i want to model too. but i want to model a certain style, and i feel like it's a style i'll get nowhere with unless i learn how to draw it first. and i'm really overwhelmed by how much needs to be done when the best thing to do is to just start

at this point i don't know how much of it is disability and how much of it is, no we're just shit

as the resident xiv roses player now i only have energy to do patch MSQ. which have been very good this time around. tho come 7.5 im gonna struggle to meet min duty ilvl w/o grinding sessions/days

xiv was tiring because of the strictly regimented to do list, which we appreciate dgmw, but it was exhausting bc you had like a dozen ppl making sure you did absolutely everything in order. at some point post ShB we just went rogue and made our own to do list as best as we could.

did you know there are ppl who played torna before xc2 and had a totally different experience with the series? i think that's cool tbh. i also played 2/Torna and base 3 before 1. and i've still never played FC but i know generally what's up.

like at least i started on the beginning of arcs and not sky sc, or cs3, or horizon, or reverie!
in ten years from now when me and the friends who decided to invest in the series are all caught up, then we can finally talk cross series talk.

our theme word for next year will be focused more on being a part of the world and contributing again, rather than just simply being in it. to "reconnect". be that in the home w family, locally, in our new country, our online spaces, with ourselves&

we've had the lowest spoons ever, struggled a lot mentally. so just being able to survive through the year was enough for us to consider success. even tho things right now are a huge fucking mess in many ways.

and to no longer living alone. and so "co-existence" evolved to include living with others in the same home again. and to us, it still meant the bare minimum of surviving in this manner. even if methods seemed unconventional,

for us & it's like a home base to come back to.

the word we landed on this year was "co-exist". we wanted to live more plurally, finding peace in doing so. especially as we were embarking on our biggest move in life since 12 years ago, moving the roses to another country,

even if u forget and then halfway through the year you come back to this word, and interpret in a totally different way, or it brings more clarity... again it's your word, your rules.

arguably, the new year is also just an arbitrary time boundary but we can't discount the collective momentum of people's shifts in energy who choose to use it as a kick off point. choosing a time to execute is already arbitrary, and it's not like we are doing "nothing" leading up to it anyway

honestly, there are better ways we& could be spending time w certain family members but i am electing to do that on a more regularly scheduled basis in the new year than trying to patch things ad hoc in the name of a tight window of "festive time".