It’s official, if you fuck me, you cum 93% of the time. I’ve got stats to back it up 📊

I was such a slut in 2025. Over a pint of cum got squirted into my holes.

More please!

I truly don’t care if you use drugs. Do what you like.

But “chems” make you a crap shag. I will not fuck you on chems. Not because I have some moral objection but because I want. to. get. FUCKED!

Lying there while you try to press the tip of your dick in with your thumb?

Bai!

When he *says* he’s versatile, but you’re getting a different vibe.

Making a list. Checking it twice.

So bored of this.

I don’t know why, but guys using the word “tactile” in their hookup profiles gives me the ick.

When a guy says “where do you want me to cum?” and you say “All over my face,” there is a non-zero chance that guy is about to go off like he’s been edging since 2017.

True story.

I regret nothing.