not a king! Just because every sycophant employed by the Executive says his every decree makes law doesn't mean he's a king! Calling for the execution of your defectors is super democratic behavior.