this is so jiang yanli. ever the peacekeeper, the mediator. the girl who almost got her happy ending... almost got it...

#chengxian

"this era is called: figuring out how to live without someone i thought i'd never lose"

#chengxian

"i love you"

"still?"

"still. always. i'd wait lifetimes for you. you would always be worth it"

( "it's in the past," he says. "goodbye,"he says and looks down and turns away to hide his lie...

... to hide all the love dripping from his eyes as he speaks.)

#xicheng wedding is announced and it's all whispers of "why is the lan heir marrying that ill mannered brute?" and "he is going to be worse than his mother, you'll see".

(and jc's heart hurts and his head hurts and he wonders...)

and then lxc says his vows ...

"part of me died in order to survive. i may grow again, but i will never be the same"

#jiangcheng

and then he takes a breath and opens his eyes and says, “i still am.”

( he doesn’t let go)

#jiangcheng

“and i will cut adrift. i will sit on the grass and stare at the sky. i will dream. i will take my mind out of its iron cage and let it swim.

i will make life beautiful. i will find a version of me that sits in the light”

#jiangcheng

“i want to go home. i want to go home…i want to go back. but back where?”

#jiangcheng #jinling

the card that’s waiting for jiang cheng when he comes to a-ling’s birthday party.

#jiangcheng #jinling

“am i a brother? some days i tell strangers i am an only child. other times i say i am the eldest. he is gone, she is gone, and i still cannot forgive, but what does that make me now? am i still a brother?”

#jiangcheng suffers so beautifully 💔