and most of the designs are neutral / unisex

You could try looking for male (categorically) slim-fit/skinny fleece-lined sweatpants / running wear, since those might offer more options for taller legs.

Zucchini Jams: www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/v9qay...

Chocolate Zucchini Cake: www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/3trzw...

Zucchini Bread: www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/4w27m...

So spherical!
I got recipes for zucchini bread, chocolate zucchini cake, strawberry zucchini jam, and more if any of those suit your needs.
Otherwise zucchini is very neutral and great to chop up into stews, soups, and stir-frys where it can soak up flavours.

Honorary mention to his gay little boyfriend

Kodai Kuremi? More like... Kodai Ku- in me....

I'm sorry, but I couldn't get this image out of my mind after reading this. 🪱

Here's just a little guy!